Maple Review :: View topic - 一只唯美的苹果

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

一只唯美的苹果

岷江一苇
童生

Joined: 02 Feb 2013
Posts: 87
Location: 中国四川犍为
岷江一苇Collection

Posted: 2013-04-22 13:59:47 Post subject: 一只唯美的苹果

一只青苹果端放于桌前等待主人的独吞或与客人分享是怎样的一只手摘断了苹果青春的成长想起上中学时的初恋女友有一次神秘兮兮地问我要不要嗅嗅她青青的苹果我回答说又不能吃嗅有何用她笑着戳了一下我的头 “梦去吧！等有一天它熟了就会砸到你的头上”

山城子
榜眼

Joined: 23 May 2007
Posts: 4771
Location: 中国贵州
山城子Collection

Posted: 2013-04-22 15:47:18 Post subject:

前面铺垫还可以节约一些。 _________________ 诗是人生的雅伴儿。

岷江一苇
童生

Joined: 02 Feb 2013
Posts: 87
Location: 中国四川犍为
岷江一苇Collection

Posted: 2013-04-22 16:20:51 Post subject:

谢谢山城老师指点！

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

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