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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌 Post new topic   Reply to topic
【这一次,我彻底病了】 Previous  [1]2
詩盜喜裸評
进士出身


Joined: 15 May 2007
Posts: 2984
Location: 台湾,台北
詩盜喜裸評Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-10 04:34:30    Post subject: Reply with quote

一二段還行,這句很好(动一动,就听到什么在落)第三段是敗筆!
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可情可理,去捧就真
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韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-10 12:37:46    Post subject: Reply with quote

最近忙得很,很少上论坛.问好! 感谢你们大家对论坛的精心呵护!
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靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345
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半溪明月
榜眼


Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-10 12:53:47    Post subject: Reply with quote

问好少君,莞君和诗盗~
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詩盜喜裸評
进士出身


Joined: 15 May 2007
Posts: 2984
Location: 台湾,台北
詩盜喜裸評Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-11 05:19:13    Post subject: Reply with quote

終於遇上您啦!問好~

白小姐特意委託我向您問好,您好啊!))))37
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嘉慕思
童生


Joined: 12 Jan 2008
Posts: 78
Location: 佳木斯
嘉慕思Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-13 16:25:01    Post subject: Reply with quote

你病了
在患处贴一片梅花呀

嫣红的小伤口
对着溪水和明月吟唱
对着忧郁的气质吟唱

对着嘉慕思
吟唱
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半溪明月
榜眼


Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-13 16:45:36    Post subject: Reply with quote

嘉慕思 wrote:
你病了
...


这几句不错哦~
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半溪明月
榜眼


Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection
PostPosted: 2008-01-13 16:50:38    Post subject: Reply with quote

詩盜喜裸評 wrote:
終於遇上您啦!問好~

白小姐特意委託我向您問好,您好啊!))))37




呵呵,小嘴真甜哈~ Smile
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