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七绝 夜宿湛江

给各位诗友问好，请指教！

七绝 夜宿湛江

文/ lulu

风拂江面水深幽，
凝望桥头月似钩。
斜映水中堤岸树，
飘零落叶在寒秋。

2009-01-26 00:14:44
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qinghongh ?2009-01-26 08:15:13?? Reply with quote


lulu wrote:
给各位诗友问好，请指教！
...


写景不错。“象”改为“似”，如何？

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View user's profile     qinghonghCollection
暗香如沁 ?2009-01-26 18:22:45?? Reply with quote


qinghongh wrote:
lulu wrote:
给各位诗友问好，请指教！
...


写景不错。“象”改为“似”，如何？


附议Smile

祝福新春好。

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View user's profile     暗香如沁Collection
晓松 ?2009-01-26 19:50:59?? Reply with quote


好一幅深秋风景画，意境幽幽~

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View user's profile     晓松Collection
lulu ?2009-01-27 05:56:10?? Reply with quote


qinghongh wrote:
lulu wrote:
给各位诗友问好，请指教！
...


写景不错。“象”改为“似”，如何？

给庆宏老师及诗友问好！祝各位：牛年吉祥，万事如意！希望在这里结识更多的朋友，学到更多的东西，望诗友多多指教！
谢庆宏老师雅正！lulu感觉“似”更委婉一些，已把“像”该为“似”，谢谢！

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View user's profile     luluCollection
lulu ?2009-01-27 06:01:33?? Reply with quote


暗香如沁 wrote:
qinghongh wrote:
lulu wrote:
给各位诗友问好，请指教！
...


写景不错。“象”改为“似”，如何？


附议Smile

祝福新春好。

祝福暗香如沁新春好！

_________________
View user's profile     luluCollection
lulu ?2009-01-27 06:03:22?? Reply with quote


晓松 wrote:
好一幅深秋风景画，意境幽幽~

谢晓松雅评！祝福晓松新春好！

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View user's profile     luluCollection
现代诗歌
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