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短信一则
悟兮轩居士
童生


Joined: 25 Nov 2008
Posts: 5

悟兮轩居士Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-25 16:30:52    Post subject: 短信一则 Reply with quote

不论是干是歇,心情愉快为先。
别说挣多挣少,量力而行就好。
人生一世往来,听凭天地安排。
珍惜现在所得,健康就是富有。
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-26 14:09:37    Post subject: Reply with quote

问好新朋友, 很理性的诗歌. 提点小建议, 诗歌多增加点延展性会更好些. 己见, 不妥见谅.
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悟兮轩居士
童生


Joined: 25 Nov 2008
Posts: 5

悟兮轩居士Collection
PostPosted: 2008-11-27 06:54:10    Post subject: 谢谢 Reply with quote

小处着眼,是我们作诗的基本。谢谢指教。
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