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情人节短诗三首
韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2011-02-15 19:14:55    Post subject: 情人节短诗三首 Reply with quote

《芳香的虫子》

玫瑰园
我想求你一件事
把你的玫瑰给我一支
就一支

我要一支现代的
带刺的思想甜蜜的脸庞
个子不必太高但要身材窈窕
叶子必须有多种颜色
像她美丽的时装

如果你不答应我
大风就把你吹散
让她自己跑出来

如果还不答应我
我就变成芳香的虫子
咬破你所有孩子的脸

啊,谢谢
一支,我就要一支
只要一支

《雪》


一是白
二是干净
放在舌尖上还有点甜味

所以都说她
肌肤如雪

包括山雪、乡雪、林雪
梅雪、梨雪、桃雪

冬天:
你不用板着你的脸
我就是要亲亲你的女儿


《也可以》

也可以下一场大雪
让勇敢的人
在秘密门前留下脚印

也可以下一场大雨
让有情人在雨中继续拥抱
不动

也可以刮一场大风
把天堂、地狱
都吹散

也可以什么都没有
开始就干净
结束也干净


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靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2011-02-16 15:32:28    Post subject: Reply with quote

Very Happy 够浪漫
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韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2011-03-12 02:08:51    Post subject: 啊 Reply with quote

啊。忘了回谢!
_________________
靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345
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邓文星
童生


Joined: 13 Mar 2011
Posts: 10
Location: 中国
邓文星Collection
PostPosted: 2011-03-13 07:20:23    Post subject: Reply with quote

前两首的感觉不错,有独到的构思和鲜明的特点,最后一首有点空泛
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杨海军
进士出身


Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection
PostPosted: 2011-03-15 06:16:35    Post subject: Reply with quote

三首至情至理的小诗,让人心动!
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走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮
——拙作《离开村庄》
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751
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低处的迷雾
秀才


Joined: 11 Feb 2007
Posts: 104
Location: 六朝残梦
低处的迷雾Collection
PostPosted: 2011-03-17 14:49:48    Post subject: Reply with quote

也可以什么都没有
开始就干净
结束也干净

很坦然,坦然之内留下些许的回味。问好
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写诗就是灵魂在私奔。那些风中的道路,我一一痛过的伤口,已被跋涉的脚步止住了腥酸。博客:
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1236291191
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