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贺圣朝 抒怀
游向高原的鱼
秀才


Joined: 20 May 2007
Posts: 382

游向高原的鱼Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-20 04:34:43    Post subject: 贺圣朝 抒怀 Reply with quote

贺圣朝 抒怀 [原创 2008-11-15 11:36:09]
字号: 大 中 小
匆匆过眼飞鸿住,挽弓回头去。偷将苦力作敲推,夜阑心如绪。

蹉跎月日,人来几许?可曾同倾诉?高楼烛影总摇摇,一杯空空处。



依照下面词谱《贺胜朝》
平平仄仄平平仄,仄平平平仄。平平仄仄仄平平,仄平平平仄。
··△△···△
平平仄仄,平平仄仄。仄平平平仄。平平仄仄仄平平,仄平平平仄。
····△△···△


下面是过客的原词
酒薄难使留心住,
欲随飞鸿去。
劳人墨客枉寻辞,
费这般思绪。

霜华遍地,诗思几许?
与留骚人诉!
追风坝上驰铁马,
且溶秋浓处。
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人生乃是一面镜子,在其中认识自己。
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-26 13:51:27    Post subject: Reply with quote

韵味浓郁
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冰清
同进士出身


Joined: 29 Mar 2007
Posts: 1921

冰清Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-26 15:10:30    Post subject: Reply with quote

一气浑成, 好词!
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白云闲人
探花


Joined: 26 Aug 2007
Posts: 3466

白云闲人Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-27 06:54:33    Post subject: Reply with quote

抒展情怀,唱和同佳!
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诗中岁月,
笛里关山.
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qinghongh
榜眼


Joined: 14 Oct 2007
Posts: 4110

qinghonghCollection
PostPosted: 2008-11-27 08:21:09    Post subject: Reply with quote

同感!
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又一方天
秀才


Joined: 16 Nov 2006
Posts: 385

又一方天Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-28 23:38:30    Post subject: Reply with quote

步韵作甚佳

问好鱼
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空钩久垂
钓得
烟波月醉
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