| Lake 举人
 
  
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-02 12:25:48    发表主题: The Geisha—A Sequel |   |  
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				| The Geisha—A Sequel 
 After Sakura plunges
 into deep water
 Sayuri, too, plunges
 into a void. Petals
 discolored, mind entombed.
 
 Inevitably, cherry blossoms
 drowned as doomed,
 while Sayuri incarnated
 as Mistress of Chairman—
 her new Danna.
 
 Can a nirvana searched
 be reached?
 Tears of ecstasy
 streaming down her eyes,
 gray, misty.
 
 Years proceed.
 
 Uprooted and transplanted,
 Sayuri and Chairman
 now reside in New York City
 to shun away from unspoken
 gossip over the heir
 to the family's property.
 
 Chairman grows weaker
 and weaker, and not long,
 leaves Sayuri behind.
 Like a kite with a broken
 string, she's more puzzled
 and scared than sad.
 
 What then, is her destiny?
 Blown off the branches
 Sakura falls and cries.
 Oh dear, oh dear.
 
 Grass turns green and brown.
 A stunning debut unveils
 a slender, short-haired woman.
 In an altered black Kimono,
 she plays a violin with her
 once-Samisen-playing-hands.
 Simple grace and delicacy!
 
 In oblivion, her eyes half closed.
 Her head slightly throws back and forth.
 Her body moves with the bow
 that sings on her heart-strings,
 mesmerizing the entire audience
 with her melody—
 "Memoirs of a Geisha".
 
 With a standing ovation
 her heart vibrates.
 
 Sakura unfolds and blooms…
 
 
 .
 _________________
 the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins
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		| kokho 进士出身
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-11-30
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 来自: Singapore
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-02 12:30:56    发表主题: |   |  
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				| WELL DONE MY FRIEND   
 Can a nirvana searched be reached?
 
 THIS IS THE SENTENCE I DO NOT UNDERSTAND...
 
 searched = quest ???
 _________________
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		| kokho 进士出身
 
  
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-02 12:32:23    发表主题: |   |  
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				| Simple grace and delicacy.... 
 delicacy CAN THIS WORD BE USED EXCEPT TO DESCRIBE FOOD?
 _________________
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		| kokho 进士出身
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-11-30
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-02 12:33:31    发表主题: |   |  
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				| With a standing ovation her heart vibrates.
 
 With  = AFTER ???
 
 .
 _________________
 乒乓、摄影、诗歌
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		| kokho 进士出身
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-11-30
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 来自: Singapore
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-02 12:36:08    发表主题: |   |  
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				| Her head slightly throws back and forth. Her body moves with the bow
 
 HER HEAD GYRATES IN UNISON WITH THE BOW (MELODY) ??
 _________________
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		| Lake 举人
 
  
 注册时间: 2007-01-09
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-02 12:51:49    发表主题: |   |  
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 |  
				| 
 
	  | kokho 写到: |  
	  | WELL DONE MY FRIEND   
 Can a nirvana searched be reached?
 
 THIS IS THE SENTENCE I DO NOT UNDERSTAND...
 
 searched = quest ???
 |  
 
   
 I read it somewhere in Rexroth's Complete Poems, something like, a nirvana with desire cannot be reached.
 _________________
 the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins
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		| Lake 举人
 
  
 注册时间: 2007-01-09
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-02 12:53:28    发表主题: |   |  
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 |  
				| 
 
	  | kokho 写到: |  
	  | Simple grace and delicacy.... 
 delicacy CAN THIS WORD BE USED EXCEPT TO DESCRIBE FOOD?
 |  
 I... guess...so...
  _________________
 the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins
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		| Lake 举人
 
  
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-02 12:59:43    发表主题: |   |  
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	  | kokho 写到: |  
	  | With a standing ovation her heart vibrates.
 
 With  = AFTER ???
 
 .
 |  
 I meant at the same time, because of it, not after.
 _________________
 the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins
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		| Lake 举人
 
  
 注册时间: 2007-01-09
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-02 13:10:45    发表主题: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				| 
 
	  | kokho 写到: |  
	  | Her head slightly throws back and forth. Her body moves with the bow
 
 HER HEAD GYRATES IN UNISON WITH THE BOW (MELODY) ??
 |  
 I was trying to describe how her body moves while playing.
 But definitely not "Gyrate", that is going to make her dizzy.
 
 Thanks for your scrutiny. I'll mull it over.
  _________________
 the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins
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		| kokho 进士出身
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-11-30
 帖子: 2642
 来自: Singapore
 kokho北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-02 13:28:01    发表主题: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				| 
 
	  | Lake 写到: |  
	  | 
 
	  | kokho 写到: |  
	  | WELL DONE MY FRIEND   
 Can a nirvana searched be reached?
 
 THIS IS THE SENTENCE I DO NOT UNDERSTAND...
 
 searched = quest ???
 |  
 
   
 I read it somewhere in Rexroth's Complete Poems, something like, a nirvana with desire cannot be reached.
 |  
 Seeking for Nirvana is a quest, not a search for most buddish
  ) _________________
 乒乓、摄影、诗歌
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		| kokho 进士出身
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-11-30
 帖子: 2642
 来自: Singapore
 kokho北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-02 13:30:33    发表主题: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				| 
 
	  | Lake 写到: |  
	  | 
 
	  | kokho 写到: |  
	  | With a standing ovation her heart vibrates.
 
 With  = AFTER ???
 
 .
 |  
 I meant at the same time, because of it, not after.
 |  
 IN RESPONSE TO A STANDING OVATION, HER HEART VIBRATES ??
 
 .. SOMEHOW I FELT THE "WITH" IS OUT OF PLACE ....
 
 .
 _________________
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		| kokho 进士出身
 
  
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 帖子: 2642
 来自: Singapore
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-02 13:32:33    发表主题: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				| 
 
	  | Lake 写到: |  
	  | 
 
	  | kokho 写到: |  
	  | Her head slightly throws back and forth. Her body moves with the bow
 
 HER HEAD GYRATES IN UNISON WITH THE BOW (MELODY) ??
 |  
 I was trying to describe how her body moves while playing.
 But definitely not "Gyrate", that is going to make her dizzy.
 
 Thanks for your scrutiny. I'll mull it over.
  |  
 I BELIEVE YOU CAN FIND A BETTER WORD THAN GYRATES ...
 
 DO TRY TO VISIT WWW.DICTIONARY.COM ... YOU WILL FIND THE RIGHT WORD THERE...
 
 ..
 _________________
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		| Lake 举人
 
  
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-03 05:44:41    发表主题: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				| 
 
	  | kokho 写到: |  
	  | Seeking for Nirvana is a quest, not a search for most buddish
  ) |  
 Ignorant of buddhism, I thought seek, search and quest are synonyms. If not, then a nirvana searched cannot be attained.
 
 Did you suggest "search" be replaced by quest?
 _________________
 the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins
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		| Lake 举人
 
  
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-03 05:46:34    发表主题: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				| 
 
	  | kokho 写到: |  
	  | 
 IN RESPONSE TO A STANDING OVATION, HER HEART VIBRATES ??
 
 .. SOMEHOW I FELT THE "WITH" IS OUT OF PLACE ....
 
 .
 |  
 "Her heart vibrates to the standing ovation", sounds in place?
 _________________
 the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins
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		| Lake 举人
 
  
 注册时间: 2007-01-09
 帖子: 1286
 
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-03 05:54:24    发表主题: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				| 
 
	  | kokho 写到: |  
	  | 
 I BELIEVE YOU CAN FIND A BETTER WORD THAN GYRATES ...
 
 DO TRY TO VISIT WWW.DICTIONARY.COM ... YOU WILL FIND THE RIGHT WORD THERE...
 
 ..
 |  
 Thanks for the link. Still looking. It is not a circular movement.
 "Toss"?
 
 That you raised many questions about this poem really made me happy. Thank you!
 
 Much appreciation,
 
 Lake
 _________________
 the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins
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		| kokho 进士出身
 
  
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 来自: Singapore
 kokho北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-03 10:12:29    发表主题: |   |  
				| 
 |  
				| Discussion make me paying more attention to this second language of ours... 
 
     
 ..
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		| Lake 举人
 
  
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-04 17:26:40    发表主题: |   |  
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 |  
				| (A revision is made based on an English friend's suggestion "my only tentative suggestion is to have a more defined tone of restraint (avoiding the directness of exclamations and questions). " Now all questions and exclamations are eliminated.) 
 As Sakura plunges
 into deep water
 Sayuri plunges, too
 in an affair with a man—
 a mere stranger. Petals
 discolored, mind entombed.
 
 Inevitably, cherry blossoms
 drowned as doomed,
 while Sayuri incarnated
 as Mistress of Chairman—
 her new Danna.
 
 In an ecstasy of joy
 tears streaming down
 her eyes, grey and misty.
 
 As years drift by...
 
 Sayuri and Chairman
 now reside in New York City.
 
 Chairman grows weaker and weaker
 and not long, leaves Sayuri behind.
 Like a kite with a broken string,
 she's more puzzled and scared than sad.
 
 Blown off the branches
 Sakura falls and cries.
 
 Grass turns green and brown.
 At a concert, a slender
 short-haired woman
 in an altered black kimono
 plays a violin with her
 once-Samisen-playing-hands.
 Simple grace and delicacy.
 
 Her eyes half closed.
 Her head slightly throws back and forth.
 Her body moves with the bow
 that sings on her heart-strings.
 
 “Memoirs of a Geisha”.
 
 With a standing ovation
 her heart vibrates.
 Sakura blooms…
 
 .
 _________________
 the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins
 |  | 
	
		| 返页首 |  | 
	
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		| kokho 进士出身
 
  
 注册时间: 2006-11-30
 帖子: 2642
 来自: Singapore
 kokho北美枫文集
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-09 00:19:02    发表主题: |   |  
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 |  
				| 需要时间 ;)) 
 。。
 _________________
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		| Lake 举人
 
  
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				|  发表于: 2007-04-16 12:07:57    发表主题: |   |  
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				| 
 Yes, Sir.
 
 以后什么时候吧。现在没心情。好像有点迷糊,想去研读一下 zen.
  _________________
 the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins
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