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贝多芬《命运交响曲》第一乐章
kli
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Joined: 30 Mar 2007
Posts: 193
Location: LONDON
kliCollection
PostPosted: 2007-04-26 11:52:15    Post subject: 贝多芬《命运交响曲》第一乐章 Reply with quote

贝多芬《命运交响曲》第一乐章

一道闪电划破四方
天雷轰轰
地火熊熊
决战的时刻涛涛来临

一群野马在镜中
巨烈碰撞要
驰破冲出
一队非洲蛮牛让大地
熊烟滚滚
绿洲在何方

所有的星星颤抖着拒绝
不属于自己的光亮
我紧紧地 紧紧地
咬啮着舌尖 宁愿断也不发出
不属我的呐喊

杀、杀、杀
我要把你攫进我的世界 扼住
你的咽喉 然后
粉碎你
我胜利的狂笑将把你的灰烬
撒向四方

我前进
前进
前进
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hepingdao
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Joined: 25 May 2006
Posts: 8106

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PostPosted: 2007-04-26 12:30:35    Post subject: Reply with quote

有力量

我胜利的狂笑将把你的灰烬
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戴玨
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Joined: 03 Jan 2007
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PostPosted: 2007-04-27 09:32:45    Post subject: Reply with quote

第一節很形象,聽著序奏那些樂音確實可以聯想起閃電,雷聲或烈火。後面難說,畢竟音樂的邏輯和詩歌有所不同。
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我的專欄
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韩少君
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Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
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PostPosted: 2007-04-27 13:01:07    Post subject: Reply with quote

我胜利的狂笑将把你的灰烬
撒向四方

到此结尾更好。商榷!
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靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345
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韩少君
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PostPosted: 2007-04-27 13:01:26    Post subject: Reply with quote

我胜利的狂笑将把你的灰烬
撒向四方

到此结尾更好。商榷!
_________________
靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345
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韩少君
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PostPosted: 2007-04-27 13:20:28    Post subject: Reply with quote

我浏览了你的博客,丰富多采。喜欢《清洁工》:我清扫人类欲望的残渣。很好。
还有:我是清洁工
我并不清洁自己

但本诗到此结尾最好,后边不要。发上来!
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靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345
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金金
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Joined: 08 Feb 2007
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PostPosted: 2007-04-29 20:14:56    Post subject: Reply with quote

继续`!!!!!
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