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Maple Review Home -> 西方文学　Western Literature

Haiku - Early News (早知)

sfiawong
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Joined: 05 May 2009
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Location: US/HK
sfiawongCollection

Posted: 2009-05-27 17:59:25 Post subject: Haiku - Early News (早知)

Haiku - Early News (早知) Duck is first knowing water The weather changed warm after the winter Swim early with her children 鴨先知水性冬天後的水轉暖兒女早暢泳 (5+7+5,內附一季節性.) _________________ 有評必回應. Love your relatives and friends when they are near you. 我的英文詩: http://poemhunter.com/albert-wong http://facebook.com/sfiawong

Lake
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Joined: 09 Jan 2007
Posts: 1286

LakeCollection

Posted: 2009-05-29 05:14:18 Post subject:

You got the 5/7/5 in Chinese, but a good haiku needs two contrast/comparison images to create that Aha moment, otherwise it is just a pretty scene. Good effort. _________________ the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins

sfiawong
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Joined: 05 May 2009
Posts: 813
Location: US/HK
sfiawongCollection

Posted: 2009-05-29 08:58:26 Post subject:

Lake wrote:

You got the 5/7/5 in Chinese, but a good haiku needs two contrast/comparison images to create that Aha moment, otherwise it is just a pretty scene.
...

Yes, you are right, I have changed it completely with Chinese and English in the right numbers of words.

Thank you !
_________________
有評必回應.
Love your relatives and friends when they are near you.
我的英文詩:
http://poemhunter.com/albert-wong
http://facebook.com/sfiawong

sfiawong
秀才

Joined: 05 May 2009
Posts: 813
Location: US/HK
sfiawongCollection

Posted: 2009-05-29 09:28:26 Post subject:

Both in the Chinese and English must match in the same number of words. (Haiku poetry.) _________________ 有評必回應. Love your relatives and friends when they are near you. 我的英文詩: http://poemhunter.com/albert-wong http://facebook.com/sfiawong

Lake
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Joined: 09 Jan 2007
Posts: 1286

LakeCollection

Posted: 2009-05-29 09:44:39 Post subject:

English haiku is counted by syllables not by words as far as I know. And the modern English haiku has abandoned the 17-syllable rule, it concentrates on other things besides syllable count, and 8-12 syllables is usually preferred in English haiku. Correct me if I'm wrong. _________________ the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins

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