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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

我的学生王璨的诗歌《手——纪念5.12汶川地震》

陈若祥
秀才

Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 470
Location: 中国*安徽
陈若祥Collection

Posted: 2008-06-10 16:16:04 Post subject: 我的学生王璨的诗歌《手——纪念5.12汶川地震》

手 ——纪念5.12汶川地震 ◆高二（9）班王璨我看见一双稚嫩的手在废墟中向我摇晃每根手指上都绽放着对生的渴望可现在它已经枯萎成一片片凋零的花瓣我看见一双温柔的手手掌中写满了母爱的艰辛和幸福为了身下的花朵不被夭折这双手已经血肉模糊伤痕累累我看见一双双有力的手有百分之一的希望就要付出百分之百的努力它们让花朵不再枯萎它们让大地不再震颤我看见一双巨大的手九百六十万平方公里是它的面积它正用爱的温度在轻轻地抚摩着汶川，这块美丽而可爱的土地

nobody
进士出身

Joined: 31 Dec 2006
Posts: 2651
Location: Madtown
nobodyCollection

Posted: 2008-06-10 21:12:31 Post subject:

还不错。每根手指上都绽放着对生的渴望。。。对生的渴望有什么可歌可泣的吗？还绽放？哈哈。人求生本能而已，平铺直叙即可。 _________________ I'm nobody! Who are you?

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

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