| 西方文学 Western Literature |
 
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| jemmy ?2007-09-17 02:51:52?? |  |
戴玨译
I was a cicada
I was grieved like a cicada
Maybe I wasn't dropping the idea forever at all
By your crueless and callosity
Hold my dead body with your palm
Another man went to learn weaving
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| jemmy ?2007-09-17 02:56:32?? | |
周生:
当有大收获,望分享
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| William Zhou周道模 ?2007-09-17 03:56:14?? | |
回黄娟：
《诗刊》和《绿风》以“西部的太阳”为题联合征诗，我得了个小奖，去石河子领了奖，参加了诗歌研讨会和“中国诗人西部行”采风活动，结识了许多忘命读诗写诗之人。我将挂出一些拙作以求教，望批评。
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| 戴玨 ?2007-09-17 05:44:40?? | |
| jemmy wrote: |
戴玨译
I was a cicada
I was grieved like a cicada
Maybe I wasn't dropping the idea forever at all
By your crueless and callosity
Hold my dead body with your palm
Another man went to learn weaving |
請不要將零散的幾個建議性的句子湊一塊就說成是我的翻譯，實際上你這詩我還沒完全弄懂。Maybe I wasn't dropping the idea forever at all 更非我的句子。正如你所說，第二三句譯成
I was grieved like a cicada
by your cruelness and callosity...
詩意已有區別。
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| jemmy ?2007-09-17 06:08:14?? | |
戴版主,不逼你不出山嘛,不过几个句子,你译不就结罗
先谢你
周生:
祝贺!愿很快就能拜读
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| Lake ?2007-09-17 08:47:09?? | |
cicada 不是“蝉”吗？ 也有“蚕”的意思？
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| 戴玨 ?2007-09-17 10:45:04?? | |
| Lake wrote: |
| cicada 不是“蝉”吗？ 也有“蚕”的意思？ |
竟然沒發覺，汗顏！ 
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| jemmy ?2007-09-17 14:24:57?? | |
这silkworm把我给缠住了,连带裹了戴生
超级该杀
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| jemmy ?2007-09-19 14:43:23?? | |
Pined with love
I were a silkworm
I was grieved like a silkworm
Maybe I wasn't dropping the idea forever at all
When I faced your crueless and callosity
Held my dead body in the palm of your hand
Another man went to learn weaving
读书人的脾气,戴生看来是断不肯做这译主,我又不能让这诗这么挂着,而且戴生会为我的"中国"译法感到耻辱,为着后者,我不能坑他。这样吧，我只有声明我从戴生那获得许多帮助，但我的翻译也基于一个不成熟的想法，那就是让外国人一看就知道是中国诗，许多中国式的英语词汇用法外国也接受了嘛。
欢迎探讨
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