短篇小说 》 霧 Fog 》
霧 Fog
蒲寧 Ivan Bunin
Fog
今天是我們航海的第二天。拂曉時，我們遇到了大霧，霧湮沒了地平綫，似煙籠一般遮蔽了桅桿，徐徐地在我們四圍彌漫開去，同灰蒙蒙的海和灰蒙蒙的天融成了一體。雖說還是鼕季，可連日來天氣一直暖和得出奇。高加索山脈上的積雪已開始融化，海洋也已吐出開春時節的大量水氣。在混沌初開的破曉時分，輪機突然停了，旅客被這突如其來的停車，被警笛聲和甲板上雜沓的腳步聲驚醒了過來，一個個睡眼惺鬆、凍得瑟瑟發抖、驚惶不安地聚集到艙面室來，七嘴八舌地議論著。一縷縷的霧，活象一綹綹灰白的頭髮，晃晃悠悠地貼着輪船飄忽而過。
我記得，起初這引起了極大的驚恐。艏樓上幾乎一刻不停地敲着信號鐘。煙囪喘着粗氣，迸發出令人膽寒的吼聲；大傢都呆若木雞地望着越來越濃重的霧。霧忽而擴散，忽而收縮，象滾滾的濃煙似地飄來浮去。有時，迷霧把輪船團團裹住，以致我們相互都覺得對方好似在昏天黑地之中移動的幽靈。這種陰森森的景象，使人覺得仿佛置身在秋日蕭瑟的黃昏，陰濕的寒氣凍得你直打哆嗦，自己也感到臉都發青了。後來，霧略略開了些，濃淡也均勻了些，也就是說，不再那麽殺機四伏了。輪船又開動了，然而行駛得非常膽怯，連輪機轉動引起的顫抖也幾乎是無聲的，船不停地敲響着信號鐘，離海岸越來越遠，徑直朝着南方駛去。那邊，真正的夜色，那象陰鬱的黑頁岩一般重濁的顔色，已潑滿濃霧彌漫的天際。使人覺得，在那邊，兩步之外就是世界的盡頭了，再過去便是叫人顫慄的廣袤的荒漠。打橫桁上、門檐上、纜索上落下一滴滴水珠。從煙囪裏飛出來的濕漉漉的煤粒，象黑雨一般下到煙囪的四周。真想看看清楚在那陰森森的遠方有些什麽東西，哪怕看到一件東西也好，然而霧包圍着我，它就象夢，使聽覺和視覺都遲鈍了。輪船好似一艘飛艇，眼前是灰蒙蒙的混沌世界，睫毛上挂着冰冷的如蛛絲一般的水氣，在離我不遠的地方，有個水手一邊抽煙，一邊咬着又濕又鹹的小鬍髭，我有時覺得他仿佛是夢中的人……到傍晚六點鐘的時候，我們又都走出艙房。
桅桿上那盞電燈突然透過迷霧射出了亮光，遠遠望去，活象是人的一隻眼睛。從又粗又短的煙囪裏莊嚴地噴出一團團黑煙，低低地懸在空中。艏樓上，毫無必要地單調地敲響着信號鐘，不知在哪裏，“強音霧笛”正在陰森森地、凄厲地鳴叫……也許實際上並沒有什麽強音霧笛，這衹是由於緊張過度而造成的聽覺上的錯覺。在漫無涯際的神秘的霧海之中，耳朵往往會覺得有什麽東西在鳴響……晦暗溟朦的霧越來越阻鬱了。在高處它同蒼茫的天空融合在一起。在低處則在輪船的四周踟躕，幾乎都要貼到在船的兩側輕微拍濺着的海水。鼕日漫漫的長夜降臨了。憂悒的白晝害得大傢無時無刻不在等待海難，人人都因此而精疲力竭了。為了補償白天所受的驚嚇，乘客們和水手一起擠在飯廳裏。輪船外已是伸手不見五指的黑夜，可是輪船內，我們這個小小的世界裏卻明亮、熱鬧、人頭擠擠。人們打撲剋，飲茶，喝酒，侍者川流不息地在酒櫃和飯桌間來來去去，乒乒乓乓地打開着瓶塞。我躺在下邊的臥艙裏，聽着頭頂上雜沓的腳步聲。不知是誰彈起了鋼琴，奏出了一支旋律憂傷得有點做作的流行的華爾茲舞麯，於是我也想跟大夥兒一起去熱鬧熱鬧，便穿好衣服，走出了臥艙。
那天晚上，所有的人大概都很愉快。至少我覺得是這樣，我們很高興可以如此無憂無慮地度過今宵。大傢都把迷霧和危險拋置腦後，盡情地跳着舞，唱着歌，眼睛炯炯放光。後來，大傢終於纍了，想去睡覺了……於是寬大、悶熱、空氣混濁、燈光已亮得有點病態的飯廳內，人終於漸漸走空。等到半小時後，那兒就象船上絶大多數地方一樣，已經一片漆黑。間或從甲板上傳來當當的鐘聲，在萬籟俱寂的時刻，這鐘聲聽來非常恐怖。後來鐘聲也越來越稀疏，越來越稀疏了……萬匯仿佛都已死去。
我沿着走廊，走到了下甲板，在艙面室裏背靠着冰涼的大理石墻，坐了一會兒……突然，連艙面室的電燈也熄了，我頓時成了瞎子。我在心裏哼着這天晚上人們唱的歌麯和彈奏的樂麯，摸黑走到梯子跟前，踏着梯級，朝上甲板走去，可纔走了幾級，腳就不由得站停了，月夜的美麗和憂傷震懾了我。
啊，這是個多麽奇異的夜晚呀！時光已經很晚，大概不消多久便要拂曉。就在我們剛纔唱歌、喝酒、嘻嘻哈哈地講着廢話的當兒，在這裏。在這個我們所不理解的，由太空、迷霧和海洋匯成的世界中，那溫柔、孤單、始終鬱鬱寡歡的月亮冉冉地升了起來，讓幽深的子夜籠罩萬匯……就跟五千年前，一萬年前一模一樣……霧緊緊地箍住我們，叫人看看也毛骨悚然。在迷霧中央，就象某個神秘的魅影那樣，殘夜的一輪黃澄澄的月亮一面嚮南方墜落，一面呆定地停滯在蒼白的夜幕上，好似人的眼睛，從光暈構成的嚮四周遠遠擴散開去的巨大的眼眶中俯視着人間，為輪船照出一個圓圓的深邃的孔道。這圓形孔道中具有着某種《啓示錄》式的東西……同時，某種不屬人間的、永遠沉默的奧秘存在於這墳墓般的岑寂中，――存在於今天的整個長夜中，存在於輪船中，存在於月亮中，此刻月亮正近得驚人地緊挨着海面，以惆悵而又冷漠的表情直視着我的臉龐。
我慢慢地走完梯子最上邊的幾級，倚身在欄桿上。整條輪船都在我腳下了。戳出在船體外的木頭舷橋上和甲板上。東一灘西一灘長長的水跡。閃爍出昏暗的光，――這是濃霧的殘痕。欄桿、纜索和長凳投下象蛛絲一般輕盈的煙色的陰影。輪船、煙囪和輪機都顯示出它們的中央是極其沉重的，是十分穩固的，而一根根欄桿則高聳入雲，在那裏晃動。但是整條輪船卻仍然給人以輕盈感。活象一個化作輪船的勻稱有緻的幽靈，駐足在蒼白的月光掀開一綫霧幕而露出的孔道上。海水低低地臥在右舷外，平坦得幾無一絲波紋。它，那海水，神秘地、悄無聲息搖晃着，流入浴滿月光的似輕煙一般的迷霧之中，閃爍出粼粼的波光，活象是無數忽隱忽現的金蛇。可是這閃光在離我二十步外就漸漸消失，再遠些衹能隱隱約約地看到了，變得就象失去了光澤的死人的眼睛。我舉目仰望，重又覺得這輪月亮是某個神秘的魅影所變幻成的蒼白的形象，而這無邊的寂靜則是一種奧秘，這種奧秘有一部分是我們永無可能認識，永無可能索解的……
驀地裏，艄樓上響起了信號鐘。鐘聲悲涼地一陣緊接着一陣，打破了深夜的寂靜，就在同時，從前方傳來了忙亂的喧聲和話語聲。剎時間，我預感到即將發生什麽危險，便睜大眼睛，緊盯着昏暗的霧，突然，一盞血紅的信號燈好似一顆巨大的紅寶石，在迷霧中越升越高，迅速地嚮我們移近。在信號燈下，一排燈火通明的舷窗象是一長串晦暗的金色斑點，一面在水氣中漫漶開去，一面嚮我們飄近來，而明輪轉動的喧聲，起初象是越來越近的瀑布傾瀉而下的嘩嘩聲，後來已可以聽出葉片飛速轉動的聲音，可以分辨出海水捲入葉片和灑落下來的聲音。我們船上值更的水手，象所有從夢中突然驚醒過來的人那樣，一副慌裏慌張的樣子，機械地、不按章法地敲着信號鐘，煙囪隨即沉重地喘了口粗氣，竭盡全力嗚響了陰鬱的汽笛，震撼了輪船的整個骨架。從霧中傳來了回答，很象是火車頭拉響的汽笛聲，但這聲響亮的汽笛很快就消失在迷霧中了，此後，連明輪的喧聲和紅色的信號燈也慢慢地消融在霧中了。剛纔與我們交會的那艘輪船的喧聲和汽笛聲中，有着某種氣勢洶洶的尋釁的味道，――大概那艘輪船的船長是個剛愎自用、目空一切的年輕人――然而面對這樣的長夜，凡間的勇敢又算得了什麽呢！
“我們在哪兒？”我忽然想道。值更的水手們大概又都在打瞌睡了，乘客也全都墜入了黑甜鄉，——大霧使我心神不定……我想象不出，我們此刻身在何處，因為黑海的這一帶我過去從未來過……我不理解這天夜裏那種沉默的奧秘，一如我不理解生活中的一切。我是孤獨的，孑然一身，我不知道我為什麽要活在這個世界上。不知道為什麽要有這樣一個奇異的夜，也不知道為什麽這艘睡意朦朧的輪船要漂浮在這睡意朦朧的海上？而最主要的是我不知道為什麽這一切不是一目瞭然，而是充滿着某種深奧、神秘的含義？
我被這岑寂的夜，被世上所從未有過的這種岑寂迷住了，我完全聽命於這岑寂的主宰。有一瞬間，我恍惚聽到在極遠極遠的地方，有衹雄雞在喔喔啼唱……我不由得笑了。“這是不可能的。”我想道，心情愉快得難以理解；此刻我覺得我以往生活中的一切都是那麽渺小，那麽乏味！要是這會兒我看到凌波仙子飛升到月亮上，也不會感到驚奇的……我不會感到驚奇，哪怕看到落水的女鬼浮出水來，坐到放下來的救生艇上，緊挨着客艙的舷窗，周身染滿蒼白的月色，……此刻月亮正直視着這些圓圓的舷窗，用行將熄滅的光華照亮沉睡着的人的臉，而他們睡在那裏，則象一個個死人……要不要叫醒什麽人？不，何必呢！此刻我不需要任何人，任何人也不需要我，我們相互間是格格不人的……
那種永遠擺脫不了的巨大的憂傷反使我的心緒變得難以言說的寧靜，這種寧靜主宰了我。我思索着常常吸引着我的那些事：思索着地球上的一切生物，思索着古代的人類，這輪月亮曾看到過他們所有的人，但是在月亮眼裏，他們大概都是渺小的，彼此長得一模一樣，以致月亮都沒有發覺他們在地球上消失。但是此刻我覺得他們與我也格格不入，因為我沒有産生經常産生的那種強烈的渴望：渴望去經受他們的種種經歷，渴望同億萬斯年之前生活過、戀愛過、痛苦過、歡樂過，然後匆匆逝去，沒有留下一絲痕跡地消失在時光和世紀的黑暗之中的人融成一體。然而有一點我是深信不疑的——這便是存在着某種比遙遠的古代更崇高的東西……也許，這東西就是今夜默默地藴藏着的那種奧秘吧。我第一次想到，也許正是人們通常稱之為死亡的那件偉大的事，在今夜凝視着我的臉，我第一次如此寧靜地迎候它，並且象人們應當理解它那樣地理解了它。早晨，當我睜開眼睛時，我感到輪船正在全速行駛，感到從好幾扇打開的舷窗內拂來海濱的微風。我從鋪位上跳了下來，周身重又充滿一種下意識的對生活的樂觀感。我迅速地漱洗完畢，穿好衣服。輪船的走廊裏響起了響亮的鈴聲，召喚大傢去用早餐，於是我打開臥艙的大門，興衝衝地把擦得烏黑鐙亮的皮靴，橐橐地踩着梯子，嚮上登去。後來我笑盈盈地坐在甲板上，為我們必定會經歷的一切，嚮上蒼表示一種孩童式的真摯的感激。我覺得所以要有黑夜，所以要有迷霧，是為了讓我更愛、更珍惜早晨。而早晨是柔和的，陽光明媚的，——如緑鬆石一般春光曼麗的大空高懸在輪船上邊，海水則輕盈地拍濺着船舷，奔流而去。
1901年
I remember at first it caused a great panic. Heading upstairs, knocking almost the moment the signal clock. Chimneys breathing heavily, chilling roar burst out; we all transfixed, looking at more and more dense fog. Spread fog suddenly, suddenly shrink, like billowing smoke floating to floating wildly. Sometimes, the fog wrapped round and round the ship, that we all feel each other move like ghosts in the pitch darkness into. This gloomy picture, people feel like they're in the bleak autumn evening, the cold damp Freeze your trembling, and he was blue in the face. Later, the fog opened slightly more, but also even some shades, that is, the less murderous four volts. Ship and started running, but running very timid, trembling even cause engine rotation is almost silent, the ship kept ringing the bell signal, farther and farther from the coast, drove straight into the south. There, the real night, and that the black shale as general Zhongzhuo dark color, has been poured full of fog filled the sky. People feel that, over there, two steps beyond is the end of the world, and then in the past is Jiaoren vast desert tremble. Speak unwarrantedly truss, the door canopies on the falling drops of water drops on the rope. Flew out from the chimney of the wet coal particles, as Black usually around next to the chimney. Really want to see clearly at that distance what ghastly things, even if that something Ye Hao, however, the fog around me, it is like a dream, so that both hearing and vision and slow. Ship like a blimp, before your eyes are gray chaotic world, such as eyelash silk hanging cold water vapor in general, not far from my place, there is a sailor while smoking, biting wet and salty a small mustache, sometimes I think he is like a dream to the people ... ... the evening at six o'clock, when we are out of the cabin.
Mast lodge lights suddenly shot through the fog of the light, from afar, rather like the human eye. From the thick and short chimney emitting clouds of black smoke solemnly, a low, hanging in the air. Heading upstairs, needlessly monotonous bell sounded the signal, I do not know where the "strong sound fog horn" is ominous tone, the piercing call and did not actually ... ... and whatever may sound fog horn, this is only because caused by excessive tension on the auditory illusion. Man knows no boundaries in the mysterious international Wuhai among the ears tend to feel that there is something dark in the ring ... ... more and more resistance Ming Yu deceive the fog. It is the same in the vast sky high together. In the lower ship around in the stoppage, almost always attached to the sides of the ship took a slight splashing in the water. The long night of winter coming. Depression, worry all the time of day has caused us to wait shipwreck, and everyone therefore exhausted. To compensate for the shock suffered during the day, crowded with passengers and crew in the dining room. Shipping outside is pitch-dark night, but the ship, we have this little world actually bright, lively, crowded crowded head. People play cards, drink tea, drink, the waiter stream table in the wine cabinet and between the coming and going, banging to open the cork. I lay lying below the cabin, listening to his head on top of Zada's footsteps. I do not know who is and playing the piano, play a team a little sad melody of a popular waltz contrived, so I would also like Everybody go busy busy, we got dressed, walked out of the cabin.
That night, all the people are very happy about. At least I think so, we are happy to get through tonight so carefree. We regard the risk of fog and neglect, enjoy dancing, singing, eyes sparkling shine. Later, everyone finally tired, want to go to sleep ... ... so generous, hot, air is poor, the lights had gone a little sick of the dining room, the people finally getting to go empty. Wait a half hour later, as the ship where most places, has been dark. From time to time from the deck to Dangdang bell, in the moment of silence, the bells sound is awful. Later, more and more sparse bells, more and more sparse as if the ... ... Meeting million have died.
I walked along the corridor, went to the lower deck, deck room in the back with the cold marble walls, sitting for a while ... ... Suddenly, even the deck room lights are off, I suddenly became blind. Humming in my mind that night people sang songs and played music, went dark in front of the ladder, stepping stairs up and on the deck around, you can only go a few levels, the foot could not help but stop to stop, Moonlight's beauty and sadness deterred me.
Ah, this is what a strange night of it! Time was already very late, about how long it will Needless to dawn. As we have just singing, drinking, laughing and joking and talking nonsense to the moment, here. In this we do not understand, by the space, fog, and merged into the world of ocean, that gentle, lonely, and always moody moon rose up slowly to allow the deep midnight, shrouded million sinks ... ... just like five thousand years ago a million years ago exactly the same ... ... fog tightly Guzhu we, as people look too creepy. In the fog of the central, as a mysterious Phantom of the Opera, as a residual yellow moon night of a fall for the south, one side _set_ to stay the night stuck in a pale, and like the human eye, from the composition of the surrounding halo far spread to the huge eyes and overlooking the earth, the ship lights up a round of deep pores. It has a sort of circular channels, "Apocalypse Now" type of things ... ... the same time, some is not a human, always present in the silent mysteries of the tomb-like stillness of this, - there the whole night today in exist in the ship, there is the moon, the moon is close enough to striking at the moment next to the sea, but indifferent to the expression of melancholy look on my face.
I slowly finish the top of the ladder a few levels, Leaning on the railing. The whole ship was in my feet. Chuochu wood in the hull and deck on the side of the bridge. East West, a pool of water in a pool of long track. A dim flickering light - this is the fog of the scar. Railings, cast like a silk rope and benches generally light color of the shadow of smoke. Ships, chimneys and engineers have shown that they are extremely heavy central, is very strong, and a root railings are soaring, where the shaking. But the whole ship is still gives a sense of lightness. Rather like a ship turned into a ghost of the symmetry of a cause, stop line in the pale moonlight fog lifted and revealed the channels on the screen. Water lying low on the starboard side, the flat was almost no trace of ripple. It, the sea, mysteriously, silently shaking, into the bath full of moonlight like a general fog of smoke, flashing a sparkling waves, resembled countless flickering Jin Yi. But this flash in addition to twenty paces from me, disappearing, and then only faintly seen far more, and became as dead men lost their luster in the eyes. Everywhere I look, again feel that this round of the moon is a mysterious Phantom of the changes into the pale image of the great silence which is a mystery, this mystery part is that we never may know, never Solutions may claim ... ...
Then, abruptly, the rudder signal bell rang out upstairs. Then the bell while the spell of desolation, breaking the silence of the night, in the same time, the fuss came from the front with the noise and speech sound. That instant, I had a premonition about what danger, they open their eyes wide, staring at the dark fog, suddenly, a blood-red lights like a giant ruby, the mist rose higher and higher, closer to us quickly . Under the lights, a row of lights in the windows like a long string of dull gold spots, diffuse gas in the water side of his hand away, and a float for us recently, while the next round of the rotation with the noise, at first, as is getting closer cascading waterfall rushing sound, subsequently rapidly rotating blades can hear the sound, you can distinguish the involvement of water off leaves and crisp sound. We value more the sailors on board, like a sudden awakening from a dream of all people, as a Huanglihuangzhang the way, mechanically, not by tapping the tricks of the signal bell, then heavy gasp chimney mouth coarse, do full ringing the gloom of the whistle, the entire frame shook the ship. Came the reply from the fog, it sounded like a locomotive whistle, but a loud siren sound will soon disappear in the mist, and then, even the next round with the noise and the red lights are slowly melting in the mist of the. Just the intersection of that ship our ship with the noise and sound of the whistle, with the taste of a menacing aggressive - probably the captain of that ship is a ship opinionated, supercilious young man - the face of this night, however, where among the brave and what of it!
That never escape the great distress to my state of mind against unspeakable become quiet, this quiet dominate me. I was always attracted me thinking about those things: thinking about all life on the planet, thinking about the ancient human beings, this round of the moon had seen them all, but in the eyes of the moon, they are probably insignificant, looks exactly the same each other, so that the moon did not find them in the earth. But now I think I can fit them with, because I often have not produced the kind of intense desire: the desire to undergo their various experiences lived long before the same Yiwansinian, loving, suffering, joy too, and then hurry gone, without leaving a trace disappeared in the darkness of time and who centuries blend. But one thing I believe in - that there is a more noble than the ancient stuff ... ... maybe, that something is the kind of night the mystery of silence bears it. I first thought, perhaps it is commonly called the death of the great things of that piece, staring at my face tonight, so quietly I first greeted it, and it is as it should be understood as to understand it. Morning when I opened my eyes, I was ship is at full speed, feel the open windows from within several fan brush to coastal breezes. I jumped down from the bunk, the whole body again filled with a subconscious sense of optimism about life. I quickly finished toilet, get dressed. Corridors of ships bell rang out loud, call us to breakfast, so I opened the cabin door, and excitedly to the stirrup bright polished black boots, sack sack to stepping on the ladder, go up the board. Later, I sat smiling on the deck, as we will all experience, to represent a child-like God sincere gratitude. I think so there must be night, so there must be the fog is to make me more love, cherish the morning. The morning was mild and sunny, and - like spring Mary turquoise usually a big space ship hung in the top, water is splashing light pat on the ship's side, rushing away.
1901
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请给我换一个看看！ 拜托，快把噪音停掉！我读累了，想听点音乐或者请来支歌曲！
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