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外遇
lingquan.yang
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Joined: 29 Mar 2009
Posts: 70
Location: 中国云南
lingquan.yangCollection
PostPosted: 2009-08-28 14:51:10    Post subject: 外遇 Reply with quote

马路旁,星光灿烂,行人少
我们相互搂着对方的腰
不顾熟人的诧异,你最爱听
我给离异的你念的家庭经

我对女人耳朵的结构及原理
曾下过的功夫太多太深
什么样语音及节律
产生和谐的共鸣容易

我太清楚。女人的防线
处于什么部位,我拿捏得恰到好处
她们的防线从来都是想象的坚固
甜言蜜语的细流腐蚀性也太强

她们善于堵个坝,却不懂
化解和凝固甜言蜜语的化学原理
我就合理不合法又合情
搂住你宽大的臀部往我身上拽拉

你的乳罩太坚挺,我感觉不到
你有柔心和慈怀。你的臀太勤快
为何弄得硬邦邦?女人
这让我怎能把你爱上

你的唾液盐味也太重
我却喜欢香甜的
看来,星光虽灿烂
我们想法虽相同

我们还是没法结出甜果
就像两个半身体,也许
高矮胖瘦不相契
这样的婚姻不合适

我们还是早点再另寻
免得耽误了我,也耽误了你
2009、8、4
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迁客骚人
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Joined: 26 Aug 2009
Posts: 29
Location: 湛江廉江
迁客骚人Collection
PostPosted: 2009-08-28 17:43:08    Post subject: Reply with quote

诗歌的前半部分感觉很好。
后半部分却突显不自然。
整体而言,对于这样的诗歌,还是应该颂扬的。
个人意见。呵呵。
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lingquan.yang
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Joined: 29 Mar 2009
Posts: 70
Location: 中国云南
lingquan.yangCollection
PostPosted: 2009-09-17 20:24:50    Post subject: 中国女性史 Reply with quote








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