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他乡月, 故乡灯*1[2]  Next
白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-23 19:53:21    Post subject: 他乡月, 故乡灯* Reply with quote

他乡月, 故乡灯*

交融. 在夜一般神秘莫测的湖面上
或龙凤, 或鲲鹏
而绝不是比翼双飞的鸟
把火与水, 海与空
还有江南的丝竹
塞北弯弓 一同
溶入他乡硕大的明月
朦胧的波光

苍白的手指滑过冰冷
我不敢触摸
那修炼千年的娘子, 一杯美酒醉了
鳞甲不再的身
妖孽!......? 海啸淹没的
是水的温柔
雷峰塔倒了
黄沙滚滚的丝绸之路
铜车马载不动蚕茧*那秦朝的女子
哭喊而来, 一路追寻…….这里
已是海的尽头, 可有浮槎*我
向天问

此刻 夜
无声, 你无声, 皓月无声, 水
也无声. 安大略湖睡了
平静的如同
我 微笑的唇

你 伸出一介书生并不强悍的臂膀
拥紧我
今夜的颤栗. 我 用我
东方女性黑色的瞳仁
掩埋 昨日的空灵

远方, 悠然而抵的
是归巢的水鸟
两只乌黑, 两只雪白

*自贡花灯在TORONTO CNE国家展览馆展出
*蚕茧龙灯, 描写丝绸之路的故事
*浮槎. 传说中自由运行于海天之间的筏
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赵福治
探花


Joined: 30 May 2006
Posts: 3456
Location: 中国北京
赵福治Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-23 22:13:40    Post subject: Reply with quote

远方, 悠然而抵的
是归巢的水鸟
两只乌黑, 两只雪白 。。。。。。。。诗意纵横,尤其喜欢结尾。
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下一个偶像是野兽
秀才


Joined: 16 Jan 2007
Posts: 504
Location: 西安
下一个偶像是野兽Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-24 06:10:58    Post subject: Reply with quote

今夜的颤栗. 我 用我
东方女性黑色的瞳仁
掩埋 昨日的空灵

远方, 悠然而抵的
是归巢的水鸟
两只乌黑, 两只雪白

--------------------------
很有味道。问好,拜读
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刘雨萍
秀才


Joined: 25 Jan 2007
Posts: 226
Location: Houston, TX. U.S.A
刘雨萍Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-24 16:45:07    Post subject: Reply with quote

白水兄总是能从现实场景里提纯一个诗意来. 久违了, 以往的几个月, 因许多事情给了自己偷懒的借口. 重新回来,感觉更温暖. 中秋快乐.
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隔海抒情
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杯中冲浪
进士出身


Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-24 19:04:30    Post subject: Reply with quote

远方, 悠然而抵的
是归巢的水鸟
两只乌黑, 两只雪白
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杯中冲浪.披履而行
http://blog.sina.com.cn/shoutao006
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迪拜
同进士出身


Joined: 31 Oct 2006
Posts: 1588

迪拜Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-24 19:16:55    Post subject: Reply with quote

白水先生

这首诗歌比前面几首都好

前面,多为技巧

这是真情

很欣赏.
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kokho
进士出身


Joined: 30 Nov 2006
Posts: 2642
Location: Singapore
kokhoCollection
PostPosted: 2007-09-25 01:21:55    Post subject: Reply with quote

神秘主义的色彩。。。

。。
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乒乓、摄影、诗歌
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-25 05:49:14    Post subject: Reply with quote

赵福治 wrote:
远方, 悠然而抵的
是归巢的水鸟
两只乌黑, 两只雪白 。。。。。。。。诗意纵横,尤其喜欢结尾。

谢谢鼓励.遥祝中秋快乐
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-25 05:57:10    Post subject: Reply with quote

下一个偶像是野兽 wrote:
今夜的颤栗. 我 用我
东方女性黑色的瞳仁
掩埋 昨日的空灵

远方, 悠然而抵的
是归巢的水鸟
两只乌黑, 两只雪白

--------------------------
很有味道。问好,拜读


谢谢半个老乡.遥祝中秋快乐
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-25 05:59:45    Post subject: Reply with quote

刘雨萍 wrote:
白水兄总是能从现实场景里提纯一个诗意来. 久违了, 以往的几个月, 因许多事情给了自己偷懒的借口. 重新回来,感觉更温暖. 中秋快乐.


雨萍回来了, 看见你真高兴. 家里还好吗? 现在是在国内还是国外?
问好中秋 Very Happy
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-25 06:02:16    Post subject: Reply with quote

杯中冲浪 wrote:
远方, 悠然而抵的
是归巢的水鸟
两只乌黑, 两只雪白


http://www.bokee.net/includes/zhongqiu.jsp?stra=%E6%9D%AF%E4%B8%AD%E5%86%B2%E6%B5%AA
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-25 06:08:23    Post subject: Reply with quote

迪拜 wrote:
白水先生

这首诗歌比前面几首都好

前面,多为技巧

这是真情

很欣赏.


不是吧 Confused 我的诗歌不论技巧高低好坏, 只有一条是真的, 就是情感(无论喜怒哀乐) Razz
严格说, 这首写的比较白, 再就是沉淀了一段时间. 这是月前和先生一起去观自贡灯展后写的.

问好中秋
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-25 06:28:51    Post subject: Reply with quote

kokho wrote:
神秘主义的色彩。。。

。。


问好KOK, 中秋快乐 Very Happy
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韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-25 06:30:09    Post subject: Reply with quote

远方, 悠然而抵的
是归巢的水鸟
两只乌黑, 两只雪白

中秋快乐!
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靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345
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半溪明月
榜眼


Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-25 06:37:42    Post subject: Reply with quote

远方, 悠然而抵的
是归巢的水鸟
两只乌黑, 两只雪白

欣赏学习~问好白水妹妹中秋快乐!
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彭世学
秀才


Joined: 24 Jun 2007
Posts: 187
Location: 中国
彭世学Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-25 15:14:14    Post subject: Reply with quote

今夜的颤栗. 我 用我
东方女性黑色的瞳仁
掩埋 昨日的空灵

远方, 悠然而抵的
是归巢的水鸟
两只乌黑, 两只雪白

令人回味与想象!问好!
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认为诗是悬崖上的孤松,栖鸟是她唯一的养料
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kokho
进士出身


Joined: 30 Nov 2006
Posts: 2642
Location: Singapore
kokhoCollection
PostPosted: 2007-09-26 12:21:56    Post subject: Reply with quote

开始很好。。

令人回味与想象!问好!

《》这个有点意外 :)

。。
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乒乓、摄影、诗歌
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杨海军
进士出身


Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-26 18:32:37    Post subject: Reply with quote

你 伸出一介书生并不强悍的臂膀
拥紧我
今夜的颤栗. 我 用我
东方女性黑色的瞳仁
掩埋 昨日的空灵

远方, 悠然而抵的
是归巢的水鸟
两只乌黑, 两只雪白

好!!!!
_________________
走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮
——拙作《离开村庄》
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-30 21:26:22    Post subject: Reply with quote

谢谢各位朋友, 问好国庆
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荷梦
进士出身


Joined: 19 Dec 2006
Posts: 2826
Location: 湖北,黄梅
荷梦Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-01 05:14:52    Post subject: Reply with quote

读白水的这首诗有大气之感,只是疑惑,怎么对白水的称呼混乱了,看着有人称兄呢! Question Embarassed
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