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(投稿)生存状态
东雪西雨
童生


Joined: 10 Feb 2007
Posts: 51
Location: 江苏张家港
东雪西雨Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-12 01:04:57    Post subject: (投稿)生存状态 Reply with quote

1、孤独

早晨,沿路的事物大致不变
与原先一样,一个我
另一个我,路过车窗
各自闯过心事的红灯后,为了生存
必须再次相遇,之后
我们歃血为盟
可是,兄弟啊
你却在夜里花完了我全部的积蓄
就在一首诗快要结尾的时候
将我一刀杀死

2、病房

你走之后,你的敌人把我送进医院
我成了本季度最优秀的病人
这并非是我的初衷,我是想
和孤独兄弟言归于好,然后
把针头插进他的血管
一些医生,可以把病历折好
藏到我下一声,更加联贯的
咳嗽里

3、工作

很多人都在工作,但很多人
并不知道他们在做什么,他们和我一样
神色诡秘,一照面
露出些往日的牙缝来,他们试图
从别人的嘴里拔出些嫩草
喂养自己的马匹
最后,他们都在一声叹息中
躲到自己的房间
镶上假牙

4、睡眠

剩下的就是做梦,或者
什么也不做,好在醒来时
什么也不记得,昨天没有被颠覆
只是夜里有一小片梦
从窗户溜走,正好落在
城市的空地上,这赤足的冬天
我把诗歌放在地上,皱巴巴的字
让路过的人,扔下一枚
简单的硬币
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让自己的思想处于零点
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杯中冲浪
进士出身


Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-12 02:34:00    Post subject: Reply with quote

发散的很大,收拢的不是很好,所以,读的时候,那种快感总是时时被中断。
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杯中冲浪.披履而行
http://blog.sina.com.cn/shoutao006
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柿子
秀才


Joined: 25 Sep 2007
Posts: 137
Location: 中国河南商丘职业技术学院大一
柿子Collection
PostPosted: 2007-10-13 06:54:12    Post subject: Reply with quote

不过整体还是很不错的,如果稍加修改一下的话,一定会好上加精的。呵呵~问好朋友~
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心到、意到。
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