Maple Review :: View topic - 我的话越来越少了

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

我的话越来越少了

陶杰
童生

Joined: 24 Feb 2007
Posts: 96

陶杰Collection

Posted: 2009-02-19 01:28:36 Post subject: 我的话越来越少了

我的话越来越少了十二岁时我一口就能说出各种水果的名字现在我得先扒开层层覆盖的枝叶抓住它们飞来飞去的根我把一个词含在嘴里让它在不见天日的黑暗中悄悄化掉。偶尔它也会像苹果那样，甜起来 2009-2-19

沙漠
秀才

Joined: 26 Jan 2007
Posts: 977
Location: 中国温州
沙漠Collection

Posted: 2009-02-19 01:31:33 Post subject:

第一节不要是不是更好？挺有味道！ _________________ 个人博客http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1056295180

陶杰
童生

Joined: 24 Feb 2007
Posts: 96

陶杰Collection

Posted: 2009-02-19 21:51:18 Post subject:

沙漠兄好意见!改了.

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

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