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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌 Post new topic   Reply to topic
少林.嵩山 书画诗词赛
顾小花
童生


Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Posts: 80
Location: 中国南京
顾小花Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-15 19:06:37    Post subject: 少林.嵩山 书画诗词赛 Reply with quote

剑从梦里来
---写给少林
远离一片月光,或者
从云层里,翻出一些传说
听着,剑气划开波浪的声音
一匹白马,痛饮黄河水

是秋风,撞乱了一个年代的身体
一缕烟要覆盖所有的雾
只有英雄,在石缝里低吼
那些浴血的赤裸,映在古道

最后一曲,佳人携琴而来
挥动牧羊的鞭子
山很宁静,归途隐在烟雨中
我没剃光头,只好做梦

云停留的地方
---写给嵩山
云来之前,层层打开心灵
以及诗经。想象星辰
想象达摩渡江的芦苇
晨钟惊醒飞鸟,惊走林间小溪

今世,不选择面壁或打坐
看着峻极于天的风景,随李耳
牵一只青牛,放逐道教的秋色
和错过的花季

放下的不止呼吸
还有年轮的班驳,扯下云朵
神话悠扬,起舞山间
谁也未曾握住天空
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-16 08:51:41    Post subject: Reply with quote

善用隐喻, 文笔娴熟优美. 提读.

有时间盼与大家多交流.问好.
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顾小花
童生


Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Posts: 80
Location: 中国南京
顾小花Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-16 20:09:32    Post subject: Reply with quote

白水 Moonlight wrote:
善用隐喻, 文笔娴熟优美. 提读.

有时间盼与大家多交流.问好.

问好 ,小草也想多来呢,只是无论在家还是在单位,打开北美枫的网页都挺困难,所以来得少了,争取吧.谢谢大家的关心.
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杨海军
进士出身


Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-16 20:35:16    Post subject: Reply with quote

觉得不错!!问候小花诗人
_________________
走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮
——拙作《离开村庄》
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751
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半溪明月
榜眼


Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-16 21:53:51    Post subject: Reply with quote

喜欢你的诗歌,九寨沟给我印象深刻~ Very Happy
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nobody
进士出身


Joined: 31 Dec 2006
Posts: 2651
Location: Madtown
nobodyCollection
PostPosted: 2007-10-17 01:14:54    Post subject: Reply with quote

保持一贯水准。
还戴耳机呢,扮孙道临给我军发密码 Laughing
_________________
I'm nobody! Who are you?
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顾小花
童生


Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Posts: 80
Location: 中国南京
顾小花Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-19 00:02:22    Post subject: Reply with quote

杨海军 wrote:
觉得不错!!问候小花诗人

晕了,可别这么喊,那是有压力的....
_________________
春风吹又生:http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1285636777
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顾小花
童生


Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Posts: 80
Location: 中国南京
顾小花Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-19 00:04:19    Post subject: Reply with quote

半溪明月 wrote:
喜欢你的诗歌,九寨沟给我印象深刻~ Very Happy


谢谢明月记得,请多指教.
_________________
春风吹又生:http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1285636777
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顾小花
童生


Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Posts: 80
Location: 中国南京
顾小花Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-19 00:07:17    Post subject: Reply with quote

nobody wrote:
保持一贯水准。
还戴耳机呢,扮孙道临给我军发密码 Laughing


呵呵,密码你可收到了?问好
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赵雅君
童生


Joined: 07 Aug 2007
Posts: 99

赵雅君Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-19 03:07:51    Post subject: Reply with quote

虽不相识,但早已喜欢上你的诗。收藏了你的那组《云南的云》,每每读来都很怡心怡情。作为女诗人,你的诗跳出“自我”,不矫情造作,与自然、与生命呼应,达观、自然、亲切,能够把自己写的过程与读者读的过程变成一个完整的审美过程,创作日臻成熟。按照这个方向写下去,会有大收获的。期待你写出更多好诗。问好!
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赵福治
探花


Joined: 30 May 2006
Posts: 3456
Location: 中国北京
赵福治Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-29 23:04:44    Post subject: Reply with quote

赵雅君 wrote:
虽不相识,但早已喜欢上你的诗。收藏了你的那组《云南的云》,每每读来都很怡心怡情。作为女诗人,你的诗跳出“自我”,不矫情造作,与自然、与生命呼应,达观、自然、亲切,能够把自己写的过程与读者读的过程变成一个完整的审美过程,创作日臻成熟。按照这个方向写下去,会有大收获的。期待你写出更多好诗。问好!

同感,多发好作品。握手。
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顾小花
童生


Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Posts: 80
Location: 中国南京
顾小花Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-30 20:10:10    Post subject: Reply with quote

赵雅君 wrote:
虽不相识,但早已喜欢上你的诗。收藏了你的那组《云南的云》,每每读来都很怡心怡情。作为女诗人,你的诗跳出“自我”,不矫情造作,与自然、与生命呼应,达观、自然、亲切,能够把自己写的过程与读者读的过程变成一个完整的审美过程,创作日臻成熟。按照这个方向写下去,会有大收获的。期待你写出更多好诗。问好!


谢谢这份陌生的友情,让我感动,之前写点字,为养心,现在觉得很美好,因为有你们.远握.
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顾小花
童生


Joined: 23 Aug 2007
Posts: 80
Location: 中国南京
顾小花Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-30 20:57:05    Post subject: Reply with quote

赵福治 wrote:
赵雅君 wrote:
虽不相识,但早已喜欢上你的诗。收藏了你的那组《云南的云》,每每读来都很怡心怡情。作为女诗人,你的诗跳出“自我”,不矫情造作,与自然、与生命呼应,达观、自然、亲切,能够把自己写的过程与读者读的过程变成一个完整的审美过程,创作日臻成熟。按照这个方向写下去,会有大收获的。期待你写出更多好诗。问好!

同感,多发好作品。握手。

谢谢赵老师的支持.我会努力的.
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