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敦智

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?????18 Jun 2007

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村言

洋房兀立小山坡,惹得村人眼似魔。
时代于今不同了,羡他有女赚钱多。
2008-2-10

2008-02-21 03:41:19
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晓松 ?2008-02-22 15:53:43?? Reply with quote


贴近现实,走进生活。问好~

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qinghongh ?2008-02-22 21:05:01?? Reply with quote


小诗写诗。第三句是否太过口语化?

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冰清 ?2008-02-23 21:02:19?? Reply with quote


我倒觉得这"口语化"出神, 且与"村言"贴近。
我读过楼主不少的诗,很欣赏他语言的这一特色.

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qinghongh ?2008-02-24 06:22:23?? Reply with quote


谢冰清老师点拨。问好!

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