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遛达的七七
秀才


Joined: 07 Jun 2006
Posts: 329

遛达的七七Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-09 19:20:25    Post subject: 此贴挂久,不提也罢 Reply with quote

.
Blog http://xz.netsh.com/eden/blog/ctl_eden_blog.php?iBlogID=1249977


原谅吧,让我重新开过
我是初放即落的一朵。已芜靡已匿迹
已沦落馥郁的空气,已交出浆果

原谅我乘着浪上岸
晨钟里你的规劝何其旷远!
去年我开车入海的笑颜
还在花色如新的柜台上招揽
世人寻常走过,纷纷原谅了我

请你为我弹拨好音色的曲调
请爱上胸臆里的语声
请看护我的记忆,
有一天你把这记忆全都还我

让我得到记忆吧!让我记住你的原谅!
若你凡心尚苦,仍不肯宽恕
那么让我黯淡
回归你的苦岸

当我阅读你续写的这一幕颂辞
你可见我坐于五色莲台
眉目温和,向下诉祷:
原谅我吧,原谅我,
原谅吧。原谅。统统原谅。全都还我。











《鹤 湖》


任意的云到达人间
在松涛外收紧了水线

展开的鹤湖, 羽毛有光, 草色愈妍
“飞行优越不可描述”
因此可以诟病。
可以提起四角抖开浮光
从深处映现广大庭园

事件得以沉降
主人避开了失局
鹤得以在正午昏睡
至傍晚,习习地
由低低飞去的蜻蜓
载入泛爱又抑郁的湖面







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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-09 20:17:24    Post subject: Reply with quote

七七, 回来了? 昨天博士还说到你.很有特色的诗歌.
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遛达的七七
秀才


Joined: 07 Jun 2006
Posts: 329

遛达的七七Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-09 20:46:31    Post subject: 哈呀,白水! Reply with quote

开心在这里看见你呵

今天burnaby的会,去了没?
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迪拜
同进士出身


Joined: 31 Oct 2006
Posts: 1588

迪拜Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-09 21:52:17    Post subject: Reply with quote

七七好,

又有好作品了

问候一声.
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江晨
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Joined: 22 Feb 2007
Posts: 102
Location: 中国浙江
江晨Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-09 22:59:06    Post subject: Reply with quote

如鹤飞翔
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中国龙泉剑瓷文化网:http://www.lqjcwh.com/ 我的博客网址: http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1246181482 http://aaabc888.bokee.com/ 我的创作室网址:http://www.zjlm.net/web/web_article.asp?wid=214
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韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 00:23:06    Post subject: Reply with quote

七小姐.多好听的名字啊.

<<七小姐>>


你是老爷用一块玉换来的念想
你是太太用一拄香请来的
宿愿

不不

你是少爷我 用无所事事
梦来的名字

七小姐
你让我从此
不会做
任何事了

不不
七小姐
你让我看到每一个成年的女子
都产生爱意
或怜惜



或与才气与爱情有关的
猜疑
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靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345
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仨石子
童生


Joined: 11 Mar 2007
Posts: 35

仨石子Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 04:35:07    Post subject: Reply with quote

向才女看齐
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里面有点自己的东西 http://blog.sina.com.cn/sashizi
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杯中冲浪
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Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 04:50:21    Post subject: Reply with quote

很欢迎阿
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杯中冲浪.披履而行
http://blog.sina.com.cn/shoutao006
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 04:52:17    Post subject: Re: 哈呀,白水! Reply with quote

七小姐 wrote:
开心在这里看见你呵

今天burnaby的会,去了没?


noooo NOOOOOOOOOOOOO
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下一个偶像是野兽
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Joined: 16 Jan 2007
Posts: 504
Location: 西安
下一个偶像是野兽Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 08:18:30    Post subject: Reply with quote

很好的诗。欣赏,问好。
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遛达的七七
秀才


Joined: 07 Jun 2006
Posts: 329

遛达的七七Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 13:40:19    Post subject: hi Reply with quote

嗷咬! 这个……这个这个野兽,,漏点照哦!!!! 吓一跳的说。

问好以上各位,七七正在休假与找新工作中…… 十分加两分的悠闲跟焦虑。感谢各位的友好!感动啊 :))
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遛达的七七
秀才


Joined: 07 Jun 2006
Posts: 329

遛达的七七Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 13:43:35    Post subject: Reply with quote

刚从洛夫先生处出来,尚沉浸美图与美文。白水姑娘没有去,7很遗憾——本以为可以多看一眼美女玉容 :)

期待呀 Laughing
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遛达的七七
秀才


Joined: 07 Jun 2006
Posts: 329

遛达的七七Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 13:46:44    Post subject: Reply with quote

再次感谢迪拜、仨石子、江晨、杯中冲浪、韩少君!!

个人人为少君的好过七七的很多,致敬意和谢意 Wink 祝开心!
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博弈
榜眼


Joined: 21 Dec 2006
Posts: 4381
Location: SFO
博弈Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 14:36:41    Post subject: Reply with quote

七小姐 wrote:
刚从洛夫先生处出来,尚沉浸美图与美文。白水姑娘没有去,7很遗憾——本以为可以多看一眼美女玉容 :)

期待呀 Laughing


你的詩讀得不多, 沒事的話多發表些, 大家都喜歡看到你的詩.
有空見到洛夫先生的話, 不妨告知有位 蘭蒂 女士向他問好.
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(在不斷的審醜裡終將建立起新的審美)
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nobody
进士出身


Joined: 31 Dec 2006
Posts: 2651
Location: Madtown
nobodyCollection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 15:12:47    Post subject: Reply with quote

几个月前偶然看到七小姐的文字,打头的是:
"要我确认喜欢哪一位的话,我指给你看,就是那个还会脸红的吧.."

马上就打起十二分精神, 觉得遇到了一个有与众不同的感悟力和表达力的天才型选手. 能从芜杂中直取根本. 并不着力地快速呈现.

大家看来也都假装喜欢你,没事就多来撒撒泼, 抽抽疯吧.
你那"感动啊", 一听就是跟瓜子皮一起嗑出来的.

我在温哥华7, 8年, 刚离开. 但从来不网游, 直到大半年前被和平岛拖下水. 否则有很多机会跟你们密会. 上次我赶paper, 未能赴洛夫的鸿门宴. 说你会去的,但后来告诉我也没去.估计没假休.

刚收到email, 另一个朋友(vancouver)也在休假. 大家都好好的吧.
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杨海军
进士出身


Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 16:52:27    Post subject: Reply with quote

展开的鹤湖, 羽毛有光, 草色愈妍

“飞行优越不可描述”

因此可以诟病。

可以提起四角抖开浮光

从深处映现广大庭园

好陌生的语言!!好!!
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走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮
——拙作《离开村庄》
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751
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迪拜
同进士出身


Joined: 31 Oct 2006
Posts: 1588

迪拜Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 18:51:40    Post subject: Reply with quote

<七小姐的尘世生活>好过<鹤湖>

但是,标题,直接用<尘世生活>

有一个大缺点

----每一段的结尾"太押韵了"

失去了"现代感"

<湖>还是太费解,普通人很难懂得.
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遛达的七七
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Joined: 07 Jun 2006
Posts: 329

遛达的七七Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 19:56:08    Post subject: hey Reply with quote

“七小姐的尘世生活”是我的blog,不是第一个诗的题目。第一个无题。呵。

押韵及其他,我说了算。
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天一黑
童生


Joined: 30 Aug 2007
Posts: 52

天一黑Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 21:52:55    Post subject: 昨夜飞过一滴雨 Reply with quote

昨夜飞过一滴雨

长大变成小天鹅

她今天钻进鹅群里

问人家昨天是不是也是一滴雨
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遛达的七七
秀才


Joined: 07 Jun 2006
Posts: 329

遛达的七七Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-10 23:21:32    Post subject: Reply with quote

天一黑这个帅哦! 爱死啦,哈 wild face

什么来的一滴雨
混进鹅群没人理
只有两个有来历
悄悄嘀咕一小句:

“寡人是流浪的冰雹”
“本宫乃游泳的水草”
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