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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

夏菊花

婉儿
童生

Joined: 18 Nov 2006
Posts: 43
Location: 西北
婉儿Collection

Posted: 2006-11-18 06:52:28 Post subject: 夏菊花

夏菊花顶一只碗, 再顶一只再顶......一只她把脚举上头顶用手支撑身体, 嘴里还吐着芳香的玫瑰屏住呼吸的我, 紧张地等, 耳朵, 鼻子, 眼睛......的功能十分钟后瓷碗终于回到手里, 台下一片掌声和酸痛的瞳孔, 全国就这么一朵夏天的菊花我摸了摸僵硬的脖子沉思, 如果哪天我也把碗顶在头上

和平岛
举人

Joined: 25 May 2006
Posts: 1277
Location: Victoria, Canada
和平岛Collection

Posted: 2006-11-18 12:10:10 Post subject:

引人入胜的描述最后的提升也很有一点意思 _________________ 写诗是为了写更好的诗

了因大兄
秀才

Joined: 15 Nov 2006
Posts: 209

了因大兄Collection

Posted: 2006-11-18 19:15:07 Post subject:

我摸了摸僵硬的脖子沉思, 如果哪天我也把碗顶在头上写的好，这可不是一朝一夕的功夫。 _________________ 我不是树上的黑木耳，我被爱过不能随随便便不回家 http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1236932795

婉儿
童生

Joined: 18 Nov 2006
Posts: 43
Location: 西北
婉儿Collection

Posted: 2006-11-19 06:39:14 Post subject:

谢谢两位

维鹿延
秀才

Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 212
Location: 中国广东
维鹿延Collection

Posted: 2006-11-19 08:57:33 Post subject:

加精。 _________________ 散步者身体里面的声音

婉儿
童生

Joined: 18 Nov 2006
Posts: 43
Location: 西北
婉儿Collection

Posted: 2006-11-20 07:33:13 Post subject:

[quote="维鹿延"]加精。[/quote] 谢过版主, 这个黄牌牌好靓耶. 喜欢

鹤雨
秀才

Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 113
Location: 上海
鹤雨Collection

Posted: 2006-11-20 18:21:24 Post subject:

生动的场景描述！ _________________ 愿意和大家共同进步!

婉儿
童生

Joined: 18 Nov 2006
Posts: 43
Location: 西北
婉儿Collection

Posted: 2006-11-21 05:47:55 Post subject:

[quote="鹤雨"]生动的场景描述！[/quote] 谢谢鹤雨, 问好

杯中冲浪
进士出身

Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection

Posted: 2006-11-21 07:01:20 Post subject:

身临其境的感受。 _________________ 杯中冲浪.披履而行 http://blog.sina.com.cn/shoutao006

白水
大学士

Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection

Posted: 2006-11-21 08:05:23 Post subject:

[quote="北方狼"]身临其境的感受。[/quote] 身临其境就好

一树摇风
童生

Joined: 15 Nov 2006
Posts: 37

一树摇风Collection

Posted: 2006-11-24 23:56:02 Post subject:

呵，会玩杂技的菊花～～ _________________ 诗是诗人的绿卡／美是美人的护照

孙慧峰
童生

Joined: 09 Oct 2006
Posts: 97

孙慧峰Collection

Posted: 2006-11-26 05:24:35 Post subject:

有味道!很清新

婉儿
童生

Joined: 18 Nov 2006
Posts: 43
Location: 西北
婉儿Collection

Posted: 2006-12-25 13:57:27 Post subject:

一树摇风 wrote:

呵，会玩杂技的菊花～～

谢谢一树摇风
祝节日快乐

婉儿
童生

Joined: 18 Nov 2006
Posts: 43
Location: 西北
婉儿Collection

Posted: 2006-12-25 13:57:58 Post subject:

孙慧峰 wrote:

有味道!很清新

谢谢你, 节日快乐

zmj166
秀才

Joined: 10 Jan 2009
Posts: 461

zmj166Collection

Posted: 2009-10-30 10:15:11 Post subject:

好一篇分行散文

吟啸徐行
举人

Joined: 03 May 2008
Posts: 1336
Location: 中国安徽
吟啸徐行Collection

Posted: 2009-11-02 00:18:15 Post subject:

很独特，有非马之风！ _________________ 彰显自我爱好,弘扬民族文化,追求诗意生活.

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

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