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思念(三首)
雨中垂钓人
秀才


Joined: 18 Jun 2007
Posts: 109

雨中垂钓人Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-23 06:37:41    Post subject: 思念(三首) Reply with quote

(一)
你在我心中悄悄的蜇伏,
多少年后萌发让我感到痛楚。
可能这就是初衷的恋情,
怎么到今天才有强烈的感触。
无数次确曾在梦中闪现,
仿佛是在黑暗中摇曳的蜡烛。
突然你出现在我的面前,
真实的表白让我心底在抽搐。
(二)
第一次在梦中见到你,
你还是年轻时的模样。
多少次的思念没有你,
总让我在梦中去倘徉。
人海茫茫用心在寻觅,
不知那里是正确方向。
自从分别松开你的手,
常常涌起自责的惆怅。
(三)
你给我留下一个窗口,
让我探视昨天的依旧。
匆匆忙忙走过半个世纪,
才知道友谊可以长留。
几年也许未见过一面,
相逢仍是往日的春秋。
风霜悄然飞上了眼角,
只有朴实的情素不用追求。
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唐伯虎
秀才


Joined: 26 Dec 2006
Posts: 120

唐伯虎Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-23 14:09:40    Post subject: Reply with quote

不错的构思, 少点押韵会更好些
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杨海军
进士出身


Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-23 15:01:12    Post subject: Reply with quote

嗯。表达方式很重要。问好诗人
_________________
走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮
——拙作《离开村庄》
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751
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