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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

蚊子

上城
进士出身

Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 2024
Location: 江夏黄鹤楼
上城Collection

Posted: 2007-07-20 02:13:34 Post subject: 蚊子

蚊子文/占白扔掉折扇关掉电扇熄掉一室之 --空 ---气汗大兵团军鼓乐殇战场之 --空 ---气血蚊香硝烟纷纷 ---跌 --落了留印于竹席留印于方桌留印于木椅一杯水里泡着无数尸体七月五日 _________________ 每个诗人都很重要

阿依琼裙
秀才

Joined: 09 Apr 2007
Posts: 920
Location: 废墟之上
阿依琼裙Collection

Posted: 2007-07-20 02:24:27 Post subject:

呵呵～～蚊子之骚扰哦～～～：）） _________________ 踏过废墟,走来 http://blog.sina.com.cn/m/weiyurong

白水
大学士

Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection

Posted: 2007-07-20 04:07:42 Post subject:

WOW, 如此夏季

上城
进士出身

Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 2024
Location: 江夏黄鹤楼
上城Collection

Posted: 2007-07-20 06:57:08 Post subject:

_________________ 每个诗人都很重要

nobody
进士出身

Joined: 31 Dec 2006
Posts: 2651
Location: Madtown
nobodyCollection

Posted: 2007-07-20 10:44:48 Post subject:

巧，以前也写过一个，题目一模一样。 _________________ I'm nobody! Who are you?

杨海军
进士出身

Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection

Posted: 2007-07-20 13:55:59 Post subject:

不要伤害诗中的蚊子,它们多么美! _________________ 走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮 ——拙作《离开村庄》 http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751

半溪明月
榜眼

Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection

Posted: 2007-07-22 06:39:10 Post subject:

呵呵，我也最怕蚊子,最恐怖的是花脚大蚊子~

金金
进士出身

Joined: 08 Feb 2007
Posts: 2035
Location: 山东济宁
金金Collection

Posted: 2007-07-22 20:58:13 Post subject:

拍死 _________________ http://blog.sina.com.cn/shirenjinjin

博弈
榜眼

Joined: 21 Dec 2006
Posts: 4381
Location: SFO
博弈Collection

Posted: 2007-07-23 10:06:10 Post subject:

有时，失序的文字犹如蚊子，挥之不去，拍之不着，恼煞人也！ _________________ （在不斷的審醜裡終將建立起新的審美）

上城
进士出身

Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 2024
Location: 江夏黄鹤楼
上城Collection

Posted: 2007-07-28 03:51:04 Post subject:

nobody wrote:

巧，以前也写过一个，题目一模一样。

巧乎哉？不巧也。大抵英雄所见略同呵 Smile

_________________
每个诗人都很重要

上城
进士出身

Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 2024
Location: 江夏黄鹤楼
上城Collection

Posted: 2007-07-28 03:57:10 Post subject:

杨海军 wrote:

不要伤害诗中的蚊子,它们多么美!

感谢你对蚊子的关爱。有这份“爱”，他们不枉来过一遭。
_________________
每个诗人都很重要

上城
进士出身

Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 2024
Location: 江夏黄鹤楼
上城Collection

Posted: 2007-07-28 03:58:30 Post subject:

金金 wrote:

拍死

金金也太不厚道了！
_________________
每个诗人都很重要

上城
进士出身

Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 2024
Location: 江夏黄鹤楼
上城Collection

Posted: 2007-07-28 04:00:47 Post subject:

半溪明月 wrote:

呵呵，我也最怕蚊子,最恐怖的是花脚大蚊子~

还谁怕？
_________________
每个诗人都很重要

上城
进士出身

Joined: 15 Mar 2007
Posts: 2024
Location: 江夏黄鹤楼
上城Collection

Posted: 2007-07-28 04:15:50 Post subject:

博弈 wrote:

有时，失序的文字犹如蚊子，挥之不去，拍之不着，恼煞人也！ Laughing

看见别人能把文字一行一字的很羡慕，就学一学。还有第一节：
“扔掉纸扇
关掉电扇
囚于一室
之
空
气”，被改了，现觉得改的不好。夏天天气热，
晤于一室，凉席上到处是汗印。还有夜晚睡觉，
蚊子围着嗡嗡，实在无法，人人唾骂。
此诗集合了多方面的经验。无奈，自嘲。

“蚊子”可否通假“文字”~~
_________________
每个诗人都很重要

韩少君
进士出身

Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection

Posted: 2007-07-28 06:18:38 Post subject:

通假是有讲究的．一般约定俗成． _________________ 靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345

金金
进士出身

Joined: 08 Feb 2007
Posts: 2035
Location: 山东济宁
金金Collection

Posted: 2007-07-29 02:37:56 Post subject:

我是替你拍蚊子 _________________ http://blog.sina.com.cn/shirenjinjin

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

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