拈花微笑
秀才
Joined: 21 Jan 2008
Posts: 311
拈花微笑Collection |
 Posted: 2008-02-17 09:31:10 Post subject: 晨雨 |
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雨敲着一只铜盆
突然闯进我的早晨
而你的笑摇着一只银铃
格格地任性逃逸
整个世界
当当叮叮
这梦醒的一刻
真安静
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红袖添乱
秀才
Joined: 09 Jan 2008
Posts: 778
红袖添乱Collection |
| Posted: 2008-02-17 12:38:53 Post subject: |
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抓回来~~
不过可能就没那么安静了
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梦的一端是我脉脉的凝视，
而另一端是你清澈的眼睛。 |
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拈花微笑
秀才
Joined: 21 Jan 2008
Posts: 311
拈花微笑Collection |
| Posted: 2008-02-17 13:44:07 Post subject: |
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| 红袖添乱 wrote: |
抓回来~~
不过可能就没那么安静了 |
嗯，会有满天的笑声雨声... 
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詩盜喜裸評
进士出身
Joined: 15 May 2007
Posts: 2984
Location: 台湾，台北
詩盜喜裸評Collection |
| Posted: 2008-02-17 16:26:31 Post subject: |
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逃逸用的生动，两段对比强烈又不扞格。
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可情可理，去捧就真 |
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苏茉儿
秀才
Joined: 31 Dec 2007
Posts: 739
苏茉儿Collection |
| Posted: 2008-02-18 17:55:18 Post subject: |
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嗯，下雨了，你安静的是梦，我安静的是心。
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默默无言处，盈盈一笑间。 |
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悠子
举人
Joined: 04 Jan 2008
Posts: 1383
Location: US
悠子Collection |
| Posted: 2008-02-18 19:19:28 Post subject: |
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| 下雨天，好梦~ |
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爱爱
秀才
Joined: 03 Feb 2008
Posts: 167
爱爱Collection |
| Posted: 2008-02-20 07:41:20 Post subject: |
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而你的笑摇着一只银铃
格格地任性逃逸
很真实,很有动感,喜欢~ |
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是有缘
秀才
Joined: 08 Feb 2008
Posts: 741
是有缘Collection |
| Posted: 2008-02-20 16:34:45 Post subject: |
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心底的微笑。
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蜻蜓点水非无意 愁云化雨是有情 |
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