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Maple Review Home -> 古韵新音

醉（新韵）

桃园郎
童生

Joined: 06 Mar 2013
Posts: 53
Location: 中国四川省大英县
桃园郎Collection

Posted: 2013-04-08 20:50:50 Post subject: 醉（新韵）

醉（新韵）桃园郎酒香薰绿柳，忽左还忽右。白发染闲情，牧童何处有？ _________________ 诗词艺苑欢迎你！百度“诗词艺苑”即可找到网址。

黄洋界
探花

Joined: 23 Mar 2007
Posts: 3301
Location: 多伦多,加拿大
黄洋界Collection

Posted: 2013-04-09 00:34:26 Post subject:

只闻酒香，不见牧童，桃园郎聊寄闲愁也！ _________________ ++++++++++++++ 喜金石书画，友竹菊梅兰

qinghongh
榜眼

Joined: 14 Oct 2007
Posts: 4110

qinghonghCollection

Posted: 2013-04-09 05:32:21 Post subject:

酒香已醉人，何须问牧童？

白云闲人
探花

Joined: 26 Aug 2007
Posts: 3466

白云闲人Collection

Posted: 2013-04-09 09:03:20 Post subject:

酒香、柳摇，白发、闲愁。欣赏！ _________________ 诗中岁月, 笛里关山.

桃园郎
童生

Joined: 06 Mar 2013
Posts: 53
Location: 中国四川省大英县
桃园郎Collection

Posted: 2013-04-09 20:50:53 Post subject:

黄洋界 wrote:

只闻酒香，不见牧童，桃园郎聊寄闲愁也！

感谢朋友仔细的评读！

对于诗作中的不足，请多指点，不胜感激！
_________________
诗词艺苑欢迎你！
百度“诗词艺苑”即可找到网址。

桃园郎
童生

Joined: 06 Mar 2013
Posts: 53
Location: 中国四川省大英县
桃园郎Collection

Posted: 2013-04-09 20:52:39 Post subject:

qinghongh wrote:

酒香已醉人，何须问牧童？

古诗中是问牧童寻酒家。我却是醉酒后问牧童在何处。

反其道而行之，不知可否？
_________________
诗词艺苑欢迎你！
百度“诗词艺苑”即可找到网址。

桃园郎
童生

Joined: 06 Mar 2013
Posts: 53
Location: 中国四川省大英县
桃园郎Collection

Posted: 2013-04-09 20:53:50 Post subject: 感谢朋友

白云闲人 wrote:

酒香、柳摇，白发、闲愁。欣赏！

感谢朋友注意审读！请多赐教！
_________________
诗词艺苑欢迎你！
百度“诗词艺苑”即可找到网址。

qinghongh
榜眼

Joined: 14 Oct 2007
Posts: 4110

qinghonghCollection

Posted: 2013-04-10 05:51:15 Post subject:

桃园郎 wrote:

qinghongh wrote:

酒香已醉人，何须问牧童？

古诗中是问牧童寻酒家。我却是醉酒后问牧童在何处。
...

仄韵一首有新意。

桃园郎
童生

Joined: 06 Mar 2013
Posts: 53
Location: 中国四川省大英县
桃园郎Collection

Posted: 2013-04-10 19:56:28 Post subject:

qinghongh wrote:

桃园郎 wrote:

qinghongh wrote:

酒香已醉人，何须问牧童？

古诗中是问牧童寻酒家。我却是醉酒后问牧童在何处。
...

仄韵一首有新意。

感谢了！
_________________
诗词艺苑欢迎你！
百度“诗词艺苑”即可找到网址。

冷雨
秀才

Joined: 05 Nov 2010
Posts: 439

冷雨Collection

Posted: 2013-04-10 22:17:27 Post subject:

问好诗友！前来学习！

桃园郎
童生

Joined: 06 Mar 2013
Posts: 53
Location: 中国四川省大英县
桃园郎Collection

Posted: 2013-04-11 21:06:06 Post subject:

冷雨 wrote:

问好诗友！前来学习！

感谢雅赏！互相学习！
_________________
诗词艺苑欢迎你！
百度“诗词艺苑”即可找到网址。

笑聊
探花

Joined: 05 Jan 2010
Posts: 3448
Location: 中国江苏无锡
笑聊Collection

Posted: 2013-04-12 10:07:40 Post subject:

酒香薰绿柳，忽左还忽右。白发染闲情，牧童何处有？杨柳的或左或右，正是醉眼朦胧景象。牧童何处？看来并非真醉。所谓：醉翁之意不在酒也！

桃园郎
童生

Joined: 06 Mar 2013
Posts: 53
Location: 中国四川省大英县
桃园郎Collection

Posted: 2013-04-14 21:25:45 Post subject:

笑聊 wrote:

酒香薰绿柳，忽左还忽右。
...

感谢版主解读！
_________________
诗词艺苑欢迎你！
百度“诗词艺苑”即可找到网址。

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