Maple Review Home
   Chinese Literature Society of North America | Maple Review | Immigrants in Canada | Angel Studio | The Driftwood Artist Society | Ocean of Poetry | Island of Music
"HuaHe Cup" 2007 Chinese Mainland and Oversea Poetry Competition and Non-governmental Magazines and Newspapers Joint Exhibition starts on the first day of 2007.
  
 FAQFAQ   SearchSearch   MemberlistMemberlist   UsergroupsUsergroups   RegisterRegister  ProfileProfile    Log in to check your private messagesLog in to check your private messages   Sign inSign in   BlogsBlogs    Weblogs NewsWeblogs News   AlbumAlbum 
English Home Bilingual Home Chinese Home
Dictionary Check Poems' Rules & Forms Search for Chinese Poems Poetry & Music

Maple Review Home -> 落尘诗社 Post new topic   Reply to topic
流浪~~
悠子
举人


Joined: 04 Jan 2008
Posts: 1383
Location: US
悠子Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-31 15:09:19    Post subject: 流浪~~ Reply with quote

忘记了幸福在天堂的细节
枝叶,在流失的春天里独唱
记不起秋意萧瑟
给予过属于我们的忧伤

晨曦清澈的想象
渐渐湮没于那片夕阳
烛影慌乱在窗棂
是我今夜难眠的迹象

春天过期的
折叠进尘封的小巷
回顾的阳光,走出一抹沧桑

一个人在异域,流浪

03/31/2008
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
詩盜喜裸評
进士出身


Joined: 15 May 2007
Posts: 2984
Location: 台湾,台北
詩盜喜裸評Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-31 16:07:07    Post subject: Reply with quote

‘的’太频繁,让阅读线条显得僵硬。荡秋千比较好!
_________________
可情可理,去捧就真
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Blog
悠子
举人


Joined: 04 Jan 2008
Posts: 1383
Location: US
悠子Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-31 16:52:42    Post subject: 好久没有听到你严厉的声音了~~接着~~~ Reply with quote

詩盜喜裸評 wrote:
‘的’太频繁,让阅读线条显得僵硬。荡秋千比较好!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
詩盜喜裸評
进士出身


Joined: 15 May 2007
Posts: 2984
Location: 台湾,台北
詩盜喜裸評Collection
PostPosted: 2008-03-31 19:44:14    Post subject: Reply with quote

没说啥哪!还严厉~秋千的方向有问题?
_________________
可情可理,去捧就真
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Blog
悠子
举人


Joined: 04 Jan 2008
Posts: 1383
Location: US
悠子Collection
PostPosted: 2008-04-01 08:25:07    Post subject: 大头朝下了 Reply with quote

詩盜喜裸評 wrote:
没说啥哪!还严厉~秋千的方向有问题?
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
詩盜喜裸評
进士出身


Joined: 15 May 2007
Posts: 2984
Location: 台湾,台北
詩盜喜裸評Collection
PostPosted: 2008-04-01 08:32:19    Post subject: Reply with quote

是这图的景深没处理好,看起来像一列纵队。
_________________
可情可理,去捧就真
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Blog
悠子
举人


Joined: 04 Jan 2008
Posts: 1383
Location: US
悠子Collection
PostPosted: 2008-04-01 08:40:03    Post subject: Reply with quote

就是喜欢这没景深的
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
詩盜喜裸評
进士出身


Joined: 15 May 2007
Posts: 2984
Location: 台湾,台北
詩盜喜裸評Collection
PostPosted: 2008-04-01 09:00:21    Post subject: Reply with quote

你这就是想像与实际的落差。
_________________
可情可理,去捧就真
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Blog
悠子
举人


Joined: 04 Jan 2008
Posts: 1383
Location: US
悠子Collection
PostPosted: 2008-04-01 09:03:43    Post subject: Reply with quote

这个够严厉
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
詩盜喜裸評
进士出身


Joined: 15 May 2007
Posts: 2984
Location: 台湾,台北
詩盜喜裸評Collection
PostPosted: 2008-04-01 09:06:22    Post subject: Reply with quote

对一位唯美主义者而言,我承认~
_________________
可情可理,去捧就真
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Blog
悠子
举人


Joined: 04 Jan 2008
Posts: 1383
Location: US
悠子Collection
PostPosted: 2008-04-01 09:11:08    Post subject: 这就是唯美与唯不美的落差~~ Reply with quote

詩盜喜裸評 wrote:
对一位唯美主义者而言,我承认~
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
啥么
秀才


Joined: 10 Jan 2008
Posts: 169

啥么Collection
PostPosted: 2008-04-01 09:19:06    Post subject: Reply with quote

偶觉得偶是来地球流浪的
_________________
这有点麻烦
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
悠子
举人


Joined: 04 Jan 2008
Posts: 1383
Location: US
悠子Collection
PostPosted: 2008-04-01 09:41:43    Post subject: 啥时候回你的中子星? Reply with quote

啥么 wrote:
偶觉得偶是来地球流浪的
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
是有缘
秀才


Joined: 08 Feb 2008
Posts: 741

是有缘Collection
PostPosted: 2008-04-01 16:12:50    Post subject: Reply with quote

荡着秋千,魂游远方。
_________________
蜻蜓点水非无意 愁云化雨是有情
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
飞狐
童生


Joined: 26 Mar 2008
Posts: 22

飞狐Collection
PostPosted: 2008-04-01 16:25:03    Post subject: Reply with quote

太伤感了!
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
曲元奇
秀才


Joined: 01 Mar 2008
Posts: 427
Location: 山东
曲元奇Collection
PostPosted: 2008-04-01 18:43:01    Post subject: Reply with quote

我想起了一只歌 到处流浪 到处流浪
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
爱爱
秀才


Joined: 03 Feb 2008
Posts: 167

爱爱Collection
PostPosted: 2008-04-01 21:45:01    Post subject: Reply with quote

悠子~~我要跟你一起流浪~
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message
悠子
举人


Joined: 04 Jan 2008
Posts: 1383
Location: US
悠子Collection
PostPosted: 2008-04-03 11:13:58    Post subject: 我和你一起去逛商场~ Reply with quote

爱爱 wrote:
悠子~~我要跟你一起流浪~
Back to top
View user's profile Send private message Blog
Display posts from previous:   
Emoticons
Very Happy Smile Sad Surprised
Shocked Confused Cool Laughing
Mad Razz Embarassed Crying or Very sad
Evil or Very Mad Twisted Evil Rolling Eyes Wink
Exclamation Question Idea Arrow
View more Emoticons
Page 1 of 1           View previous topic View next topic    
Maple Review Home -> 落尘诗社    Post new topic   Reply to topic
Jump to:  


Once you post your works here, that means you submits them to the magazine of Maple Review (North American Maple, or BeiMeiFeng), a bilingual journal published by Chinese Literature Society of North America. The magazine holds the right to translate them into Chinese, and publish them in both languages. You need to be responsible for the copyright issues of your own files uploaded.
Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2005 phpBB Group
phpBB Chinese interface was translated by iCy-fLaME