Lake 举人
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Joined: 09 Jan 2007 Posts: 1286
LakeCollection |
Posted: 2008-07-19 18:50:51 Post subject: Out in the early morning |
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(旧作,挖出来,经过加工修改,再发。)
Out in the early morning
Dawn, a wooden cabin asleep.
Alone I take a trodden path
to Yellowstone Lake,
where everything is calm, quiet.
A tree trunk lies ashore
half buried in the sand.
I climb on it and sit. Suddenly,
a golden gopher scurries away
under my bare feet
as a line of wild ducks dot the waves,
rising and falling. Not far,
a man is fishing, content,
reminiscent of a legendary old man,
fishing with a straight hook, no bait.
I smile at this thought.
Again, the ripples roll gold and silver
dropped by the new sun.
I regret missing its leaping from the horizon -
its splendor, majesty.
The far ranges are
a mirage in the hazy clouds
while the water murmurs rhythmically
against the shore, as if singing,
"Come earlier next morning."
My book lies forgotten in my hand.
. _________________ the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins |
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mahuairong 童生
Joined: 19 Jul 2008 Posts: 51 Location: Qingdao China mahuairongCollection |
Posted: 2008-07-21 22:33:23 Post subject: |
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Is this idea from one of the ancient Chinese poems? This new version makes me feel calm and content. _________________ You see me, you lose me |
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Lake 举人
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Joined: 09 Jan 2007 Posts: 1286
LakeCollection |
Posted: 2008-07-22 09:53:04 Post subject: |
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It is from my experience of going to Yellowstone Park years ago, though there is a reference of Jiang Taigong in the poem, which is how I felt at that time. Funny.
Of which Chinese poem did this one remind you?
Thanks for reading and commenting.
Lake _________________ the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins |
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William Zhou周道模 探花
Joined: 10 Jun 2007 Posts: 3950 Location: 中国四川广汉 William Zhou周道模Collection |
Posted: 2008-07-23 01:02:01 Post subject: |
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自然美景、动物动态、钓鱼人静态、“我”的情思动态构成了迷人的幻景。
对西方读者来说,去掉“姜太公”的联想那几句可能更自然和谐。 _________________ 诗歌是灵魂的歌唱.
周道模 |
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Lake 举人
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Joined: 09 Jan 2007 Posts: 1286
LakeCollection |
Posted: 2008-07-23 18:14:22 Post subject: |
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谢谢William 的讲评。
William Zhou周道模 wrote: |
对西方读者来说,去掉“姜太公”的联想那几句可能更自然和谐。
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是么?也有可能。 不太清楚。 用了“姜太公”还有一个原因,读西方诗友的诗时,发现他们经常引用典故,宗教,神话等等,看得我好辛苦;“气”不打一处来,也来个以牙还牙。
等会儿,帖一首一位英国朋友的小诗,极富东方韵味呢。
喜欢你的直言,再次感谢! _________________ the trouble with poetry is that it encourages the writing of more poetry -- Billy Collins |
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