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门前的一棵树 朋友们批!
谷风
童生


Joined: 29 May 2007
Posts: 16

谷风Collection
PostPosted: 2007-06-26 06:57:57    Post subject: 门前的一棵树 朋友们批! Reply with quote

[门前的一棵树]

这棵树像极了我的幸福
风吹过来
我看见叶子背面的温暖
铺就一地花荫
而树上的那只鸟是谁
我拾起滴落的啁啾 糖一样
含在嘴里溢出天空的蓝

这个时候 我会流出眼泪
望着六月
把身子移到一个远处
像那些伸长的枝柯一样


[潮湿的午后]

叶子的眼睛在看什么
这个午后都潮湿了
我看见先前的声音水气一样
而我还得走过

在这个满满的午后
我怀疑我走在一块礁石的内部
我触及到很多的手指
并被支解
我发现我丢了
灰色的云又压下来


[一滴水]

一滴水通体透亮
它落下来
受到无情地分解
它喊了一声 走远

它的背影似乎天空的笔头
在写一个陌生的文字
然后交给泥土

很多时候 我仍坚持在一滴水里
却喊不出声来


[蚯蚓]

我的路在泥土里
我吃着黑暗
为了翻找生命的秘密
我行走在潮湿里 被遗忘

鲜红的血就是一盏灯
照见了自己的弯曲
而我还要歌唱
唱出千年的桃花流水
唱出一座山还在疯长
唱出了大地上的影子愈来愈密


[风从叶子上走下来]

风从叶子上走下来
是一只泥水的手
它抚摸了我的眉林和胸前的纽扣
又犹豫地滑下来 绕过我的手指

此时 风继续从那么多叶子上走下来
它看见了赤裸的夜晚


[我弯腰拾一块石子]

我弯腰拾一块石子
没有在乎那片旷野
我在一朵花影里拾一块石子
其实是一块天空的碎片
它身上有一处斑纹
像抱住的一片云

现在 这块石子就在我手上
此时 风急驰而过
像挟阳光的马匹
此时 我在一种嘶鸣里正抓着石子
别人说 我多像一座桥梁
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半溪明月
榜眼


Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection
PostPosted: 2007-06-26 07:54:11    Post subject: Reply with quote

厚实的一组,娴熟的写法,欣赏并学习!问好谷风老师! Very Happy
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温柔一刀
童生


Joined: 26 Jun 2007
Posts: 5

温柔一刀Collection
PostPosted: 2007-06-26 17:08:23    Post subject: Reply with quote

欣赏~
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木易沉香
秀才


Joined: 17 Jun 2007
Posts: 122
Location: 中国河南
木易沉香Collection
PostPosted: 2007-06-27 01:12:26    Post subject: Reply with quote

这个时候 我会流出眼泪
望着六月
把身子移到一个远处
像那些伸长的枝柯一样

意象开阔 意境深远 再次欣赏Smile
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晓雾
童生


Joined: 29 May 2007
Posts: 21

晓雾Collection
PostPosted: 2007-06-27 06:47:48    Post subject: Reply with quote

直接切入,直抵内核.内蕴,耐咀嚼.真正抓住了诗质.好诗歌,提!
_________________
晓雾博客 欢迎光临!
http://blog.sina.com.cn/blogxiaowu
http://blog.163.com/yeah_116
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谷风
童生


Joined: 29 May 2007
Posts: 16

谷风Collection
PostPosted: 2007-06-28 20:33:50    Post subject: Reply with quote

问好各位!
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kokho
进士出身


Joined: 30 Nov 2006
Posts: 2642
Location: Singapore
kokhoCollection
PostPosted: 2007-06-29 10:25:23    Post subject: Reply with quote

还是 没法突破朗诵诗 的你呀 我呀。。。

大概是 50年不变诗风 ;))

多来 坐坐

Cool Laughing
_________________
乒乓、摄影、诗歌
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晓雾
童生


Joined: 29 May 2007
Posts: 21

晓雾Collection
PostPosted: 2007-07-03 17:15:17    Post subject: Reply with quote

再来欣赏,学习!
_________________
晓雾博客 欢迎光临!
http://blog.sina.com.cn/blogxiaowu
http://blog.163.com/yeah_116
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