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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

颓唐的断句

利子
童生

Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 2

利子Collection

Posted: 2006-10-02 08:16:55 Post subject: 颓唐的断句

颓唐的断句（一）重复地拨打一个空号而我究竟想说什么又是对谁我如此无聊活像一个远离尘世的人（二）泥泞的夜在一个人的身体里忍受住黑暗即使滑倒也不必向谁说起你就是那梵高的向日葵（三）要多久你才学会放弃去过大上海到过北京城在广州一家五星级宾馆却放不下一包小小香烟的诱惑（四）一场虚幻的旅行凌晨三点面对面地幸福的美女完成另一个梦一本罗曼司一对野鸳鸯像是受过挤压的铁轨不再发出呓语（五）我不说这些我看见的我全都不说我只说我我有水一样的性格我承载别人看不见的伤痕我的存在是我的奇迹总有一天我会抵达我想抵达的目的地 2006/9/29

赵福治
探花

Joined: 30 May 2006
Posts: 3456
Location: 中国北京
赵福治Collection

Posted: 2006-10-02 19:24:56 Post subject:

在广州一家五星级宾馆却放不下一包小小香烟的诱惑 ......................感悟留驻笔端.问好.

夜来
童生

Joined: 09 Oct 2006
Posts: 20

夜来Collection

Posted: 2006-10-15 09:37:14 Post subject:

重读，提上~

杯中冲浪
进士出身

Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection

Posted: 2006-10-25 17:59:04 Post subject:

内在的东西很坚实，让人想到诗人的彷徨、无助与悲伤。 _________________ 杯中冲浪.披履而行 http://blog.sina.com.cn/shoutao006

左岸
秀才

Joined: 12 Oct 2006
Posts: 215
Location: 中国大连
左岸Collection

Posted: 2006-11-02 02:07:28 Post subject:

泥泞的夜在一个人的身体里忍受住黑暗即使滑倒也不必向谁说起你就是那梵高的向日葵诗精练，凝重，口语的叙述气息拉近了读者的心灵。问好利子 _________________ 黑暗怎样焊住灵魂的银河

墨染红颜
童生

Joined: 08 Oct 2006
Posts: 69

墨染红颜Collection

Posted: 2006-11-02 19:29:03 Post subject:

喜欢这样的句子，学习：） _________________ 风花飞有态，烟絮坠无痕。

鹤雨
秀才

Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 113
Location: 上海
鹤雨Collection

Posted: 2006-11-02 20:21:12 Post subject: 开篇平实，结尾生动了起来，诗人的莫名

感伤抒发是永远的老调新弹，读兄此作令人不禁唏嘘感叹！拜读问好！ _________________ 愿意和大家共同进步!

moonlight
童生

Joined: 25 Dec 2006
Posts: 31
Location: TORONTO
moonlightCollection

Posted: 2008-01-01 03:32:43 Post subject:

飞雪春风又一度, 新朋老友何日归? 遥祝新年快乐

迪拜
同进士出身

Joined: 31 Oct 2006
Posts: 1588

迪拜Collection

Posted: 2008-01-01 16:52:58 Post subject:

不错

阿依琼裙
秀才

Joined: 09 Apr 2007
Posts: 920
Location: 废墟之上
阿依琼裙Collection

Posted: 2008-01-02 00:20:02 Post subject:

我不说这些我看见的我全都不说我只说我我有水一样的性格我承载别人看不见的伤痕我的存在是我的奇迹总有一天我会抵达我想抵达的目的地坚韧的断语~~ 新年快乐 ! _________________ 踏过废墟,走来 http://blog.sina.com.cn/m/weiyurong

了因大兄
秀才

Joined: 15 Nov 2006
Posts: 209

了因大兄Collection

Posted: 2008-01-02 01:39:28 Post subject:

5.喜欢.问好! _________________ 我不是树上的黑木耳，我被爱过不能随随便便不回家 http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1236932795

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