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sfiawong2009-05-14 18:58:12

你好!

看你的網名,以為你的網內有棋玩.此博不同彼駁呀.

山城子2009-01-24 01:22:31

山城子给先生拜年——祝你春节愉快安康幸福吉祥!
同享一首七绝:
牛来鼠去岁将除,年味浓浓瑞雪铺。
做客故乡竟半年,亲情蜜意可成书。
2009-1-24晚上于故乡辽西

钓月2008-04-25 16:34:30

问好!

悠子2008-01-14 04:45:44

谢谢。 还没来得及问个好~

hepingdao2007-03-17 16:52:18

来问个好
cup of wine nihao

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俳句的5,7科学探悉(未完稿)

把过去写的两篇关于俳句稿先放在这里, 大家一起修改, 集体写作? 由此再來看看漢俳的對應開發. Kokho 君 及 Lake 君 為專家, 我這是為你們起個頭, 多提供寶貴意見吶。此文先在 诗的底层架构上着力, 诗意与禅意靠大家来写喽。

既有守旧者, 也需要创新的--

------------俳句的5,7科学“遐想“ -----------

先写一篇杂文。

《俳句》

三句的平面
五七律绝诗缺陷
原在四六间

奇妙的数字 5,7 (诗的空间与音高)

空间上, 晶体最低能量的排列说. 例以司诺克撞球的起局,红球的紧密排列,每一中间红球有6球环绕,每一边红球则有4球显, 或4球隐。物理上球面上的晶体排列,扳曲小三角形面组成的球面,各方会由于应力太大,会形成一串配位数为 5-7-5-7-..-5的缺陷以释放应力。详见下附, 撞球排列,[物理:球面上的晶体排列 ]。


       红
      红 红
     红 红 红
    红 红 红 红
   红 红 红 红 红


音高上, 5, 7 在八度音阶上的有趣现象,西方音乐体系采用的是7个白键和5个黑检所代表的12个音,两个毗邻键之间的音差是半个音高。 也就是,钢琴是十二平均律的典型乐器. 你可以想象五言,七言如同黑白键的排列,音频等比的递增 (比数为2开根 12 次). 十二平均律适合转调, 随人有些地方不自然,与和弦上有些限制.



《禅是半音》

宫、商、角、征、羽
Sa, Re, Ga, Ma, Pa, Dha, Ni
禅思日得半

另一半,其余得。
此处, 日为 日本, 亦为白日, 两义.

印度的音阶表示, sargam:Sa, Re, Ga, Ma, Pa, Dha, Ni (Do, Re, Mi, Fa, So, La, Ti ).
这种由“do-re-mi-fa-sol-la-ti-do” 构成的音阶叫作“自然音阶”(diatonic scale)而由12个音组成的音阶叫作“半音音阶”(chromatic scale)。五音”变征”相当于fa,”变宫”相当于si。

日本过往(明治维新前)因地缘故,孤独大洲海外,形成半音文化,常给正统以怪异惊奇(如同传统的日本半音变调音乐). 于今西方文化搜索互补,图全面之际(半音才是全面),日本这个半音天才常于某些处特能补正统所无(禅由中国传入日本,日本更传入西方); 就像 十二平均律的最早发明也在中国, 但总是没能发扬光大.这不能算文化沙文吧?阴阳二元论,是古代中国人世界观的基础。以阴阳二元观念去把握事物,是古代中国人思维方法。对联,对偶,平仄,起承转合,
偶数为自然(sonnet 亦暗符合偶数与起承转合)。中国律,绝诗五言,七言皆偶数句。三实为异数。如同击不中节; 但转而亦可辩说,禅在击节之外,在对仗之外,在起承转合之外;就像郭靖敲打黄药师吹箫一般(借金庸小说)。 转借一句,真是“‘三‘山‘半‘落青天外。“

苏东坡一首七言绝句,诗云:

“溪声尽是广长舌,山色无非清净身;
夜来八万四千偈,他日如何举似人?”

注:似人,后嗣、后学之意.

这里, 以偈诗论道悟禅,四句也成,但,说不可说,几句又何妨。
倒是在经济力量的推动下,俳句捷足先登。或许俳句,更适合手机短信,比起顺口溜”高级”一点. 静观。




附, 撞球排列之[物理:球面上的晶体排列 ]


ZT 自Tzu-Ming Lu

打一百年前,粒子如何在球面上形成最低能量的排列就一直是待解之谜。一直以来,科学家只用理论计算和计算机仿真来处理这个问题,而没有实验证明。最近雪城大 学Mark Bowick,哈佛大学David Nelson,艾荷华州立大学Alex Travesset等研究人员通力合作,设计了实验而利用显微镜实地观察到了微小粒子在水滴表面的排列情形。
在一个平面上,要得到多个粒子的最稳定排列其实非常直观而容易想象,就像排好的撞球一样,每个粒子外围各有6个粒子包围。

然而当平面换成 球面时,可就不那么简单了。在决定粒子排列的紧密程度时﹐通常是采用称为 disclination charge的参数,每个粒子的disclination charge定义为平面时配位数 (也就是6) 减去球面时的配位数;大数学家Euler证明了任何用小三角形面组成的球,必定会有12个disclination charge。不过这12个disclination charge会怎么分布,得看最低能量的粒子排列而定;该群科学家于2000年曾提出相关理论,而在最近设计了以下实验,以实际观察粒子到底怎么排列。
研究人员使用直径为1μm的聚苯乙烯小珠作为在球面上排列的粒子,将其吸附于不同大小的小水滴上,而小水滴又悬浮在甲苯氯苯的混合液中。之后再利用相差倒立显微镜 [注] 摄下各个水滴表面的粒子排列情形。
他们发现,当水滴半径R除以粒子距离a大约大于5时,原本独立在球面各方的disclination charge,会由于应力太大,会形成一串配位数为 5-7-5-7-..-5的缺陷以释放应力 (也就是disclination charge为 +1-1+1-1..+1,总和仍为1),而且随着这个比值愈大,为释放应力所额外形成的缺陷愈多。另外也发现,这些被称为“疤”(scar) 的链状缺陷,可以自由的中止在晶体中,而这是平面的晶体所不允许的。这些发现和理论相吻合。同时理论也预期这些排列方式和微观上粒子彼此的作用力大小没有 太大关系,而主要由 R/a的比值决定。
这些球面上的“疤”据推测应是化学活性较大的地方,这个发现极有可能应用在对付致病性的病毒和细菌。自然界中球状结构无所不在,某些病毒 和细菌的外壳即属于此种结构。想要对付它们,或许可以针对它们的“疤”的所在来设计特定的化学反应。另外许多奈米材料也是球状结构,了解这些“疤”的存在 将可以更容易掌握材料的特性。
注:相差倒立显微镜(Phase Contrast Inverted Microscope),利用光线通过观测物和原来光线有光程差,而增加影像的对比度。原理见:
http://www.nobel.se/physics/educational/microscopes/phase/

原始论文:
Grain Boundary Scars And Spherical Crystallography. Bausch et al. SCIENCE VOL 299, 1716-1718 14 MAR 2003


附,,五音

【宫】
  五音之一。通常相当于今首调唱名中的do音。“宫”音为五音之主、五音之君,统帅众音。《国语?周语下》曰:“夫宫,音之主也,第以及羽。”《礼记?乐记》曰:“宫为君、商为臣、角为民……”宋张炎《词源?五音相生》亦曰:“宫属土,君之象……宫,中也,居中央,畅四方,唱施始生,为四声之纲》。”宫调(式)又为众调(式)之“主”、之“君”,即就其今所谓之“调高”而言。《隋书?音乐志》云:“每宫应立五调”“牛弘遂因郑译之旧,又请依古‘五声五律’旋相为宫:‘雅乐’每宫但一调,惟‘迎气’奏五调,谓之‘五音’;‘缦乐’用七调……”此所谓“宫”,与“均”通。有以宫音为主音、结声构成的调(式)名。唐段安节《乐府杂录?别乐识五音轮二十八调图》曰:“宫七调第一运正宫调,……第六运仙吕宫,第七运黄钟宫。”张炎《词源》亦曰:“十二律吕各有五音,演而为宫为调……黄钟宫(均):黄钟宫(调式)、黄钟商(调式)、黄钟角(调式)、黄钟变(变征调式)、黄钟征(调式)、黄钟羽(调式)、黄钟闰(闰宫调式)。”

【商】
  五音之一。通常相当于今首调唱名中的re音。“商”音为五音第二级,居“宫”之次。古人认为,“商,属金,臣之象”,“臣而和之”。有以商音为主音、结声构成的调(式)名。如唐段安节的《乐府杂录?别乐识五音轮二十八调图》中的“入声商七调”。

【角】
  五音之一。通常相当于今首调唱名中的mi音。“角”为五音之第三级,居“商”之次。古人以为,“角属木,民之象”。有以角音为主音、结声构成的调(式)名。如唐段安节的《乐府杂录?别乐识五音轮二十八调图》中的“上声角七调”。在古代的调(式)中,有以角音为调之角调,或有以闰宫为角之角调。

【征】
五音之一。通常相当于今首调唱名中的sol音。“征”为五音之第四级,居“角”之次。古人以为,“征属火,事之象”。有以征音为主音、结声构成的调(式)名。

【羽】五音之一。通常相当于今首调唱名中的la音。“羽”为五音之第五级,居“征”之次。古人以为,“羽属水,物之象”。有以羽音为主音、结声构成的调(式)名。如唐段安节的《乐府杂录?别乐识五音轮二十八调图》中的“平声羽七调”。

【变征】
  古音阶中的“二变”之一。角音与征音之间的乐音。《史记?荆轲传》曰:“高渐离击筑,荆轲和歌,为变征之声,士皆垂泪涕泣。”宋人亦有称变为闰,曰闰征。在十二律,通常指较征音下一律之音(相当于#fa);也有较角音上一律之音(即清角,相当于fa),又《隋书?音乐志》引郑译与苏夔俱云“今……‘清乐’黄钟宫(均)以小吕(仲吕)为变征”。有以变征为主音、结声构成的调(式)名。《隋书?音乐志》记载,苏夔曰:“每宫(均)应立五调(式),不闻更加变宫、变征二调(式)为七调(式)。”郑译答之:“周有七音之律……今若不以‘二变’为调曲,则是冬夏声阙,四时不备。是故每宫(均)须立七调(式)。”众人从之。在宋张炎《词源?八十四调》十二宫(均)下,皆有七调(式),列“变征”之“调式”。

【变宫】
  古音阶中的“二变”之一。羽音与宫音之间的乐音。宋人有称其为“闰宫”者。在十二律,有指较宫音下一律之音(相当于si),如《后汉书?律历志》云:“黄钟为宫……应钟为变宫”;亦有较羽音上一律之音(相当于bsi),如《晋书?律历志》云“清角之调(音阶)以姑洗为宫,……太簇为变宫”。有以变宫为主音为结声构成的调(式)名。




-----------俳句的5,7科学“非遐想“-------------

五、七、五音的形式

日文在phonology是归属于‘音’(mora)的文字,而不是音节文字。 音节文字如英文,其CVC (consonant, vowel, consonant) 为一音节常态,不能对应到mora. 究其原因, 在V的长短,及结尾的C算几个音(mora).

例,cat, dog 为一单音节,但是为2音(2 morae);英文外来语(相对于日语)常会比原音节数多1,2个音 (e.g., first, second, toilet).
又例, 如日文中
“拗音”「しゃ」、「ちょ」及「りゅ」等则是两个字合为一个音,
如“记者(きしゃ)”算两个音,
而“长流(ちょうりゅう)”则算四个音。

中文为一音一字,字数对应到英文(或日文)并无音节(意义)上的底层相应关系。早期的英语日俳,多翻译在12-14音节之间为所接受,17音节被认为过于份丰富,失去俳的精神。西人研究俳者发现日俳的三行在朗诵上的时长是相当的,故有不少推崇每行两步的译者,2-3-2步的反而较少. 再下去的就有不仿拟日俳格式,而单取其精神, 创造适合英文的最短诗(自由俳).中文17字,则又常易丰富于英文17音节的意义含量。俳如金箔,精神是打造得精,薄, 轻却含金。下就"音,音节,重音"探讨三种俳句写法, 以俳问俳, 正是。

Haiku—Japan (mora based)

East West:
Mora syllable mixed--
Zeitgeist

Haiku—American (syllable based)

And Where East meets West:
Moras, syllables are mixed--
Resident Zeitgeist

Haiku—British (stress based)

East, West:
Morae, syllables--
What a Zeitgeist

Haiku—Chinese (what based)

。。。。
。。。。。。
。。。。

东方, 西方
音与音节通混
时代精神

个人以为,因为汉字每一音的意义丰富,形式上,最多不超过4-6-4才是较为合理的汉俳诗而符日俳精神,5-7-5字已过繁。这样说初看突兀,但洗澡时不妨再想一下。中国的成语,俗语,禅语有许多(如果不是大多)都是4,6字的,亦符合日俳的初始精神吧?写双语俳诗,死守着17,问题的产生自是合理地源诸音,音节及字的先天不同与限制上,不足为奇了。


转贴一文,此文涉及俳句的形式,音响及内容设计, 在西方的诗学基础上, 建入日俳的精神. 但这文还是没细区分音与音节, 其余皆可用. 我的意义就是说, 汉俳也可取同方法, 在汉诗学的基础上,建入排句的精神, 成为自己的诗体. 他山之石如下.

Line-length and syllables

In Japanese haiku have seventeen onji, or syllables, in groups of five, seven and five. The onji are less varied than our syllables ("Hello" is two, but takes less time to say than "thrust", "whinge" or "mourn"), though there is experimental evidence to show that the seven-syllable lines are said a little quicker and are exactly equivalent in time-value to the five syllable lines. All three lines are therefore, in one sense, of equal length, though the middle one is of greater density.

The line-lengths of five and seven onji are deeply rooted rhythmic units in Japanese, and have the highly memorable qualities of an English rhymed couplet. Slogans, advertising headlines, proverbs, witty sayings and all forms of traditional poetry are composed in these rhythmic units.

Translators have adopted different policies when searching for an English equivalent: some tried using rhyme (this did not catch on and is now a dead-end); some used a fuller four-line form which looked more like a native English quatrain, notably Noboyuki Yuasa who translated the Penguin Classics version of Basho's The Narrow Road to the Deep North (this did not catch on either). There are two styles which have survived: a small group of translators and writers reproduce the Japanese syllabic pattern exactly in English; and a much larger group keep the translations as minimal as possible, on the grounds that the striking features of haiku are shortness and spareness.

Two syllables, sometimes one, in a Japanese haiku are often spent on a kireji, or "cutting word," rendered in English by a punctuation mark. Fifteen or sixteen syllables remain. Some Japanese words may be shorter than ours, but on the whole they will be slightly less dense and the information in seventeen syllables can be translated in eight to twelve syllables, so there is a case for keeping English language haiku a little shorter than Japanese ones. But see Rhythm, below.

Basho came to the site of a famous battle. He knew the story of how Yoshitsune was heavily outnumbered but fought bravely and committed suicide after killing his own wife and children. That had happened five hundred years before. Basho wrote this haiku:

natsu-gusa ya / tsuwamono-domo-ga / yume no ato
summer grasses (:!) / strong ones' / dreams afterwards

All that remains of
those brave warriors' dreamings -
these summer grasses
(Basho, translated 5-7-5 syllables)

The most minimalist of all translators is the American poet Lucien Stryk. His version of the same haiku, in twelve syllables, is:

Summer grasses,
all that remains
of soldiers' dreams

Original haiku in English have also followed one of these two policies. "Strict form" haiku are written in 5-7-5 syllables, and the master of this approach is James Kirkup:

The pond's dark waters -
only stepping stones covered
with the first snowfall

"Free form" haiku are usually shorter than seventeen syllables, and while some writers retain a longer middle line:

Midnight lightning:
neighbour never seen before -
there, at her window
(Cicely Hill)

The branch he cuts
to make a donkey goad
still in bloom
(Cicely Hill)

some do not:

Just echoing boards
this empty house
where we laughed and cried
(James Norton)

Few cars today:

between each
what was before
(James Norton)

Rhythm
American speakers of English give fuller value to each syllable than British speakers do. Their tone is more even. British speakers emphasise some syllables, swallow others to nothing, and their sentences come out with lifts and dips like the flight of a sparrow. In consequence, American poets can make successful use of syllabics as the basis of a rhythm, and many have done so, but British poets have not. British speakers use a stress-patterned prosody.
The commentator who has been most influential in setting the form of the haiku in English has been William J. Higginson, an American and author of The Haiku Handbook. He has it both ways, defining the haiku by its number of stresses, or accented beats (seven, he says, with three in the middle line, following the opinion of the pioneeer translator R.H. Blyth), and syllables ("ten to twelve"). He compares the English-language haiku to a pentameter and a half, and says that this 'results in a sense of rhythmical incompleteness in English similar to the formal incompleteness of the traditional Japanese haiku (the Japanese haiku grew out of the first verse, or hokku, of a long poetic form). Higginson's given reason for settling on this form is that it "very nearly duplicates the traditional form of the Japanese haiku." A study by David Cobb of the poems published in contemporary American haiku magazines shows that they do indeed average eleven syllables, following Higginson's recommendation. British ones average fourteen and a half, but David Cobb does not think that there is much real difference in terms of "weight of content-words." He says, "I suspect a lot of the difference is accounted for by a greater willingness to dispose of articles and structural words."
Hideo Okada of Waseda University has pointed out that Japanese readers give the same amount of time to the middle seven-syllable line as to the shorter five-syllable lines when reading aloud. He states that each line contains two content words in two "rhythmic segments" and argues from this that, taking the basic unit of English prosody as the foot, the equivalent of a Japanese haiku is six feet (three lines of two segments each), not seven. He translates haiku with six stresses. He, like Higginson, justifies his policy because it most closely duplicates the form of the Japanese haiku.
Now that haiku have taken root in the West and are being written in English the issue is no longer, "How closely can we duplicate the Japanese practice?" The task now is to develop an appropriate form in our language for the shortest poem, in the spirit of haiku. It seems to me that American English, being syllabic, may diverge from British English in solving the form-question for haiku. The American answer may be defined in syllables. The British answer is: six stresses.
It is a happy coincidence that my view is the same as Hideo Okada's, because the reasoning is different. Mine is based upon the notion, at first sight paradoxical, of a 'natural' English haiku length, known to the ear. This is an entirely practical and instinctive judgement, not in the least theoretical. It just seems to me that seven-stress haiku are wearisomely overloaded. They gain enormously in the quality of "lightness" (karumi), which Basho valued so highly in his last years, if cut to six.
Compare the slightly different middle lines of these two translations. It seems to me that the Blyth has an ungainly and distracting movement because of the extra stress:
Fields and mountains -
the snow has taken them all,
nothing remains
(Joso, trans. Blyth)
Fields and mountains
all taken by snow;
nothing remains
(Joso, trans. Horioka, amended George Marsh)
The Blyth long middle line forces two pauses into the poem, instead of one break at the end of line two.

Seven-stress poems of the kind that Higginson recommends are too lumpy and indigestible in English, and Higginson in practice translates using fewer stresses. Even Blyth very rarely uses the seven stresses he theoretically demands. He has a wonderful feel for haiku and overwhelmingly translates them with six (or five) stresses:
The silence;
The voice of the cicadas
Penetrates the rocks.
(Basho, trans. Blyth)
The ideal English haiku will not set up a rhythm that is anything like a ballad fourteener or quatrain of any kind. Its length is a matter of avoiding these echoes from our commonest poetic forms. Here the three lines are crucial: four does remind one of rhyming quatrains. It must also avoid setting up a rhythm that carries the expectation of more: it is complete in one breathunit. It is a new thing. In that sense we have the advantage of the Japanese, because we do not see the haiku as a truncated renga; it is a shaped breath in silence.

If one has a sense of the length of a haiku line as two stresses, and I think one does, then the occasional three-stress line is very effective as a rhythmic variation:
unable to sleep
the clank and rumble of trains
long into the night
(Brian Tasker)
and the occasional one-stress line has a lot of extra room and karumi, because it expands to fill the space of the line:
On bare branches
two grey doves
fluffed up
(Francine Plunkett)
One must not forget the power of the "rest" or silence in the poem, usually at the caesura (the pause in the middle, usually, in a haiku, at the end of line one or line two), but also often at the end, giving the poem a sort of after-life because the expected sixth beat is silent. This is Lucien Stryk translating Basho:
Atop the mushroom –
who knows from where –
a leaf!
The Shortness of Haiku
A haiku is the smallest language construct that can generate enough complexity to create tension and resonance between its parts and take on symbolic power. Filling seventeen syllables with rhythmic ornament or verbal elaboration is a mistake. The haiku should be as short as it can be, with no fat.

Connaire Kensit argues that the right syllable counts in the English language to approximate to the Japanese original would be 3-4-3, making ten in total. In practice, given that English requires a fixed word-order, this is too inflexible a form for most subjects, so he recommends a pattern of 4-5-4, making a total of thirteen syllables.

My recommendation, for the reasons given above, would be for three two-stressed lines, as short and plain as possible, making six stresses in all.

Higginson recommended seven stresses.

Kirkup recommends strict-form haiku of seventeen syllables, 5-7-5.

Ueda translates using four lines, for three reasons: "The language of haiku … is based on colloquialism, and in my opinion, the closest approximation of natural conversational rhythm can be achieved in English by a four-line stanza … In my opinion a three-line stanza does not carry adequate dignity and weight to compare with hokku … I had before me the task of translating a great number of poems and I found it impossible to use three-line form consistently."

Miyamori, in 1932, translated using "two lines of iambic verse" or "two lines of trochaic verse." His version of the one you have seen (starting "My way …" in my translation) starts trochaic and then goes iambic:
None goes along this way
But I, this autumn eve.
(Basho, translated Miyamori)
But note that it has six stresses and twelve syllables, very like the short three-liners in common use now.

Take your pick.!

Sound effects - Onomatopoeia

More Japanese words than English ones are onomatopoeic, and numbers of Japanese haiku have sound effects in them broad enough to be appreciated even by people like me who know nothing of the language. The sound of crickets whispering or murmuring, in a modern haiku by Koji, is given as "bosoboso."

Alliteration and assonance are used to enact effects. Basho has a line (in a poem about drinking freezing water from a spring) about the feeling of tingling in the teeth, setting the teeth on edge, which seems to me as good in English as it is in Japanese: "haya ha ni hibiku."

Basho’s
natsu-gusa ya / tsuwamono-domo-ga / yume no ato
summer grasses (:!) / strong ones’ / dreams’ site

All that remains of
Those brave warriors’ dreamings –
These summer grasses.
is praised by Donald Keene for its astonishing pattern of ahs, oohs and ohs with only one e. Certainly, the middle line, even to an English ear with no knowledge of Japanese, sounds thrillingly military, like a snare drum leading the marching!

A poem that enacts the precarious balance of the subject in the poem is Anita Virgil's:
Walking the snow-crust
not sinking
sinking
Clever use of pace can give a sound-picture of movement, as in these two haiku by Martin Lucas:
the new year's blossom;
a hedgesparrow hops on a
moss-covered grave

from leafless trees
crow follows crow
into a cold wind
Lines 1, 2 and 3

It seems to me that the last line of a haiku dominates emotionally, and the first two intellectually, in that they identify the subject. Take Michael Gunton's haiku
wintry sun
over the deserted funfair
a gull, soaring
in which the "soaring" dominates the emotional tone, lifting one at the end. If one reverses the lines:
a gull, soaring
over the deserted funfair -
wintry sun
the soaring gull recedes and the mixed bleak effect of "deserted" and "wintry sun" dominates. One more example from Michael Gunton:
under a bare tree
a few mauve crocuses
quiver in the wind

The last line zooms in on the aliveness and delicacy of the crocuses.
Move it, and the effect is quite different:

quivering in the wind
a few mauve crocuses
under a bare tree

A ballad stanza has new information in lines one and three, and the punchy ending on the rhyme word in line four, which leaves the writer free to do anything that prepares the rhyme in line two. Line two can be slack. The rhythm and the rhyme are so strong that they sweep the reader through line two. There is no equivalent spaciousness in the haiku. If any of the three lines goes slack, then the haiku cannot easily recover its energy. A slack last line is fatal. The haiku is essentially one quick statement, so there is no room for digressions or distractions. Too much information - just one word too many - is a distraction, and can easily dissipate the effect.

Haiku can have the main subject at the beginning, in the middle or at the end. It is commonest, however, to set the scene with the first line or two (the Where and the When), and then give the subject (the What). The first two lines can be apparently plain (though they must be tight, not slack with spare adjectives and over-elaboration), and as there is syntactical suspense - we are waiting for the subject - the tension is maintained. But then the subject, if the rest of the haiku is plain, has something surprising about it:

At sunset
in the stubble field
a heron's blue
(James Norton)
In many haiku, like the one above, the verb is implicit, but I have sometimes found that the answer to the problem of energy failing in a description is the right verb at the end of line two or beginning of line three:
between the ribs
of the broken boat
rises the moonlit tide
(George Marsh)

2007-08-31 22:54:43
引用并回复
Lake ?2007-09-01 19:26:01?? 引用并回复


嘿,洋洋洒洒。要先消化,才能发言。
要先弄懂五音和物理撞球之原理,我这辈子就甭写了。 Sad

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博弈 ?2007-09-02 00:29:19?? 引用并回复


Lake 写到:
嘿,洋洋洒洒。要先消化,才能发言。
要先弄懂五音和物理撞球之原理,我这辈子就甭写了。 Sad


你只管寫, 詩的存在是有道理的. 那跨時空的集體下意識, 科學與音樂應該也是吧. 我吧5,7的跨度加以回顧並延伸, 還不知會走到哪呢?

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Lake ?2007-09-03 17:47:51?? 引用并回复


乱弹 乱弹 cat 不着边际

五、七言是从四、六言发展出来的。早期的五言是在四字的句子中加一“兮”字,其作用是一个音符,但还不能说是五言诗句,直到“兮”字被换上一个有意义的实字,于是才成为五言诗句。

现把玩一下《俳句》

《俳句》

三句的平面
五七律绝诗缺陷
原在四六间

用“兮”字替换掉每行中的一个字

三句兮平面
五七律绝兮缺陷
原在四六兮

再将“兮”字去掉,变为4-6-4

三句平面
五七律绝缺陷
原在四六

看来意思并没缺少。
但据说,偶数诗句合乐音调单调呆板,不适合于吟哦,只能供朗诵用。故而兴起了新的诗歌句式,诗句字数不从偶数发展,而从奇数发展,随后有了五言、七言。

cat

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杨光 ?2007-09-03 22:00:55?? 引用并回复


这个生疏,先学习

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博弈 ?2007-09-05 22:59:16?? 引用并回复


Lake 写到:
乱弹 乱弹 cat 不着边际

五、七言是从四、六言发展出来的。早期的五言是在四字的句子中加一“兮”字,其作用是一个音符,但还不能说是五言诗句,直到“兮”字被换上一个有意义的实字,于是才成为五言诗句。

现把玩一下《俳句》

《俳句》

三句的平面
五七律绝诗缺陷
原在四六间

用“兮”字替换掉每行中的一个字

三句兮平面
五七律绝兮缺陷
原在四六兮

再将“兮”字去掉,变为4-6-4

三句平面
五七律绝缺陷
原在四六

看来意思并没缺少。
但据说,偶数诗句合乐音调单调呆板,不适合于吟哦,只能供朗诵用。故而兴起了新的诗歌句式,诗句字数不从偶数发展,而从奇数发展,随后有了五言、七言。

cat


很有意思, 一個兮字, 改變了時長, 並增加意境.

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