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杨海军
进士出身


Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection
PostPosted: 2007-06-08 01:07:45    Post subject: Reply with quote
ZY wrote:
奇异的跳跃,有荒谬剧的感觉.其实,除去惊奇,也可以从深沉的角度去读.

一个小小的建议,第一人称的两句话:"令我啼笑皆非的是 "和"小伊，你是不是疯了．．．．．．",或许并不需要说出来.也就是说,由读者去反应.浅见了,包涵.

问好.


嗯，是得考虑一下。谢兄台提出宝贵建议！！祝 好！！
_________________
走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮
——拙作《离开村庄》
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751
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杨海军
进士出身


Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection
PostPosted: 2007-06-08 01:09:27    Post subject: Reply with quote
白水 Moonlight wrote:
真情为诗


谢白水兄的赏读，很是感激！望常交流。祝兄愉快！！
_________________
走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮
——拙作《离开村庄》
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751
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周平庸
童生


Joined: 08 Jun 2007
Posts: 10

周平庸Collection
PostPosted: 2007-06-08 20:15:11    Post subject: Reply with quote
这个好
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黑牙
童生


Joined: 03 Jun 2007
Posts: 54

黑牙Collection
PostPosted: 2007-06-09 06:05:49    Post subject: Reply with quote
小伊，你是不是疯了．．．．．．

我觉得这完全可能`````
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有一个位置，我从来都没有找到。
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杨海军
进士出身


Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection
PostPosted: 2007-06-11 17:24:30    Post subject: Reply with quote
周平庸 wrote:
这个好


谢青民诗人！！
_________________
走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮
——拙作《离开村庄》
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751
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杨海军
进士出身


Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection
PostPosted: 2007-06-11 17:25:23    Post subject: Reply with quote
黑牙 wrote:
小伊，你是不是疯了．．．．．．

我觉得这完全可能`````


谢黑牙诗人赏读，多交流！！
_________________
走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮
——拙作《离开村庄》
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751
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黑雨滴
秀才


Joined: 11 Jun 2007
Posts: 144

黑雨滴Collection
PostPosted: 2007-06-12 00:28:37    Post subject: Reply with quote
向小伊问好，向诗人也问好啦
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个人主页：http://blog.sina.com.cn/afirewang
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