中国经典 》 红楼梦 A Dream of Red Mansions 》
第三十二回 诉肺腑心迷活宝玉 含耻辱情烈死金钏 CHAPTER XXXII.
曹雪芹 Cao Xueqin
高鹗 Gao E
CHAPTER XXXII.
话说宝玉见那麒麟，心中甚是欢喜，便伸手来拿，笑道：“亏你拣着了。你是那里拣的？"史湘云笑道：“幸而是这个，明儿倘或把印也丢了，难道也就罢了不成？"宝玉笑道：“倒是丢了印平常，若丢了这个，我就该死了。”袭人斟了茶来与史湘云吃，一面笑道：“大姑娘听见前儿你大喜了。”史湘云红了脸，吃茶不答。袭人道：“这会子又害臊了。你还记得十年前，咱们在西边暖阁住着，晚上你同我说的话儿？那会子不害臊，这会子怎么又害臊了？ "史湘云笑道：“你还说呢。那会子咱们那么好。后来我们太太没了，我家去住了一程子， 怎么就把你派了跟二哥哥，我来了，你就不象先待我了。”袭人笑道：“你还说呢。先姐姐长姐姐短哄着我替你梳头洗脸，作这个弄那个，如今大了，就拿出小姐的款来。你既拿小姐的款，我怎敢亲近呢？"史湘云道：“阿弥陀佛，冤枉冤哉！我要这样， 就立刻死了。你瞧瞧，这么大热天，我来了，必定赶来先瞧瞧你。不信你问问缕儿，我在家时时刻刻那一回不念你几声。 "话未了，忙的袭人和宝玉都劝道：“顽话你又认真了。 还是这么性急。”史湘云道：“你不说你的话噎人，倒说人性急。”一面说，一面打开手帕子，将戒指递与袭人。袭人感谢不尽，因笑道：“你前儿送你姐姐们的，我已得了， 今儿你亲自又送来，可见是没忘了我。只这个就试出你来了。戒指儿能值多少，可见你的心真。”史湘云道：“是谁给你的？"袭人道：“是宝姑娘给我的。”湘云笑道：“我只当是林姐姐给你的， 原来是宝钗姐姐给了你。我天天在家里想着，这些姐姐们再没一个比宝姐姐好的。可惜我们不是一个娘养的。我但凡有这么个亲姐姐，就是没了父母，也是没妨碍的。”说着，眼睛圈儿就红了。宝玉道：“罢，罢，罢！不用提这个话。”史湘云道：“ 提这个便怎么？我知道你的心病，恐怕你的林妹妹听见，又怪嗔我赞了宝姐姐。可是为这个不是？ "袭人在旁嗤的一笑，说道：“云姑娘，你如今大了，越发心直口快了。”宝玉笑道：“我说你们这几个人难说话，果然不错。”史湘云道：“好哥哥，你不必说话教我恶心。只会在我们跟前说话，见了你林妹妹，又不知怎么了。”
袭人道：“且别说顽话，正有一件事还要求你呢。”史湘云便问"什么事？"袭人道：“有一双鞋，抠了垫心子。我这两日身上不好，不得做，你可有工夫替我做做？"史湘云笑道：“这又奇了，你家放着这些巧人不算，还有什么针线上的，裁剪上的，怎么教我做起来？你的活计叫谁做，谁好意思不做呢。”袭人笑道：“你又糊涂了。你难道不知道，我们这屋里的针线， 是不要那些针线上的人做的。”史湘云听了，便知是宝玉的鞋了，因笑道：“既这么说，我就替你做了罢。只是一件，你的我才作，别人的我可不能。”袭人笑道：“又来了，我是个什么，就烦你做鞋了。实告诉你，可不是我的。你别管是谁的，横竖我领情就是了。”史湘云道：“论理，你的东西也不知烦我做了多少了，今儿我倒不做了的原故， 你必定也知道。”袭人道：“倒也不知道。”史湘云冷笑道：“前儿我听见把我做的扇套子拿着和人家比， 赌气又铰了。我早就听见了，你还瞒我。这会子又叫我做，我成了你们的奴才了。 "宝玉忙笑道：“前儿的那事，本不知是你做的。”袭人也笑道：“他本不知是你做的。是我哄他的话，说是新近外头有个会做活的女孩子，说扎的出奇的花，我叫他拿了一个扇套子试试看好不好。 他就信了，拿出去给这个瞧给那个看的。不知怎么又惹恼了林姑娘，铰了两段。回来他还叫赶着做去，我才说了是你作的，他后悔的什么似的。 "史湘云道：“越发奇了。林姑娘他也犯不上生气，他既会剪，就叫他做。”袭人道：“他可不作呢。饶这么着，老太太还怕他劳碌着了。大夫又说好生静养才好，谁还烦他做？ 旧年好一年的工夫，做了个香袋儿，今年半年，还没拿针线呢。”正说着，有人来回说：“兴隆街的大爷来了，老爷叫二爷出去会。”宝玉听了，便知是贾雨村来了，心中好不自在。 袭人忙去拿衣服。宝玉一面蹬着靴子，一面抱怨道：“有老爷和他坐着就罢了， 回回定要见我。”史湘云一边摇着扇子，笑道：“自然你能会宾接客，老爷才叫你出去呢。”宝玉道：“那里是老爷，都是他自己要请我去见的。”湘云笑道：“主雅客来勤，自然你有些警他的好处，他才只要会你。”宝玉道：“罢，罢，我也不敢称雅，俗中又俗的一个俗人，并不愿同这些人往来。”湘云笑道：“还是这个情性不改。如今大了，你就不愿读书去考举人进士的，也该常常的会会这些为官做宰的人们，谈谈讲讲些仕途经济的学问，也好将来应酬世务，日后也有个朋友。没见你成年家只在我们队里搅些什么！"宝玉听了道：“姑娘请别的姊妹屋里坐坐，我这里仔细污了你知经济学问的。”袭人道：“云姑娘快别说这话。上回也是宝姑娘也说过一回，他也不管人脸上过的去过不去，他就咳了一声，拿起脚来走了。这里宝姑娘的话也没说完，见他走了，登时羞的脸通红，说又不是，不说又不是。幸而是宝姑娘，那要是林姑娘，不知又闹到怎么样，哭的怎么样呢。 提起这个话来，真真的宝姑娘叫人敬重，自己讪了一会子去了。我倒过不去，只当他恼了。谁知过后还是照旧一样，真真有涵养，心地宽大。谁知这一个反倒同他生分了。那林姑娘见你赌气不理他，你得赔多少不是呢。”宝玉道：“林姑娘从来说过这些混帐话不曾？若他也说过这些混帐话，我早和他生分了。”袭人和湘云都点头笑道：“这原是混帐话。"原来林黛玉知道史湘云在这里，宝玉又赶来，一定说麒麟的原故。因此心下忖度着，近日宝玉弄来的外传野史，多半才子佳人都因小巧玩物上撮合，或有鸳鸯，或有凤凰，或玉环金ぐ，或鲛帕鸾绦，皆由小物而遂终身。今忽见宝玉亦有麒麟，便恐借此生隙，同史湘云也做出那些风流佳事来。因而悄悄走来，见机行事，以察二人之意。不想刚走来，正听见史湘云说经济一事，宝玉又说：“林妹妹不说这样混帐话，若说这话， 我也和他生分了。”林黛玉听了这话，不觉又喜又惊，又悲又叹。所喜者，果然自己眼力不错， 素日认他是个知己，果然是个知己。所惊者，他在人前一片私心称扬于我，其亲热厚密， 竟不避嫌疑。所叹者，你既为我之知己，自然我亦可为你之知己矣，既你我为知己，则又何必有金玉之论哉；既有金玉之论，亦该你我有之，则又何必来一宝钗哉！所悲者，父母早逝，虽有铭心刻骨之言，无人为我主张。况近日每觉神思恍惚，病已渐成， 医者更云气弱血亏，恐致劳怯之症，你我虽为知己，但恐自不能久待，你纵为我知己， 奈我薄命何！想到此间，不禁滚下泪来。待进去相见，自觉无味，便一面拭泪，一面抽身回去了。
这里宝玉忙忙的穿了衣裳出来， 忽见林黛玉在前面慢慢的走着，似有拭泪之状，便忙赶上来， 笑道：“妹妹往那里去？怎么又哭了？又是谁得罪了你？"林黛玉回头见是宝玉，便勉强笑道：“好好的，我何曾哭了。”宝玉笑道：“你瞧瞧，眼睛上的泪珠儿未干，还撒谎呢。 "一面说，一面禁不住抬起手来替他拭泪。林黛玉忙向后退了几步，说道：“你又要死了！ 作什么这么动手动脚的！"宝玉笑道：“说话忘了情，不觉的动了手，也就顾不的死活。 "林黛玉道：“你死了倒不值什么，只是丢下了什么金，又是什么麒麟，可怎么样呢？"一句话又把宝玉说急了，赶上来问道：“你还说这话，到底是咒我还是气我呢？"林黛玉见问，方想起前日的事来，遂自悔自己又说造次了，忙笑道：“你别着急，我原说错了。这有什么的，筋都暴起来，急的一脸汗。”一面说，一面禁不住近前伸手替他拭面上的汗。宝玉瞅了半天，方说道"你放心"三个字。林黛玉听了，怔了半天，方说道：“我有什么不放心的？我不明白这话。你倒说说怎么放心不放心？"宝玉叹了一口气，问道：“你果不明白这话？难道我素日在你身上的心都用错了？连你的意思
若体贴不着， 就难怪你天天为我生气了。”林黛玉道：“果然我不明白放心不放心的话。”宝玉点头叹道：“好妹妹，你别哄我。果然不明白这话，不但我素日之意白用了，且连你素日待我之意也都辜负了。 你皆因总是不放心的原故Wolff，1679—1754）则首次把哲学分为本体论、宇宙论、心，才弄了一身病。但凡宽慰些，这病也不得一日重似一日。”林黛玉听了这话，如轰雷掣电，细细思之，竟比自己肺腑中掏出来的还觉恳切，竟有万句言语，满心要说，只是半个字也不能吐，却怔怔的望着他。此时宝玉心中也有万句言语，不知从那一句上说起，却也怔怔的望着黛玉。两个人怔了半天，林黛玉只咳了一声，两眼不觉滚下泪来，回身便要走。宝玉忙上前拉住，说道：“好妹妹，且略站住，我说一句话再走。”林黛玉一面拭泪，一面将手推开，说道：“有什么可说的。你的话我早知道了！"口里说着，却头也不回竟去了。
宝玉站着， 只管发起呆来。原来方才出来慌忙，不曾带得扇子，袭人怕他热，忙拿了扇子赶来送与他，忽抬头见了林黛玉和他站着。一时黛玉走了，他还站着不动，因而赶上来说道：“你也不带了扇子去，亏我看见，赶了送来。”宝玉出了神，见袭人和他说话，并未看出是何人来，便一把拉住，说道：“好妹妹，我的这心事，从来也不敢说，今儿我大胆说出来， 死也甘心！我为你也弄了一身的病在这里，又不敢告诉人，只好掩着。只等你的病好了， 只怕我的病才得好呢。睡里梦里也忘不了你！"袭人听了这话，吓得魄消魂散， 只叫"神天菩萨，坑死我了！"便推他道：“这是那里的话！敢是中了邪？还不快去？"宝玉一时醒过来，方知是袭人送扇子来，羞的满面紫涨，夺了扇子，便忙忙的抽身跑了。
这里袭人见他去了，自思方才之言，一定是因黛玉而起，如此看来，将来难免不才之事，令人可惊可畏。想到此间，也不觉怔怔的滴下泪来，心下暗度如何处治方免此丑祸。 正裁疑间，忽有宝钗从那边走来，笑道：“大毒日头地下，出什么神呢？"袭人见问，忙笑道：“那边两个雀儿打架，倒也好玩，我就看住了。”宝钗道：“宝兄弟这会子穿了衣服， 忙忙的那去了？我才看见走过去，倒要叫住问他呢。他如今说话越发没了经纬，我故此没叫他了，由他过去罢。”袭人道：“老爷叫他出去。”宝钗听了，忙道：嗳哟！这么黄天暑热的， 叫他做什么！别是想起什么来生了气，叫出去教训一场。”袭人笑道：“不是这个，想是有客要会。”宝钗笑道：“这个客也没意思，这么热天，不在家里凉快，还跑些什么！"袭人笑道：“倒是你说说罢。”
宝钗因而问道：“云丫头在你们家做什么呢？"袭人笑道：’才说了一会子闲话。你瞧， 我前儿粘的那双鞋，明儿叫他做去。”宝钗听见这话，便两边回头，看无人来往用语。指物体投射出来的形象。它与感官相接触而产生感觉。，便笑道：“你这么个明白人，怎么一时半刻的就不会体谅人情。我近来看着云丫头神情，
再风里言风里语的听起来，那云丫头在家里竟一点儿作不得主。他们家嫌费用大，竟不用那些针线上的人，差不多的东西多是他们娘儿们动手。为什么这几次他来了，他和我说话儿，见没人在跟前，他就说家里累的很。我再问他两句家常过日子的话，他就连眼圈儿都红了，口里含含糊糊待说不说的。想其形景来，自然从小儿没爹娘的苦。我看着他， 也不觉的伤起心来。”袭人见说这话，将手一拍，说：“是了，是了。怪道上月我烦他打十根蝴蝶结子，过了那些日子才打发人送来，还说‘打的粗，且在别处能着使罢， 要匀净的，等明儿来住着再好生打罢’。如今听宝姑娘这话，想来我们烦他他不好推辞，不知他在家里怎么三更半夜的做呢。可是我也糊涂了，早知是这样，我也不烦他了。 "宝钗道：“上次他就告诉我，在家里做活做到三更天，若是替别人做一点半点，他家的那些奶奶太太们还不受用呢。 "袭人道：“偏生我们那个牛心左性的小爷，凭着小的大的活计，一概不要家里这些活计上的人作。我又弄不开这些。”宝钗笑道：“你理他呢！只管叫人做去，只说是你做的就是了。”袭人笑道：“那里哄的信他，他才是认得出来呢。说不得我只好慢慢的累去罢了。”宝钗笑道：’你不必忙，我替你作些如何？"袭人笑道：“当真的这样，就是我的福了。晚上我亲自送过来。”
一句话未了， 忽见一个老婆子忙忙走来，说道：“这是那里说起！金钏儿姑娘好好的投井死了！"袭人唬了一跳，忙问"那个金钏儿？"老婆子道：“那里还有两个金钏儿呢？ 就是太太屋里的。前儿不知为什么撵他出去，在家里哭天哭地的，也都不理会他，谁知找他不见了。 刚才打水的人在那东南角上井里打水，见一个尸首，赶着叫人打捞起来， 谁知是他。他们家里还只管乱着要救活，那里中用了！"宝钗道：“这也奇了。”袭人听说， 点头赞叹，想素日同气之情，不觉流下泪来。宝钗听见这话，忙向王夫人处来道安慰。这里袭人回去不提。
却说宝钗来至王夫人处， 只见鸦雀无闻，独有王夫人在里间房内坐着垂泪。宝钗便不好提这事，只得一旁坐了。王夫人便问：“你从那里来？"宝钗道：“从园里来。”王夫人道：“你从园里来，可见你宝兄弟？"宝钗道：“才倒看见了。他穿了衣服出去了用”命题，并以刃利之喻，论证神随形灭而灭。发展了管子、，不知那里去。”王夫人点头哭道：“你可知道一桩奇事？金钏儿忽然投井死了！"宝钗见说，道：“怎么好好的投井？这也奇了。”王夫人道：“原是前儿他把我一件东西弄坏了，我一时生气，打了他几下，撵了他下去。我只说气他两天，还叫他上来，谁知他这么气性大，就投井死了。岂不是我的罪过。”宝钗叹道：“姨娘是慈善人，固然这么想。据我看来，他并不是赌气投井。多半他下去住着，或是在井跟前憨顽，失了脚掉下去的。他在上头拘束惯了， 这一出去，自然要到各处去顽顽逛逛，岂有这样大气的理！纵然有这样大气，也不过是个糊涂人，也不为可惜。”王夫人点头叹道：“这话虽然如此说，到底我心不安。”宝钗叹道：“姨娘也不必念念于兹，十分过不去，不过多赏他几两银子发送他，也就尽主仆之情了。 "王夫人道：“刚才我赏了他娘五十两银子，原要还把你妹妹们的新衣服拿两套给他妆裹。谁知凤丫头说可巧都没什么新做的衣服，只有你林妹妹作生日的两套。 我想你林妹妹那个孩子素日是个有心的，况且他也三灾八难的，既说了给他过生日， 这会子又给人妆裹去，岂不忌讳。因为这么样，我现叫裁缝赶两套给他。要是别的丫头， 赏他几两银子就完了，只是金钏儿虽然是个丫头，素日在我跟前比我的女儿也差不多。 "口里说着，不觉泪下。宝钗忙道：“姨娘这会子又何用叫裁缝赶去，我前儿倒做了两套， 拿来给他岂不省事。况且他活着的时候也穿过我的旧衣服，身量又相对。”王夫人道：“虽然这样，难道你不忌讳？"宝钗笑道：“姨娘放心，我从来不计较这些。”一面说，一面起身就走。王夫人忙叫了两个人来跟宝姑娘去。
一时宝钗取了衣服回来， 只见宝玉在王夫人旁边坐着垂泪。王夫人正才说他，因宝钗来了，却掩了口不说了。宝钗见此光景，察言观色，早知觉了八分，于是将衣服交割明白。王夫人将他母亲叫来拿了去。再看下回便知。
Hsi Jen and Hsiang-yuen tell their secret thoughts. Tai-yue is infatuated with the living Pao-yue.
While trying to conceal her sense of shame and injury Chin Ch'uan is driven by her impetuous feelings to seek death.
But to resume our narrative. At the sight of the unicorn, Pao-yue was filled with intense delight. So much so, that he forthwith put out his hand and made a grab for it. "Lucky enough it was you who picked it up!" he said, with a face beaming with smiles. "But when did you find it?"
"Fortunately it was only this!" rejoined Shih Hsiang-yuen laughing. "If you by and bye also lose your seal, will you likely banish it at once from your mind, and never make an effort to discover it?"
"After all," smiled Pao-yue, "the loss of a seal is an ordinary occurrence. But had I lost this, I would have deserved to die."
Hsi Jen then poured a cup of tea and handed it to Shih Hsiang-yuen. "Miss Senior," she remarked smilingly, "I heard that you had occasion the other day to be highly pleased."
Shih Hsiang-yuen flushed crimson. She went on drinking her tea and did not utter a single word.
"Here you are again full of shame!" Hsi Jen smiled. "But do you remember when we were living, about ten years back, in those warm rooms on the west side and you confided in me one evening, you didn't feel any shame then; and how is it you blush like this now?"
"Do you still speak about that!" exclaimed Shih Hsiang-yuen laughingly. "You and I were then great friends. But when our mother subsequently died and I went home for a while, how is it you were at once sent to be with my cousin Secundus, and that now that I've come back you don't treat me as you did once?"
"Are you yet harping on this!" retorted Hsi Jen, putting on a smile. "Why, at first, you used to coax me with a lot of endearing terms to comb your hair and to wash your face, to do this and that for you. But now that you've become a big girl, you assume the manner of a young mistress towards me, and as you put on these airs of a young mistress, how can I ever presume to be on a familiar footing with you?"
"O-mi-to-fu," cried Shih Hsiang-yuen. "What a false accusation! If I be guilty of anything of the kind, may I at once die! Just see what a broiling hot day this is, and yet as soon as I arrived I felt bound to come and look you up first. If you don't believe me, well, ask Lue Erh! And while at home, when did I not at every instant say something about you?"
Scarcely had she concluded than Hsi Jen and Pao-yue tried to soothe her. "We were only joking," they said, "but you've taken everything again as gospel. What! are you still so impetuous in your temperament!"
"You don't say," argued Shih Hsiang-yuen, "that your words are hard things to swallow, but contrariwise, call people's temperaments impetuous!"
As she spoke, she unfolded her handkerchief and, producing a ring, she gave it to Hsi Jen.
Hsi Jen did not know how to thank her enough. "When;" she consequently smiled, "you sent those to your cousin the other day, I got one also; and here you yourself bring me another to-day! It's clear enough therefore that you haven't forgotten me. This alone has been quite enough to test you. As for the ring itself, what is its worth? but it's a token of the sincerity of your heart!"
"Who gave it to you?" inquired Shih Hsiang-yuen.
"Miss Pao let me have it." replied Hsi Jen.
"I was under the impression," remarked Hsiang-yuen with a sigh, "that it was a present from cousin Lin. But is it really cousin Pao, that gave it to you! When I was at home, I day after day found myself reflecting that among all these cousins of mine, there wasn't one able to compare with cousin Pao, so excellent is she. How I do regret that we are not the offspring of one mother! For could I boast of such a sister of the same flesh and blood as myself, it wouldn't matter though I had lost both father and mother!"
While indulging in these regrets, her eyes got quite red.
"Never mind! never mind!" interposed Pao-yue. "Why need you speak of these things!"
"If I do allude to this," answered Shih Hsiang-yuen, "what does it matter? I know that weak point of yours. You're in fear and trembling lest your cousin Lin should come to hear what I say, and get angry with me again for eulogising cousin Pao! Now isn't it this, eh!"
"Ch'ih!" laughed Hsi Jen, who was standing by her. "Miss Yuen," she said, "now that you've grown up to be a big girl you've become more than ever openhearted and outspoken."
"When I contend;" smiled Pao-yue, "that it is difficult to say a word to any one of you I'm indeed perfectly correct!"
"My dear cousin," observed Shih Hsiang-yuen laughingly, "don't go on in that strain! You'll provoke me to displeasure. When you are with me all you are good for is to talk and talk away; but were you to catch a glimpse of cousin Lin, you would once more be quite at a loss to know what best to do!"
"Now, enough of your jokes!" urged Hsi Jen. "I have a favour to crave of you."
"What is it?" vehemently inquired Shih Hsiang-yuen.
"I've got a pair of shoes," answered Hsi Jen, "for which I've stuck the padding together; but I'm not feeling up to the mark these last few days, so I haven't been able to work at them. If you have any leisure, do finish them for me."
"This is indeed strange!" exclaimed Shih Hsiang-yuen. "Putting aside all the skilful workers engaged in your household, you have besides some people for doing needlework and others for tailoring and cutting; and how is it you appeal to me to take your shoes in hand? Were you to ask any one of those men to execute your work, who could very well refuse to do it?"
"Here you are in another stupid mood!" laughed Hsi Jen. "Can it be that you don't know that our sewing in these quarters mayn't be done by these needleworkers."
At this reply, it at once dawned upon Shih Hsiang-yuen that the shoes must be intended for Pao-yue. "Since that be the case," she in consequence smiled; "I'll work them for you. There's however one thing. I'll readily attend to any of yours, but I will have nothing to do with any for other people."
"There you are again!" laughed Hsi Jen. "Who am I to venture to trouble you to make shoes for me? I'll tell you plainly, however, that they are not mine. But no matter whose they are, it is anyhow I who'll be the recipient of your favour; that is sufficient."
"To speak the truth," rejoined Shih Hsiang-yuen, "you've put me to the trouble of working, I don't know how many things for you. The reason why I refuse on this occasion should be quite evident to you!"
"I can't nevertheless make it out!" answered Hsi Jen.
"I heard the other day," continued Shih Hsiang-yuen, a sardonic smile on her lip, "that while the fan-case, I had worked, was being held and compared with that of some one else, it too was slashed away in a fit of high dudgeon. This reached my ears long ago, and do you still try to dupe me by asking me again now to make something more for you? Have I really become a slave to you people?
"As to what occurred the other day," hastily explained Pao-yue smiling, "I positively had no idea that that thing was your handiwork."
"He never knew that you'd done it," Hsi Jen also laughed. "I deceived him by telling him that there had been of late some capital hands at needlework outside, who could execute any embroidery with surpassing beauty, and that I had asked them to bring a fan-case so as to try them and to see whether they could actually work well or not. He at once believed what I said. But as he produced the case and gave it to this one and that one to look at, he somehow or other, I don't know how, managed again to put some one's back up, and she cut it into two. On his return, however, he bade me hurry the men to make another; and when at length I explained to him that it had been worked by you, he felt, I can't tell you, what keen regret!"
"This is getting stranger and stranger!" said Shih Hsiang-yuen. "It wasn't worth the while for Miss Lin to lose her temper about it. But as she plies the scissors so admirably, why, you might as well tell her to finish the shoes for you."
"She couldn't," replied Hsi Jen, "for besides other things our venerable lady is still in fear and trembling lest she should tire herself in any way. The doctor likewise says that she will continue to enjoy good health, so long as she is carefully looked after; so who would wish to ask her to take them in hand? Last year she managed to just get through a scented bag, after a whole year's work. But here we've already reached the middle of the present year, and she hasn't yet taken up any needle or thread!"
In the course of their conversation, a servant came and announced 'that the gentleman who lived in the Hsing Lung Street had come.' "Our master," he added, "bids you, Mr. Secundus, come out and greet him."
As soon as Pao-yue heard this announcement, he knew that Chia Yue-ts'un must have arrived. But he felt very unhappy at heart. Hsi Jen hurried to go and bring his clothes. Pao-yue, meanwhile, put on his boots, but as he did so, he gave way to resentment. "Why there's father," he soliloquised, "to sit with him; that should be enough; and must he, on every visit he pays, insist upon seeing me!"
"It is, of course, because you have such a knack for receiving and entertaining visitors that Mr. Chia Cheng will have you go out," laughingly interposed Shih Hsiang-yuen from one side, as she waved her fan.
"Is it father's doing?" Pao-yue rejoined. "Why, it's he himself who asks that I should be sent for to see him."
"'When a host is courteous, visitors come often,'" smiled Hsiang-yuen, "so it's surely because you possess certain qualities, which have won his regard, that he insists upon seeing you."
"But I am not what one would call courteous," demurred Pao-yue. "I am, of all coarse people, the coarsest. Besides, I do not choose to have any relations with such people as himself."
"Here's again that unchangeable temperament of yours!" laughed Hsiang-yuen. "But you're a big fellow now, and you should at least, if you be loth to study and go and pass your examinations for a provincial graduate or a metropolitan graduate, have frequent intercourse with officers and ministers of state and discuss those varied attainments, which one acquires in an official career, so that you also may be able in time to have some idea about matters in general; and that when by and bye you've made friends, they may not see you spending the whole day long in doing nothing than loafing in our midst, up to every imaginable mischief."
"Miss," exclaimed Pao-yue, after this harangue, "pray go and sit in some other girl's room, for mind one like myself may contaminate a person who knows so much of attainments and experience as you do."
"Miss," ventured Hsi Jen, "drop this at once! Last time Miss Pao too tendered him this advice, but without troubling himself as to whether people would feel uneasy or not, he simply came out with an ejaculation of 'hai,' and rushed out of the place. Miss Pao hadn't meanwhile concluded her say, so when she saw him fly, she got so full of shame that, flushing scarlet, she could neither open her lips, nor hold her own counsel. But lucky for him it was only Miss Pao. Had it been Miss Lin, there's no saying what row there may not have been again, and what tears may not have been shed! Yet the very mention of all she had to tell him is enough to make people look up to Miss Pao with respect. But after a time, she also betook herself away. I then felt very unhappy as I imagined that she was angry; but contrary to all my expectations, she was by and bye just the same as ever. She is, in very truth, long-suffering and indulgent! This other party contrariwise became quite distant to her, little though one would have thought it of him; and as Miss Pao perceived that he had lost his temper, and didn't choose to heed her, she subsequently made I don't know how many apologies to him."
"Did Miss Lin ever talk such trash!" exclaimed Pao-yue. "Had she ever talked such stuff and nonsense, I would have long ago become chilled towards her."
"What you say is all trash!" Hsi Jen and Hsiang-yuen remarked with one voice, while they shook their heads to and fro and smiled.
Lin Tai-yue, the fact is, was well aware that now that Shih Hsiang-yuen was staying in the mansion, Pao-yue too was certain to hasten to come and tell her all about the unicorn he had got, so she thought to herself: "In the foreign traditions and wild stories, introduced here of late by Pao-yue, literary persons and pretty girls are, for the most part, brought together in marriage, through the agency of some trifling but ingenious nick-nack. These people either have miniature ducks, or phoenixes, jade necklets or gold pendants, fine handkerchiefs or elegant sashes; and they have, through the instrumentality of such trivial objects, invariably succeeded in accomplishing the wishes they entertained throughout their lives." When she recently discovered, by some unforeseen way, that Pao-yue had likewise a unicorn she began to apprehend lest he should make this circumstance a pretext to create an estrangement with her, and indulge with Shih Hsiang-yuen as well in various free and easy flirtations and fine doings. She therefore quietly crossed over to watch her opportunity and take such action as would enable her to get an insight into his and her sentiments. Contrary, however, to all her calculations, no sooner did she reach her destination, than she overheard Shih Hsiang-yuen dilate on the topic of experience, and Pao-yue go on to observe: "Cousin Lin has never indulged in such stuff and nonsense. Had she ever uttered any such trash, I would have become chilled even towards her!" This language suddenly produced, in Lin Tai-yue's mind, both surprise as well as delight; sadness as well as regret. Delight, at having indeed been so correct in her perception that he whom she had ever considered in the light of a true friend had actually turned out to be a true friend. Surprise, "because," she said to herself: "he has, in the presence of so many witnesses, displayed such partiality as to speak in my praise, and has shown such affection and friendliness for me as to make no attempt whatever to shirk suspicion." Regret, "for since," (she pondered), "you are my intimate friend, you could certainly well look upon me too as your intimate friend; and if you and I be real friends, why need there be any more talk about gold and jade? But since there be that question of gold and jade, you and I should have such things in our possession. Yet, why should this Pao-ch'ai step in again between us?" Sad, "because," (she reflected), "my father and mother departed life at an early period; and because I have, in spite of the secret engraven on my heart and imprinted on my bones, not a soul to act as a mentor to me. Besides, of late, I continuously feel confusion creep over my mind, so my disease must already have gradually developed itself. The doctors further state that my breath is weak and my blood poor, and that they dread lest consumption should declare itself, so despite that sincere friendship I foster for you, I cannot, I fear, last for very long. You are, I admit, a true friend to me, but what can you do for my unfortunate destiny!"
Upon reaching this point in her reflections, she could not control her tears, and they rolled freely down her cheeks. So much so, that when about to enter and meet her cousins, she experienced such utter lack of zest, that, while drying her tears she turned round, and wended her steps back in the direction of her apartments.
Pao-yue, meanwhile, had hurriedly got into his new costume. Upon coming out of doors, he caught sight of Lin Tai-yue, walking quietly ahead of him engaged, to all appearances, in wiping tears from her eyes. With rapid stride, he overtook her.
"Cousin Lin," he smiled, "where are you off to? How is it that you're crying again? Who has once more hurt your feelings?"
Lin Tai-yue turned her head round to look; and seeing that it was Pao-yue, she at once forced a smile. "Why should I be crying," she replied, "when there is no reason to do so?"
"Look here!" observed Pao-yue smilingly. "The tears in your eyes are not dry yet and do you still tell me a fib?"
Saying this, he could not check an impulse to raise his arm and wipe her eyes, but Lin Tai-yue speedily withdrew several steps backwards. "Are you again bent," she said, "upon compassing your own death! Then why do you knock your hands and kick your feet about in this wise?"
"While intent upon speaking, I forgot," smiled Pao-yue, "all about propriety and gesticulated, yet quite inadvertently. But what care I whether I die or live!"
"To die would, after all" added Lin Tai-yue, "be for you of no matter; but you'll leave behind some gold or other, and a unicorn too or other; and what would they do?"
This insinuation was enough to plunge Pao-yue into a fresh fit of exasperation. Hastening up to her: "Do you still give vent to such language?" he asked. "Why, it's really tantamount to invoking imprecations on me! What, are you yet angry with me!"
This question recalled to Lin Tai-yue's mind the incidents of a few days back, and a pang of remorse immediately gnawed her heart for having been again so indiscreet in her speech. "Now don't you distress your mind!" she observed hastily, smiling. "I verily said what I shouldn't! Yet what is there in this to make your veins protrude, and to so provoke you as to bedew your whole face with perspiration?"
While reasoning with him, she felt unable to repress herself, and, approaching him, she extended her hand, and wiped the perspiration from his face.
Pao-yue gazed intently at her for a long time. "Do set your mind at ease!" he at length observed.
At this remark, Lin Tai-yue felt quite nervous. "What's there to make my mind uneasy?" she asked after a protracted interval. "I can't make out what you're driving at; tell me what's this about making me easy or uneasy?"
Pao-yue heaved a sigh. "Don't you truly fathom the depth of my words?" he inquired. "Why, do you mean to say that I've throughout made such poor use of my love for you as not to be able to even divine your feelings? Well, if so, it's no wonder that you daily lose your temper on my account!"
"I actually don't understand what you mean by easy or uneasy," Lin Tai-yue replied.
"My dear girl," urged Pao-yue, nodding and sighing. "Don't be making a fool of me! For if you can't make out these words, not only have I ever uselessly lavished affection upon you, but the regard, with which you have always treated me, has likewise been entirely of no avail! And it's mostly because you won't set your mind at ease that your whole frame is riddled with disease. Had you taken things easier a bit, this ailment of yours too wouldn't have grown worse from day to day!"
These words made Lin Tai-yue feel as if she had been blasted by thunder, or struck by lightning. But after carefully weighing them within herself, they seemed to her far more fervent than any that might have emanated from the depths of her own heart, and thousands of sentiments, in fact, thronged together in her mind; but though she had every wish to frame them into language, she found it a hard task to pronounce so much as half a word. All she therefore did was to gaze at him with vacant stare.
Pao-yue fostered innumerable thoughts within himself, but unable in a moment to resolve from which particular one to begin, he too absently looked at Tai-yue. Thus it was that the two cousins remained for a long time under the spell of a deep reverie.
An ejaculation of "Hai!" was the only sound that issued from Lin Tai-yue's lips; and while tears streamed suddenly from her eyes, she turned herself round and started on her way homeward.
Pao-yue jumped forward, with alacrity, and dragged her back. "My dear cousin," he pleaded, "do stop a bit! Let me tell you just one thing; after that, you may go."
"What can you have to tell me?" exclaimed Lin Tai-yue, who while wiping her tears, extricated her hand from his grasp. "I know." she cried, "all you have to say."
As she spoke, she went away, without even turning her head to cast a glance behind her.
As Pao-yue gazed at her receding figure, he fell into abstraction.
He had, in fact, quitted his apartments a few moments back in such precipitate hurry that he had omitted to take a fan with him: and Hsi Jen, fearing lest he might suffer from the heat, promptly seized one and ran to find him and give it to him. But upon casually raising her head, she espied Lin Tai-yue standing with him. After a time, Tai-yue walked away; and as he still remained where he was without budging, she approached him.
"You left," she said, "without even taking a fan with you. Happily I noticed it, and so hurried to catch you up and bring it to you."
But Pao-yue was so lost in thought that as soon as he caught Hsi Jen's voice, he made a dash and clasped her in his embrace, without so much as trying to make sure who she was.
"My dear cousin," he cried, "I couldn't hitherto muster enough courage to disclose the secrets of my heart; but on this occasion I shall make bold and give utterance to them. For you I'm quite ready to even pay the penalty of death. I have too for your sake brought ailments upon my whole frame. It's in here! But I haven't ventured to breathe it to any one. My only alternative has been to bear it patiently, in the hope that when you got all right, I might then perchance also recover. But whether I sleep, or whether I dream, I never, never forget you."
These declarations quite dumfoundered Hsi Jen. She gave way to incessant apprehensions. All she could do was to shout out: "Oh spirits, oh heaven, oh Buddha, he's compassing my death!" Then pushing him away from her, "what is it you're saying?" she asked. "May it be that you are possessed by some evil spirit! Don't you quick get yourself off?"
This brought Pao-yue to his senses at once. He then became aware that it was Hsi Jen, and that she had come to bring him a fan. Pao-yue was overpowered with shame; his whole face was suffused with scarlet; and, snatching the fan out of her hands, he bolted away with rapid stride.
When Hsi Jen meanwhile saw Pao-yue effect his escape, "Lin Tai-yue," she pondered, "must surely be at the bottom of all he said just now. But from what one can see, it will be difficult, in the future, to obviate the occurrence of some unpleasant mishap. It's sufficient to fill one with fear and trembling!"
At this point in her cogitations, she involuntarily melted into tears, so agitated was she; while she secretly exercised her mind how best to act so as to prevent this dreadful calamity.
But while she was lost in this maze of surmises and doubts, Pao-ch'ai unexpectedly appeared from the off side. "What!" she smilingly exclaimed, "are you dreaming away in a hot broiling sun like this?"
Hsi Jen, at this question, hastily returned her smiles. "Those two birds," she answered, "were having a fight, and such fun was it that I stopped to watch them."
"Where is cousin Pao off to now in such a hurry, got up in that fine attire?" asked Pao-ch'ai, "I just caught sight of him, as he went by. I meant to have called out and stopped him, but as he, of late, talks greater rubbish than ever, I didn't challenge him, but let him go past."
"Our master," rejoined Hsi Jen, "sent for him to go out."
"Ai-yah!" hastily exclaimed Pao-ch'ai, as soon as this remark reached her ears. "What does he want him for, on a scalding day like this? Might he not have thought of something and got so angry about it as to send for him to give him a lecture!"
"If it isn't this," added Hsi Jen laughing, "some visitor must, I presume, have come and he wishes him to meet him."
"With weather like this," smiled Pao-ch'ai, "even visitors afford no amusement! Why don't they, while this fiery temperature lasts, stay at home, where it's much cooler, instead of gadding about all over the place?"
"Could you tell them so?" smiled Hsi Jen.
"What was that girl Hsiang-yuen doing in your quarters?" Pao-ch'ai then asked.
"She only came to chat with us on irrelevant matters." Hsi Jen replied smiling. "But did you see the pair of shoes I was pasting the other day? Well, I meant to ask her to-morrow to finish them for me."
Pao-chai, at these words, turned her head round, first on this side, and then on the other. Seeing that there was no one coming or going: "How is it," she smiled, "that you, who have so much gumption, don't ever show any respect for people's feelings? I've been of late keeping an eye on Miss Yuen's manner, and, from what I can glean from the various rumours afloat, she can't be, in the slightest degree, her own mistress at home! In that family of theirs, so little can they stand the burden of any heavy expenses that they don't employ any needlework-people, and ordinary everyday things are mostly attended to by their ladies themselves. (If not), why is it that every time she has come to us on a visit, and she and I have had a chat, she at once broached the subject of their being in great difficulties at home, the moment she perceived that there was no one present? Yet, whenever I went on to ask her a few questions about their usual way of living, her very eyes grew red, while she made some indistinct reply; but as for speaking out, she wouldn't. But when I consider the circumstances in which she is placed, for she has certainly had the misfortune of being left, from her very infancy, without father and mother, the very sight of her is too much for me, and my heart begins to bleed within me."
"Quite so! Quite so!" observed Hsi Jen, clapping her hands, after listening to her throughout. "It isn't strange then if she let me have the ten butterfly knots I asked her to tie for me only after ever so many days, and if she said that they were coarsely done, but that I should make the best of them and use them elsewhere, and that if I wanted any nice ones, I should wait until by and bye when she came to stay here, when she would work some neatly for me. What you've told me now reminds me that, as she had found it difficult to find an excuse when we appealed to her, she must have had to slave away, who knows how much, till the third watch in the middle of the night. What a stupid thing I was! Had I known this sooner, I would never have told her a word about it."
"Last time;" continued Pao-ch'ai, "she told me that when she was at home she had ample to do, that she kept busy as late as the third watch, and that, if she did the slightest stitch of work for any other people, the various ladies, belonging to her family, did not like it."
"But as it happens," explained Hsi Jen, "that mulish-minded and perverse-tempered young master of ours won't allow the least bit of needlework, no matter whether small or large, to be made by those persons employed to do sewing in the household. And as for me, I have no time to turn my attention to all these things."
"Why mind him?" laughed Pao-ch'ai. "Simply ask some one to do the work and finish."
"How could one bamboozle him?" resumed Hsi Jen. "Why, he'll promptly find out everything. Such a thing can't even be suggested. The only thing I can do is to quietly slave away, that's all."
"You shouldn't work so hard," smiled Pao-ch'ai. "What do you say to my doing a few things for you?"
"Are you in real earnest!" ventured Hsi Jen smiling. "Well, in that case, it is indeed a piece of good fortune for me! I'll come over myself in the evening."
But before she could conclude her reply, she of a sudden noticed an old matron come up to her with precipitate step. "Where does the report come from," she interposed, "that Miss Chin Ch'uan-erh has gone, for no rhyme or reason, and committed suicide by jumping into the well?"
This bit of news startled Hsi Jen. "Which Chin Ch'uan-erh is it," she speedily inquired.
"Where are two Chin Ch'uan-erhs to be found!" rejoined the old matron. "It's the one in our Mistress,' Madame Wang's, apartments, who was the other day sent away for something or other, I don't know what. On her return home, she raised her groans to the skies and shed profuse tears, but none of them worried their minds about her, until, who'd have thought it, they could see nothing of her. A servant, however, went just now to draw water and he says that 'while he was getting it from the well in the south-east corner, he caught sight of a dead body, that he hurriedly called men to his help, and that when they fished it out, they unexpectedly found that it was she, but that though they bustled about trying to bring her round, everything proved of no avail'"
"This is odd!" Pao-ch'ai exclaimed.
The moment Hsi Jen heard the tidings, she shook her head and moaned. At the remembrance of the friendship, which had ever existed between them, tears suddenly trickled down her cheeks. And as for Pao-ch'ai, she listened to the account of the accident and then hastened to Madame Wang's quarters to try and afford her consolation.
Hsi Jen, during this interval, returned to her room. But we will leave her without further notice, and explain that when Pao-ch'ai reached the interior of Madame Wang's home, she found everything plunged in perfect stillness. Madame Wang was seated all alone in the inner chamber indulging her sorrow. But such difficulties did Pao-ch'ai experience to allude to the occurrence, that her only alternative was to take a seat next to her.
"Where do you come from?" asked Madame Wang.
"I come from inside the garden," answered Pao-ch'ai.
"As you come from the garden," Madame Wang inquired, "did you see anything of your cousin Pao-yue?"
"I saw him just now," Pao-ch'ai replied, "go out, dressed up in his fineries. But where he is gone to, I don't know."
"Have you perchance heard of any strange occurrence?" asked Madame Wang, while she nodded her head and sighed. "Why, Chin Ch'uan Erh jumped into the well and committed suicide."
"How is it that she jumped into the well when there was nothing to make her do so?" Pao-ch'ai inquired. "This is indeed a remarkable thing!"
"The fact is," proceeded Madame Wang, "that she spoilt something the other day, and in a sudden fit of temper, I gave her a slap and sent her away, simply meaning to be angry with her for a few days and then bring her in again. But, who could have ever imagined that she had such a resentful temperament as to go and drown herself in a well! And is not this all my fault?"
"It's because you are such a kind-hearted person, aunt," smiled Pao-ch'ai, "that such ideas cross your mind! But she didn't jump into the well when she was in a tantrum; so what must have made her do so was that she had to go and live in the lower quarters. Or, she might have been standing in front of the well, and her foot slipped, and she fell into it. While in the upper rooms, she used to be kept under restraint, so when this time she found herself outside, she must, of course, have felt the wish to go strolling all over the place in search of fun. How could she have ever had such a fiery disposition? But even admitting that she had such a temper, she was, after all, a stupid girl to do as she did; and she doesn't deserve any pity."
"In spite of what you say," sighed Madame Wang, shaking her head to and fro, "I really feel unhappy at heart."
"You shouldn't, aunt, distress your mind about it!" Pao-ch'ai smiled. "Yet, if you feel very much exercised, just give her a few more taels than you would otherwise have done, and let her be buried. You'll thus carry out to the full the feelings of a mistress towards her servant."
"I just now gave them fifty taels for her," pursued Madame Wang. "I also meant to let them have some of your cousin's new clothes to enshroud her in. But, who'd have thought it, none of the girls had, strange coincidence, any newly-made articles of clothing; and there were only that couple of birthday suits of your cousin Lin's. But as your cousin Lin has ever been such a sensitive child and has always too suffered and ailed, I thought it would be unpropitious for her, if her clothes were also now handed to people to wrap their dead in, after she had been told that they were given her for her birthday. So I ordered a tailor to get a suit for her as soon as possible. Had it been any other servant-girl, I could have given her a few taels and have finished. But Chin Ch'uan-erh was, albeit a servant-maid, nearly as dear to me as if she had been a daughter of mine."
Saying this, tears unwittingly ran down from her eyes.
"Aunt!" vehemently exclaimed Pao-ch'ai. "What earthly use is it of hurrying a tailor just now to prepare clothes for her? I have a couple of suits I made the other day and won't it save trouble were I to go and bring them for her? Besides, when she was alive, she used to wear my old clothes. And what's more our figures are much alike."
"What you say is all very well," rejoined Madame Wang; "but can it be that it isn't distasteful to you?"
"Compose your mind," urged Pao-ch'ai with a smile. "I have never paid any heed to such things."
As she spoke, she rose to her feet and walked away.
Madame Wang then promptly called two servants. "Go and accompany Miss Pao!" she said.
In a brief space of time, Pao-ch'ai came back with the clothes, and discovered Pao-yue seated next to Madame Wang, all melted in tears. Madame Wang was reasoning with him. At the sight of Pao-ch'ai, she, at once, desisted. When Pao-ch'ai saw them go on in this way, and came to weigh their conversation and to scan the expression on their countenances, she immediately got a pretty correct insight into their feelings. But presently she handed over the clothes, and Madame Wang sent for Chin Ch'uan-erh's mother, to take them away.
But, reader, you will have to peruse the next chapter for further details.
请欣赏:
请给我换一个看看！ 拜托，快把噪音停掉！我读累了，想听点音乐或者请来支歌曲！
【选集】红楼一春梦 |
|
|