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Maple Review Home -> 古韵新音

蝶恋花

千橡诚
童生

Joined: 12 May 2013
Posts: 9
Location: 美国
千橡诚Collection

Posted: 2013-05-12 12:34:32 Post subject: 蝶恋花

唯爱莲花无富贵玉立亭亭含笑迷人醉为妇持家生子对她香厨艺明贤惠. 同浪天涯途漫漫心有灵犀相映合光灿今世情缘牢系绊鸳鸯永作春来盼

桃园郎
童生

Joined: 06 Mar 2013
Posts: 53
Location: 中国四川省大英县
桃园郎Collection

Posted: 2013-05-12 21:28:53 Post subject:

蝶恋花是仄声韵，一韵到底的。朋友的作品上阕是“ui”韵脚，下阕却是“an”韵脚。上下不一致。 _________________ 诗词艺苑欢迎你！百度“诗词艺苑”即可找到网址。

千橡诚
童生

Joined: 12 May 2013
Posts: 9
Location: 美国
千橡诚Collection

Posted: 2013-05-13 13:35:13 Post subject: 蝶恋花

多谢指点，已修改。

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Maple Review Home -> 古韵新音

Once you post your works here, that means you submits them to the magazine of Maple Review (North American Maple, or BeiMeiFeng), a bilingual journal published by Chinese Literature Society of North America. The magazine holds the right to translate them into Chinese, and publish them in both languages. You need to be responsible for the copyright issues of your own files uploaded.
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