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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌 Post new topic   Reply to topic
是谁给你那明眸?
上城
进士出身


Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 2024
Location: 江夏黄鹤楼
上城Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-01 20:43:45    Post subject: 是谁给你那明眸? Reply with quote

是谁给你那明眸
让我不惜笔墨
驻立在这潺潺溪流
守候怀拥竖琴的旅客
我要与之偕临千年的楼阁
为你倾诉那不倦的衷情
手指纤柔着桥上的行客
将一幅画镶进我的风景
行吟诗人呵,那渴望的麦田
曾经占据露丝忧郁的心
当朝阳普照明丽的一天
苍穹下静默的琴
窗口将世界切割
便飞出无边的歌
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hepingdao
Site Admin


Joined: 25 May 2006
Posts: 8106

hepingdaoCollection
PostPosted: 2008-11-01 20:46:44    Post subject: Reply with quote

伤城的诗歌有潜力
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上城
进士出身


Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 2024
Location: 江夏黄鹤楼
上城Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-01 20:53:20    Post subject: Reply with quote

谢谢夸奖。好久没有听见别人的赞美了 Very Happy
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博弈
榜眼


Joined: 21 Dec 2006
Posts: 4381
Location: SFO
博弈Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-01 21:23:57    Post subject: Reply with quote

hepingdao wrote:
伤城的诗歌有潜力


同意呢.
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(在不斷的審醜裡終將建立起新的審美)
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半溪明月
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Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-02 03:39:58    Post subject: Reply with quote

喜欢这一首~
语感气息很有翻译诗歌的风味~
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上城
进士出身


Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 2024
Location: 江夏黄鹤楼
上城Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-02 05:21:29    Post subject: Reply with quote

博弈 wrote:
hepingdao wrote:
伤城的诗歌有潜力


同意呢.


看到你们都这样看。我能说些什么呢? Shocked
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上城
进士出身


Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 2024
Location: 江夏黄鹤楼
上城Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-02 05:28:50    Post subject: Reply with quote

半溪明月 wrote:
喜欢这一首~
语感气息很有翻译诗歌的风味~


哈哈。好眼力。我觉得诗歌都被西方人写尽了,中国人实在翻不出什么新花样。但是这一首,语感方面虽然相似,但绝对完全不同。我还没有看到有哪一个翻译家能翻出我这样的水平 Very Happy

这首诗看似简单。没有数年的修炼是写不出来的(就是洛夫也写不出来)。现在我写的大多算是练笔。 Very Happy

我的看法:自由体还是应该好好的发展一下。
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白水
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Joined: 02 Oct 2006
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Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-02 07:10:02    Post subject: Reply with quote

伤城 wrote:
博弈 wrote:
hepingdao wrote:
伤城的诗歌有潜力


同意呢.


看到你们都这样看。我能说些什么呢? Shocked


笑喘 Very Happy Very Happy
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