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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

从去年的麦地长出了今年的麦子

杯中冲浪
进士出身

Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
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Posted: 2007-10-05 04:23:05 Post subject: 从去年的麦地长出了今年的麦子

从去年的麦地长出了今年的麦子麦穗及芒全一色的草绿 24度最宜人的空气里，有猫叫春的躁一只狗和另一只狗紧追不舍所有的花都火一样的烧唯有它，朴素的小麦花雪白雪白的安宁啊，我多么幸运，我归属于吃小麦的人类我每天吃着雪白的面粉并且模仿着它的样子繁衍子孙 2007-5-5 蝉在看我在众多的盘子之中，独它睁一只明眸看我于是我突然羞于咀嚼我害羞的厉害而且搞不清谁在谁的洞外谁被谁咀嚼我仓惶出逃吱的一哮，它于我脊后大笑 2007-10-5 _________________ 杯中冲浪.披履而行 http://blog.sina.com.cn/shoutao006

白水
大学士

Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection

Posted: 2007-10-05 05:29:30 Post subject:

冲浪, 你的诗歌越写越好了. 耐品.我都读出了感动. 问好

半溪明月
榜眼

Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection

Posted: 2007-10-05 06:23:49 Post subject:

朴素的小麦花雪白雪白的安宁借物言志～第二首耐嚼有味～：）

杯中冲浪
进士出身

Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection

Posted: 2007-10-05 07:21:14 Post subject:

白水 Moonlight wrote:

冲浪, 你的诗歌越写越好了. 耐品.我都读出了感动.
问好

多谢勉励，不进步对不起朋友们啊。
_________________
杯中冲浪.披履而行
http://blog.sina.com.cn/shoutao006

杯中冲浪
进士出身

Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection

Posted: 2007-10-05 07:22:15 Post subject:

半溪明月 wrote:

朴素的小麦花
雪白雪白的安宁

借物言志～

第二首耐嚼有味～：）

谢谢半溪。
_________________
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司马策风
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Joined: 03 Dec 2006
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Posted: 2007-10-05 20:26:57 Post subject:

第一首，简朴有深意，令人感动；第二首，形象有寓意，教人思索。问好浪兄！ _________________ 《北美枫》司马策风文集 http://www.maplereview.org/best.php?t=8676

hepingdao
Site Admin

Joined: 25 May 2006
Posts: 8106

hepingdaoCollection

Posted: 2007-10-05 20:32:05 Post subject:

很巧妙握手了 _________________ 为网友服务: 端茶倒水勤打扫!

迪拜
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Joined: 31 Oct 2006
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迪拜Collection

Posted: 2007-10-06 00:17:02 Post subject:

相对来说，《从去年的麦地长出今年的麦子》闲淡中，给人以思索，更体现了“诗品” 而，《蝉在看我》对于当今诗坛，如此的风格太多了，不算出众，对冲浪先生，要求必须高一点。

William Zhou周道模
探花

Joined: 10 Jun 2007
Posts: 3950
Location: 中国四川广汉
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Posted: 2007-10-07 16:04:24 Post subject:

赞赏迪拜评诗的态度和水平！ _________________ 诗歌是灵魂的歌唱. 周道模

杯中冲浪
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Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
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Posted: 2007-10-07 20:36:54 Post subject:

司马策风 wrote:

第一首，简朴有深意，令人感动；第二首，形象有寓意，教人思索。

问好浪兄！

久违了，大司马。
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杯中冲浪
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Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection

Posted: 2007-10-07 20:38:16 Post subject:

hepingdao wrote:

很巧妙

握手了

希望来点批评。
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杯中冲浪
进士出身

Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection

Posted: 2007-10-07 20:40:20 Post subject:

迪拜 wrote:

相对来说，《从去年的麦地长出今年的麦子》

闲淡中，给人以思索，更体现了“诗品”

而，《蝉在看我》

对于当今诗坛，如此的风格太多了，

不算出众，

对冲浪先生，要求必须高一点。

评得好，第一首诗是旧诗，写的时间长一些，里面有一些感觉，后一首太匆忙。
_________________
杯中冲浪.披履而行
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杯中冲浪
进士出身

Joined: 29 Sep 2006
Posts: 2891
Location: 中国
杯中冲浪Collection

Posted: 2007-10-07 20:41:08 Post subject:

William Zhou周道模 wrote:

赞赏迪拜评诗的态度和水平！

握手。
_________________
杯中冲浪.披履而行
http://blog.sina.com.cn/shoutao006

William Zhou周道模
探花

Joined: 10 Jun 2007
Posts: 3950
Location: 中国四川广汉
William Zhou周道模Collection

Posted: 2007-10-08 00:09:16 Post subject:

握手。杯中也能海啸啊！ _________________ 诗歌是灵魂的歌唱. 周道模

梅影三叠
秀才

Joined: 06 Feb 2007
Posts: 203

梅影三叠Collection

Posted: 2007-10-08 16:29:57 Post subject:

有象征意味

黑雨滴
秀才

Joined: 11 Jun 2007
Posts: 144

黑雨滴Collection

Posted: 2007-10-08 19:37:32 Post subject:

喜欢第二首，问好 _________________ 个人主页：http://blog.sina.com.cn/afirewang

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