Maple Review Home
   Chinese Literature Society of North America | Maple Review | Immigrants in Canada | Angel Studio | The Driftwood Artist Society | Ocean of Poetry | Island of Music
"HuaHe Cup" 2007 Chinese Mainland and Oversea Poetry Competition and Non-governmental Magazines and Newspapers Joint Exhibition starts on the first day of 2007.
  
 FAQFAQ   SearchSearch   MemberlistMemberlist   UsergroupsUsergroups   RegisterRegister  ProfileProfile    Log in to check your private messagesLog in to check your private messages   Sign inSign in   BlogsBlogs    Weblogs NewsWeblogs News   AlbumAlbum 
English Home Bilingual Home Chinese Home
Dictionary Check Poems' Rules & Forms Search for Chinese Poems Poetry & Music

Maple Review Home -> 西方文学 Western Literature Post new topic   Reply to topic
The poem for you
白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2011-01-02 15:55:37    Post subject: The poem for you Reply with quote

The poem for you

(1)
Do you really want to know the truth ?
yes, I was crying, after I read your message

the new year just came, why are you so upset?
please look
look at me, look deep into the brown eyes
under the cover
to find a fountain
it will clean your distress

(2)
I'd like to say
my favourite flower is a snowflake
look, look at her
in the chilly winter
she buries the death of late autumn
by using her white soul

when birds awaken the spring flowers
she drifts away with a sweet smile

(3)
You never mind two-penny compliment
no matter you have gotten it or not
everyday, your sweat waters an apple tree
just wait
wait for the apples falling down into children's hands
how wonderful a dream
you hide in the heart
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
qinghongh
榜眼


Joined: 14 Oct 2007
Posts: 4110

qinghonghCollection
PostPosted: 2011-01-02 17:08:04    Post subject: Reply with quote

(2)
I'd like to say
my favourite flower is a snowflake
look, look at her
in the chilly winter
she buries the death of late autumn
by using her white soul

when birds awaken the spring flowers
she drifts away with a sweet smile


If it is already the winter,
buries or buried?
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
William Zhou周道模
探花


Joined: 10 Jun 2007
Posts: 3950
Location: 中国四川广汉
William Zhou周道模Collection
PostPosted: 2011-01-02 17:33:29    Post subject: Reply with quote

深沉、新颖、过目不忘的诗句:

my favourite flower is a snowflake

she buries the death of late autumn

by using her white soul
_________________
诗歌是灵魂的歌唱.
周道模
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog Visit poster's website
Lake
举人


Joined: 09 Jan 2007
Posts: 1286

LakeCollection
PostPosted: 2011-01-02 18:29:10    Post subject: Reply with quote

"wait the apples falling down in children's hands "

wait for the apples...

"she buries the death of late autumn
by using her white soul "

with her ...
_________________
the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2011-01-02 21:00:54    Post subject: Reply with quote

qinghongh wrote:
(2)
I'd like to say
my favourite flower is a snowflake
look, look at her
in the chilly winter
she buries the death of late autumn
by using her white soul

when birds awaken the spring flowers
she drifts away with a sweet smile


If it is already the winter,
buries or buried?
...


Hi, qinghonh, thank you very much for you read it carefully. I think the snowflake have to bury the death of late autumn again and again. sorry, just joking Wink
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2011-01-02 21:04:12    Post subject: Reply with quote

William Zhou周道模 wrote:
深沉、新颖、过目不忘的诗句:

my favourite flower is a snowflake

she buries the death of late autumn

by using her white soul

...


Hi, William
Thanks for your encorengment
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2011-01-02 21:10:30    Post subject: Reply with quote

Lake wrote:
"wait the apples falling down in children's hands ".

wait for the apples...

"she buries the death of late autumn
by using her white soul "

with her ...
_________________

...


Hi, Lake

Thank you for the suggestion, a poem can use different words to describe, maybe we could keep both.
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
Lake
举人


Joined: 09 Jan 2007
Posts: 1286

LakeCollection
PostPosted: 2011-01-03 07:06:22    Post subject: Reply with quote

白水 Moonlight wrote:

a poem can use different words to describe,


同意。

我的建议只是想弄得更好,如果没有理解错的话。

‘with her white soul' 比 ’by using her white soul' 简洁。 少了一个词,少了两个音节。

通常说 wait for something to happen...
除非这里是其它的意思。
_________________
the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2011-01-03 16:00:03    Post subject: Reply with quote

问好Lake,非常感谢你认真的切磋与探讨, 这对提高我们的写作水平很有帮助。同时也非常感谢peace, qinghongh,William,戴玨及其他朋友和老师给与的帮助与鼓励。诗歌于我,只是玩儿,而论坛于我, 是写字板,更是友情的存储箱, 它保存着你们的这些宝贵的建议,探讨与鼓励。今后回首,当是美好的回忆。

新年快乐Very Happy
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
hepingdao
Site Admin


Joined: 25 May 2006
Posts: 8106

hepingdaoCollection
PostPosted: 2011-01-03 19:50:07    Post subject: Reply with quote

happy new year
Very Happy
_________________
为网友服务: 端茶倒水勤打扫!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Blog
白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2011-01-03 21:01:22    Post subject: Reply with quote

you too Very Happy
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2011-01-09 08:46:19    Post subject: teacher's suggestion Reply with quote

The poem for you

(1)
Do you really want to know the truth?
Yes, I was crying, after I read your message
the new year just came, why are you so upset?
please look
look at me, look deep into the brown eyes
under the cover
to find a fountain
It will clean your distress

(2)
I'd like to say
my favourite flower is a snowflake
look, look at her
in the chilly winter
she buries the death of late autumn
by using her white soul

when birds awaken the spring flowers
she drifts away with a sweet smile

(3)
You never mind a two-cent compliment
no matter if you have received it or not
everyday, your sweet waters an apple tree
just wait
wait the apples are falling down into children's hands
What a wonderful dream
you hide in the heart
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
连南河
秀才


Joined: 30 Aug 2008
Posts: 342
Location: Toronto
连南河Collection
PostPosted: 2011-02-06 06:56:29    Post subject: Reply with quote

A WONDERFUL DREAM WITH POEM!

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!
_________________
一路雨丝一路风
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2011-02-09 17:34:20    Post subject: Reply with quote

连南河 wrote:
A WONDERFUL DREAM WITH POEM!

HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR!


Hi, happy new year Very Happy

Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
宁家珍
秀才


Joined: 20 May 2009
Posts: 470
Location: 中国黄山
宁家珍Collection
PostPosted: 2011-02-10 06:21:58    Post subject: Reply with quote

(2)
I'd like to say
my favourite flower is a snowflake
look, look at her
in the chilly winter
she buries the death of late autumn
by using her white soul

when birds awaken the spring flowers
she drifts away with a sweet smile


How delightful the poem is!
Happy New Year!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail
白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2011-02-12 20:46:56    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thanks, happy new year. Very Happy

Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
Display posts from previous:   
Emoticons
Very Happy Smile Sad Surprised
Shocked Confused Cool Laughing
Mad Razz Embarassed Crying or Very sad
Evil or Very Mad Twisted Evil Rolling Eyes Wink
Exclamation Question Idea Arrow
View more Emoticons
Page 1 of 1           View previous topic View next topic    
Maple Review Home -> 西方文学 Western Literature    Post new topic   Reply to topic
Jump to:  


Once you post your works here, that means you submits them to the magazine of Maple Review (North American Maple, or BeiMeiFeng), a bilingual journal published by Chinese Literature Society of North America. The magazine holds the right to translate them into Chinese, and publish them in both languages. You need to be responsible for the copyright issues of your own files uploaded.
Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2005 phpBB Group
phpBB Chinese interface was translated by iCy-fLaME