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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

小诗一首，请各位批

朵朵
童生

Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 3

朵朵Collection

Posted: 2007-11-22 00:17:55 Post subject: 小诗一首，请各位批

家园而此时多么想拭去眼角最后一滴泪你告诉我家园就在那儿我们盼望已久的地方有森林和草原还有一条小河在门前流过我们的花园盛开在阳光下那些果实多么美那些花朵和孩子多么美我可以眯起眼睛等你悄悄来到我的身旁却佯装不知看你孩子似的得意笑容装满世间最美的纯粹在夜晚月亮相约星星它们不知道我们早就依偎在一起看它们好奇的神情眨啊眨还有什么比这更美那样的生活我要与你共同度过那些花朵和孩子那些眯起眼睛享受的阳光还有我们说也说不完的情意

半溪明月
榜眼

Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection

Posted: 2007-11-22 01:38:07 Post subject:

美好,轻柔舒缓的倾诉~欣赏!

白水
大学士

Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection

Posted: 2007-11-22 04:03:08 Post subject:

我可以眯起眼睛等你悄悄来到我的身旁却佯装不知看你孩子似的得意笑容装满世间最美的纯粹写的自然, 流畅. 温馨却透着顽皮. 连笔名也很有趣. 欢迎新朋友

杯中冲浪
进士出身

Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection

Posted: 2007-11-22 04:03:53 Post subject:

欢迎朵朵。 _________________ 杯中冲浪.披履而行 http://blog.sina.com.cn/shoutao006

kokho
进士出身

Joined: 30 Nov 2006
Posts: 2642
Location: Singapore
kokhoCollection

Posted: 2007-11-22 14:15:40 Post subject:

。很阳光的诗歌：0 。。 _________________ 乒乓、摄影、诗歌

朵朵
童生

Joined: 22 Nov 2007
Posts: 3

朵朵Collection

Posted: 2007-11-22 16:39:40 Post subject:

谢谢大家!

韩少君
进士出身

Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection

Posted: 2007-11-22 17:57:53 Post subject:

欢迎朵朵儿清纯而充满情意，欣赏！ _________________ 靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345

杨海军
进士出身

Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection

Posted: 2007-11-27 01:55:27 Post subject:

特殊提一下这首诗！！！欢迎多来！祝诗人愉快！！ _________________ 走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮 ——拙作《离开村庄》 http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751

kokho
进士出身

Joined: 30 Nov 2006
Posts: 2642
Location: Singapore
kokhoCollection

Posted: 2007-11-27 12:22:45 Post subject:

帖子 Post发表于 Posted: 星期四十一月 22, 2007 12:17 am 发表主题 Post subject: 小诗一首，请各位批引用并回复 Reply with quote 编辑/删除帖子 Edit/Delete this post 删除这个帖子 Delete this post 浏览发表者的IP地址 View IP address of poster 家园而此时多么想拭去眼角最后一滴泪你告诉我家园就在那儿我们盼望已久的地方有森林和草原还有一条小河在门前流过我们的花园盛开在阳光下那些果实多么美那些花朵和孩子多么美我可以眯起眼睛等你悄悄来到我的身旁却佯装不知看你孩子似的得意笑容装满世间最美的纯粹《》恋爱的美好　：）。。 _________________ 乒乓、摄影、诗歌

杨海军
进士出身

Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection

Posted: 2007-11-27 17:22:18 Post subject:

再读这首诗，仍感清静和清纯。好！！多贴些来欣赏！ _________________ 走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮 ——拙作《离开村庄》 http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751

彭世学
秀才

Joined: 24 Jun 2007
Posts: 187
Location: 中国
彭世学Collection

Posted: 2007-11-29 06:00:14 Post subject:

浪漫温馨的爱情！欣赏！！问好朵朵！！！ _________________ 认为诗是悬崖上的孤松，栖鸟是她唯一的养料我的博客： http://blog.sina.com.cn/pengshixue 《网文荟萃》报：http://bbs.wangwenw.com/index.asp

古井
秀才

Joined: 01 Jun 2007
Posts: 190

古井Collection

Posted: 2007-11-29 07:19:41 Post subject:

好性情哦

迪拜
同进士出身

Joined: 31 Oct 2006
Posts: 1588

迪拜Collection

Posted: 2007-11-29 18:06:57 Post subject:

这样，可能更好，是很好的抒情诗歌。《家园》而此时多么想拭去眼角最后一滴泪你告诉我家园就在那儿我们盼望已久的地方有森林和草原还有一条小河在门前流过我们的花园盛开在阳光下那些果实多么美那些花朵和孩子多么美在夜晚月亮相约星星它们不知道我们早就依偎在一起看它们好奇的神情眨啊眨还有什么比这更美那样的生活我要与你共同度过那些花朵和孩子那些眯起眼睛享受的阳光

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

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