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小哨兵 : 《三 月》
韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-18 03:58:22    Post subject: 小哨兵 : 《三 月》 Reply with quote

三 月


我想把三月锯成两截

一枝拿在手里
向别人显摆
我逮着春汛了

一枝插在泥里
让它继续发芽

不,我不能锯断它
哪怕它柔软得是一根发丝
也要当作承载最重情义的


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靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-18 14:07:34    Post subject: Reply with quote

少君, 别人怎么看我不介意, 个人觉得这首诗歌是我读过的你所有的诗歌里较TOP的一首.
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娇娇
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Joined: 18 Nov 2008
Posts: 124
Location: 吉林四平
娇娇Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-18 14:30:31    Post subject: Reply with quote

白水说的很对!同感!很美!
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每段路都有蹊径,向着阳光延伸!
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娇娇
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Joined: 18 Nov 2008
Posts: 124
Location: 吉林四平
娇娇Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-18 15:21:13    Post subject: Reply with quote

还是你的好!奇思妙想!喜欢!下面我来模仿一下试试,嘿嘿。
三月

我欲把三月掰开

左边放进心里
贴近最柔软的地方
听花开的声音

右边植入眼眸
绣上美丽的晚霞

不,我要让它完整的活
哪怕春光背对着我
也要把它刻入
路途
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每段路都有蹊径,向着阳光延伸!
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刘浪
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Joined: 04 Dec 2008
Posts: 227

刘浪Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-18 17:55:35    Post subject: Reply with quote

您的诗歌不好复制。即便学到形似,绝不可能达到神似。向您学习。问好。
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是金子也会 花 光地
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韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-21 15:58:43    Post subject: xie Reply with quote

谢谢楼上各位评读。问好大家!
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白水
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Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
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PostPosted: 2009-03-21 18:20:17    Post subject: Reply with quote

看来四平四平八稳, 这样大家就放心了. 还担心小震闹得大家要搬到防震棚里住呢 Wink
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韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-21 18:52:31    Post subject: Reply with quote

谢谢白水先生对四平人民的关注和慰问!响声剧烈,震感不大。地面和楼房颤动了一秒。问好!
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靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345
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后现代刀子
童生


Joined: 21 Feb 2009
Posts: 59

后现代刀子Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-21 22:40:49    Post subject: Reply with quote

最后一个桥。
特别触目和挺温馨的哈。
问好韩大哥。
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88年的。
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韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-23 21:28:58    Post subject: Reply with quote

blue moon rose cup of wine
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靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345
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陈若祥
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Joined: 12 Feb 2007
Posts: 470
Location: 中国*安徽
陈若祥Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-24 01:05:31    Post subject: Reply with quote

意象的选择很巧,
有个性的景反映三月的共性.
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¤当树的叶子再次泛绿,繁华
¤我们欣赏着一部与你我无关的电影
¤看着春天悄悄地走来
¤看着春天延伸在我们的脚下
◆安徽凤鸣诗社◆http://blog.sina.com.cn/fmshishe
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莞君
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Joined: 20 Oct 2007
Posts: 561
Location: 中国 陕西
莞君Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-24 21:46:05    Post subject: Reply with quote

构思独特 语言空间大 耐人回味 问好老师
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莞君
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姜慕水
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Joined: 20 Jan 2009
Posts: 104

姜慕水Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-25 02:09:57    Post subject: Reply with quote

精短之作,耐人回味.问好少君兄!知道四平没事,才为海军兄和你放心.
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天风神威
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Joined: 25 Mar 2009
Posts: 194

天风神威Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-25 04:47:33    Post subject: Reply with quote

喜欢这样的诗歌.
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安红红
同进士出身


Joined: 07 Feb 2009
Posts: 1808

安红红Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-25 21:12:08    Post subject: Reply with quote

喜欢~

问好~学习~
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微信:qisebaihuayuan
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韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-26 00:17:20    Post subject: Reply with quote

hot boy ice cream
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天风神威
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Joined: 25 Mar 2009
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PostPosted: 2009-03-27 01:44:13    Post subject: Reply with quote

三月,值得心情遨游的季节。
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荷梦
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Joined: 19 Dec 2006
Posts: 2826
Location: 湖北,黄梅
荷梦Collection
PostPosted: 2009-03-28 03:21:42    Post subject: Reply with quote

起笔就很抓人,读后更是叫绝!
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