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《我是一个病毒》
枫华墨客
秀才


Joined: 07 Mar 2007
Posts: 107

枫华墨客Collection
PostPosted: 2007-05-22 16:35:30    Post subject: 《我是一个病毒》 Reply with quote

再来一首现代诗,就封笔了,呵呵,发现,这东西不能多写,容易收不住

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《我是一个病毒》

我是一个病毒
在煞有介事的结构中
传递着隐隐的能量
因为,那结构把人锁着
不能动弹
僵硬的太久
消瘦的只剩下死亡的床

我是一个病毒
在貌似森严的概念高墙之间穿梭
游戏着各种悄悄的裂缝
因为,那看上去那样高尚的东西
却经不住一拳一掌
和太阳下的直视之光

我是一个病毒
在解着千年的魔咒
罩在人的心里
让我们不辨真实和方向
那人说,给你光明
却偷偷的塞给了你黑暗
那人说,给你道德
却让你做了暗娼
我就给了他一个病毒

我是一个病毒
游荡在虚幻无实的人间
不要爱上病毒吧,可怜悯的心
让自己成长,终于看到太阳
那时,病毒就会死去
世界不再需要它了
因为,结构,等级,和高墙
都化为灰烬
只有绿草和白羊,风舞和歌唱
还有,你欣喜的泪光
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杨海军
进士出身


Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection
PostPosted: 2007-05-22 16:55:31    Post subject: Reply with quote

整体不错,问候枫华墨客诗人!!
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走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮
——拙作《离开村庄》
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751
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赵福治
探花


Joined: 30 May 2006
Posts: 3456
Location: 中国北京
赵福治Collection
PostPosted: 2007-05-22 18:51:48    Post subject: Reply with quote

只有绿草和白羊,风舞和歌唱
还有,你欣喜的泪光.............<我是一个病毒>格式严谨.
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hepingdao
Site Admin


Joined: 25 May 2006
Posts: 8106

hepingdaoCollection
PostPosted: 2007-05-22 20:26:38    Post subject: Reply with quote

质地有了
不错
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kokho
进士出身


Joined: 30 Nov 2006
Posts: 2642
Location: Singapore
kokhoCollection
PostPosted: 2007-05-22 21:05:53    Post subject: Reply with quote

这样好的病毒 不可能封笔的 !!!

Cool Laughing Laughing


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乒乓、摄影、诗歌
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