| 白水 大学士
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-10-02
 帖子: 14102
 来自: TORONTO
 白水北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2006-10-28 06:19:28    发表主题: Great Dinner<盛宴> |   |  
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				| <Great Dinner> 
 
 Deep autumn to the poets,
 the season seems defoliated
 with its colours damaged
 to personify their sobs and sorrow
 
 Walking along the path, I am
 listening to the wind
 in the rain.
 
 Well, my poet
 if your desire is as thin
 as a piece of paper
 do you wish to write about that
 or the pallor of nobleness
 or the extensions of imagined illness?
 
 I have
 cake to ease my hunger
 as I type these words for you
 a great dinner
 is the bright moon
 with twinkling stars
 
 <盛宴>
 
 深秋, 好象是专门留给诗人的
 一些落叶, 一些残红
 恰到好处的
 掩盖着你的悲凉
 和低泣
 我漫步街头
 沐雨听风
 
 其实诗人
 如果真的当你所有的
 企求都薄成了
 一张纸
 那些无病呻吟
 那些贵族的苍白
 还顾及点墨吗?
 
 我抓起最后一只烧饼
 填充辘辘饥肠
 然后悠闲的在键盘上敲
 最丰盛的晚宴
 莫过
 皓洁的月
 洒满晶莹的星星
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		| 和平岛 举人
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-05-25
 帖子: 1277
 来自: Victoria, Canada
 和平岛北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2006-11-05 18:42:02    发表主题: Re: Great Dinner<盛宴> |   |  
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				| just made some editing may not be appropriate:
 
 Deep autumn to poets,
 the season seems just some defoliations
 with colours damaged
 to hide their sob and upset
 
 Walking on the street, I am
 listening to the wind
 under the rain
 
 Well, my poet
 if your desire is as thin as a piece of paper
 do you still want to write about that?
 such as pallor of nobleness
 Or just make a fuss on an imaginary illness
 
 I hold the last cake to fill my hunger
 then, type these words using my keyboard:
 a great dinner
 is the bright moon
 with crystalloid stars
 _________________
 写诗是为了写更好的诗
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		| 白水 大学士
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-10-02
 帖子: 14102
 来自: TORONTO
 白水北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2006-11-05 20:04:30    发表主题: |   |  
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				| thank you for your edit. i will think it earnesstly |  | 
	
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		| 白水 大学士
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-10-02
 帖子: 14102
 来自: TORONTO
 白水北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2006-11-11 16:44:15    发表主题: |   |  
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				| 此诗歌贴到西人网站, 他们又改了点. 感觉读起来更顺些, 只是和中文意思远了点, 先存这儿吧, 以后再试. Deep autumn to the poets,
 the season seems defoliation
 with its colours damaged
 to personify their sobs and upset.
 
 Walking on the street, I am
 listening to wind
 past rain.
 
 Well, my poet
 if your desire is thin
 as a piece of paper
 do you wish to write of that
 or the nobleness of pallor
 or extensions of imagined illness?
 
 I have
 cake to ease my hunger
 as I type these words for you
 a great dinner
 
 is the moon
 set with diademic  stars
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		| kokho 进士出身
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-11-30
 帖子: 2642
 来自: Singapore
 kokho北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2006-12-05 13:03:22    发表主题: |   |  
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				| 喜欢  和平岛的  :)) 
 
 。。
 _________________
 乒乓、摄影、诗歌
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		| 白水 大学士
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-10-02
 帖子: 14102
 来自: TORONTO
 白水北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2006-12-05 17:16:38    发表主题: |   |  
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				| KOKHO, ARE YOU SUER PEACE'S IS BETTER THAN OTHER(I MEAN THAT IS NOT MY)?  |  | 
	
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		| kokho 进士出身
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-11-30
 帖子: 2642
 来自: Singapore
 kokho北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2006-12-06 11:00:07    发表主题: |   |  
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				| I am listening to wind past rain. 
 do you wish to write of that
 or the nobleness of pallor
 or extensions of imagined illness?
 
 这几句很可能有问题 。。
 _________________
 乒乓、摄影、诗歌
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		| 白水 大学士
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-10-02
 帖子: 14102
 来自: TORONTO
 白水北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2006-12-06 18:25:57    发表主题: |   |  
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				| 
 
	  | kokho 写到: |  
	  | I am listening to wind past rain. 
 do you wish to write of that
 or the nobleness of pallor
 or extensions of imagined illness?
 
 这几句很可能有问题 。。
 |  
 THANKS, I WILL THINK IT CONSCIENTIOUSLY
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		| 白水 大学士
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-10-02
 帖子: 14102
 来自: TORONTO
 白水北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2006-12-13 19:30:41    发表主题: |   |  
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				| KOK, 我请教了我的英文老师, 正好她也喜欢诗歌, 还出了诗集. 她帮着改了点. 你说的没错, 老师说PEACE改的那首IS PERFECT.  ANYWAY, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. 
 Deep autumn to the poets,
 the season seems defoliated
 with its colours damaged
 to personify their sobs and sorrow
 
 Walking on the street, I am
 listening to the wind
 in the rain.
 
 Well, my poet
 if your desire is as thin
 as a piece of paper
 do you wish to write about that
 or the pallor of nobleness
 or the extensions of imagined illness?
 
 I have
 cake to ease my hunger
 as I type these words for you
 a great dinner
 is the bright moon
 with diademic twinkling stars
 |  | 
	
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		| kokho 进士出身
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-11-30
 帖子: 2642
 来自: Singapore
 kokho北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2006-12-13 20:20:53    发表主题: |   |  
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				| 
 
	  | 引用: |  
	  | Walking on the street |  
 女人写诗,不要佣这样的句子 ;))
 
 Strolling down the street
 
 去看看 www.dictionary.com
 
 每个字查查意思才用。英文字有的是中性的,有的带着情绪,或褒贬 :))
 
 。。
 _________________
 乒乓、摄影、诗歌
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		| 白水 大学士
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-10-02
 帖子: 14102
 来自: TORONTO
 白水北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2006-12-13 20:33:04    发表主题: |   |  
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				| 
 
	  | kokho 写到: |  
	  | 
 
	  | 引用: |  
	  | Walking on the street |  
 女人写诗,不要佣这样的句子 ;))
 
 Strolling down the street
 
 去看看 www.dictionary.com
 
 每个字查查意思才用。英文字有的是中性的,有的带着情绪,或褒贬 :))
 
 。。
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 WHAT DO YOUR MEAN? WHICH ONE I CAN'T WRITE IT? Walking on the street OR Strolling down the street? BUT I DIDN'T WRITE "Strolling down the street" IN THE POME. SENT MAIL TO ME A.S.A.P. PLEASE.
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		| kokho 进士出身
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-11-30
 帖子: 2642
 来自: Singapore
 kokho北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2006-12-13 20:59:37    发表主题: |   |  
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				| 
 
	  | 月光 写到: |  
	  | 
 
	  | kokho 写到: |  
	  | 
 
	  | 引用: |  
	  | Walking on the street |  
 女人写诗,不要佣这样的句子 ;))
 
 《》《》《》《》《》
 
 Strolling down the street
 
 去看看 www.dictionary.com
 
 每个字查查意思才用。英文字有的是中性的,有的带着情绪,或褒贬 :))
 
 。。
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 WHAT DO YOUR MEAN? WHICH ONE I CAN'T WRITE IT? Walking on the street OR Strolling down the street? BUT I DIDN'T WRITE "Strolling down the street" IN THE POME. SENT MAIL TO ME A.S.A.P. PLEASE.
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 在英文里面,WOMAN WHO WALK THE STREET
 有特别的意思
    _________________
 乒乓、摄影、诗歌
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		| 白水 大学士
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-10-02
 帖子: 14102
 来自: TORONTO
 白水北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2006-12-14 15:10:55    发表主题: |   |  
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				| I CHANGED A LITTLE.   
 Deep autumn to the poets,
 the season seems defoliated
 with its colours damaged
 to personify their sobs and sorrow
 
 Walking along the path, I am
 listening to the wind
 in the rain.
 
 Well, my poet
 if your desire is as thin
 as a piece of paper
 do you wish to write about that
 or the pallor of nobleness
 or the extensions of imagined illness?
 
 I have
 cake to ease my hunger
 as I type these words for you
 a great dinner
 is the bright moon
 with twinkling stars
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		| 奇武 童生
 
 
 注册时间: 2009-05-17
 帖子: 1
 来自: D.C.
 奇武北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2009-05-17 11:01:23    发表主题: Needs some work |   |  
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				| Late into autumn, With fading shades,
 And floating leaves.
 A heavenly time,
 For a poem.
 
 。。。 。。。
 
 秋来安湖
 
 是秋天不凉,
 是春草不绿,
 信步安湖边,
 喜见群鱼嬉水欢,
 
 歌之,唱之,
 舞之, 蹈之。
 
 逆流而上不是难,
 北极冬至不为愁。
 
 天国奖与欢喜日,
 江河湖海任自游,
 何问是春还是秋。
 _________________
 奇武
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