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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

黑夜打此路过

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韩少君
进士出身

Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection

Posted: 2007-11-06 19:54:34 Post subject: 黑夜打此路过

黑夜打此路过黑夜最先撮在墙角里一个农民蹲坐的姿势被纸烟照了一下黑夜卷曲在梳子上一把粗糙的梨木的旧梳子像卷曲的猫咪黑夜贴在陈六儿的颧骨下边陈六儿是在我家寄宿的孤儿也是我最小的舅舅黑夜穿过灯芯穿过母亲的胸膛母亲试图把灯拨亮点儿让小舅的眼圈少一点黑灯灭了母亲好象骂了她男人一句又没油了这些就发生在我的枕边发生在朦胧的刚才---- 低矮的房屋泥泞的乡道以众多不同的姿态接受了黑暗鸡叫的时候有位妇女肯定在井沿打水黑夜,蹑手蹑脚地进村惊慌失措地逃了 _________________ 靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345

莞君
秀才

Joined: 20 Oct 2007
Posts: 561
Location: 中国陕西
莞君Collection

Posted: 2007-11-06 23:43:19 Post subject: 提纯熟的诗歌

问好先生 _________________ 莞君

半溪明月
榜眼

Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection

Posted: 2007-11-07 01:29:29 Post subject:

黑暗终归过去了~这一首不错,问好少君!

陶杰
童生

Joined: 24 Feb 2007
Posts: 96

陶杰Collection

Posted: 2007-11-07 06:26:11 Post subject:

喜欢这首！问好老哥！

舒中
秀才

Joined: 11 Feb 2007
Posts: 133

舒中Collection

Posted: 2007-11-07 06:44:50 Post subject:

黑夜在诗歌里复活，带来艺术之歌。拜读

杨海军
进士出身

Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection

Posted: 2007-11-07 17:28:06 Post subject:

好诗！问候少君！！ _________________ 走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮 ——拙作《离开村庄》 http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751

迪拜
同进士出身

Joined: 31 Oct 2006
Posts: 1588

迪拜Collection

Posted: 2007-11-07 17:48:44 Post subject:

写的不错

白水
大学士

Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection

Posted: 2007-11-07 21:28:44 Post subject:

有位妇女肯定在井沿打水黑夜,蹑手蹑脚地进村惊慌失措地逃了很有感觉. 提

遛达的七七
秀才

Joined: 07 Jun 2006
Posts: 329

遛达的七七Collection

Posted: 2007-11-07 21:58:44 Post subject:

打此路过，我接受你的黑暗这个很不错 7

韩少君
进士出身

Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection

Posted: 2007-11-08 21:54:46 Post subject:

向莞君半溪明月陶杰舒中杨海军迪拜白水 Moonlight 七小姐各位诗人一并致谢! 最近特忙,回帖太少,特此致歉! 祝各位丰收! _________________ 靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345

古井
秀才

Joined: 01 Jun 2007
Posts: 190

古井Collection

Posted: 2007-11-09 00:16:05 Post subject:

很生活化的诗歌，问好！

韩少君
进士出身

Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection

Posted: 2007-11-12 15:57:50 Post subject:

回谢古井,愿共勉! _________________ 靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345

蓝郁
童生

Joined: 13 Nov 2007
Posts: 37

蓝郁Collection

Posted: 2007-11-14 19:08:04 Post subject:

卑微的生存姿态，平淡日子里温暖的光亮。拜读。

彭世学
秀才

Joined: 24 Jun 2007
Posts: 187
Location: 中国
彭世学Collection

Posted: 2007-11-15 02:21:58 Post subject:

黑夜最先撮在墙角里一个农民蹲坐的姿势父亲被纸烟照了一下细节描写很传神！欣赏！！问好！！！ _________________ 认为诗是悬崖上的孤松，栖鸟是她唯一的养料我的博客： http://blog.sina.com.cn/pengshixue 《网文荟萃》报：http://bbs.wangwenw.com/index.asp

莞君
秀才

Joined: 20 Oct 2007
Posts: 561
Location: 中国陕西
莞君Collection

Posted: 2007-11-15 11:28:15 Post subject:

再赏好诗问好 _________________ 莞君

水手
童生

Joined: 29 Sep 2007
Posts: 46
Location: 四平
水手Collection

Posted: 2007-11-16 16:23:27 Post subject:

拜读！学习。问好！ _________________ 友爱-坚定-乐观-

吉祥女巫
童生

Joined: 12 Nov 2007
Posts: 63
Location: 江苏连云港
吉祥女巫Collection

Posted: 2007-11-16 22:23:07 Post subject:

欣赏你的诗　　问好

荷梦
进士出身

Joined: 19 Dec 2006
Posts: 2826
Location: 湖北，黄梅
荷梦Collection

Posted: 2007-11-17 02:24:10 Post subject:

童年的场景，温暖温馨的平凡。

杨海军
进士出身

Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection

Posted: 2007-11-17 05:44:51 Post subject:

好诗！学习！ _________________ 走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮 ——拙作《离开村庄》 http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751

韩少君
进士出身

Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection

Posted: 2007-11-18 16:17:24 Post subject:

谢蓝郁、彭世学、莞君、水手、吉祥巫女、荷梦、杨海军评读！问候大家好！ _________________ 靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345

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