宁家珍
秀才
Joined: 20 May 2009
Posts: 470
Location: 中国黄山
宁家珍Collection |
 Posted: 2011-12-01 07:04:28 Post subject: 五绝 观夕阳 |
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五绝 观夕阳 （旧韵）
宁家珍
林梢斜落日，五彩染横江。
珍惜瞬间美，人生短亦长。 |
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黄洋界
探花
Joined: 23 Mar 2007
Posts: 3301
Location: 多伦多,加拿大
黄洋界Collection |
| Posted: 2011-12-01 15:51:54 Post subject: |
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结句“人生短亦长”好，表现了豁达的人生观。
第一句文字可否再作些调整，改作“林边斜日落”如何？
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喜金石书画，友竹菊梅兰 |
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宁家珍
秀才
Joined: 20 May 2009
Posts: 470
Location: 中国黄山
宁家珍Collection |
| Posted: 2011-12-01 19:44:19 Post subject: |
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| 谢谢黄洋界老师的指点。现改为“林梢”如何？ |
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黄洋界
探花
Joined: 23 Mar 2007
Posts: 3301
Location: 多伦多,加拿大
黄洋界Collection |
| Posted: 2011-12-02 06:31:07 Post subject: |
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“林梢”更切合图片景象，好！
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喜金石书画，友竹菊梅兰 |
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qinghongh
榜眼
Joined: 14 Oct 2007
Posts: 4110
qinghonghCollection |
| Posted: 2011-12-04 07:50:12 Post subject: |
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| 观落日，悟人生。 |
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宁家珍
秀才
Joined: 20 May 2009
Posts: 470
Location: 中国黄山
宁家珍Collection |
| Posted: 2011-12-05 01:40:54 Post subject: |
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| 谢谢庆宏老师的欣赏，冬日问好。 |
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笑聊
探花
Joined: 05 Jan 2010
Posts: 3448
Location: 中国江苏无锡
笑聊Collection |
| Posted: 2011-12-05 22:41:39 Post subject: |
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| 问候家珍诗友！特欣赏未句“人生短亦长。”讲出了人生哲理。 |
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宁家珍
秀才
Joined: 20 May 2009
Posts: 470
Location: 中国黄山
宁家珍Collection |
| Posted: 2011-12-07 02:47:29 Post subject: |
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| 笑聊 wrote: |
| 问候家珍诗友！特欣赏未句“人生短亦长。”讲出了人生哲理。 |
谢谢笑聊诗友的欣赏，祝你健康快乐！ |
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