秋天已經開始擁擠 鐮刀提着風
而我一直站在山坡 守着鳥鳴 蝶翅
守着葉子消瘦 守着一枚果子
墜落或者成熟
我要悄悄把黃昏領走 馬車裝來星星的夢
可是 我的泥土親戚 高粱兄弟
活在你們中間我是有福的人
我恨我不是一滴雨 一陣風
可以直接走進內心 衹能像一棵草
舉着露珠 不至於在夜晚走失
as sickles carry wind in hands
I, however, keep standing on the hillside
watching birds singing, butterflies fluttering
trees thinning, and a fruit
ripen or fall. I’ll take away the dusk quietly
and load the carriage with dreams of stars
My relatives of the earth and Kaoliang(*) brothers
Although I'm blessed as living among you
I mourn not to be a drop of rain, or a breath of wind
that can walk into your heart directly
only a grass holding dew beads
to prevent myself getting lost in the night
* Kaoliang, a kind of crop that is widely grown in North China.
而我一直站在山坡 守着鳥鳴 蝶翅
守着葉子消瘦 守着一枚果子
墜落或者成熟
我要悄悄把黃昏領走 馬車裝來星星的夢
可是 我的泥土親戚 高粱兄弟
活在你們中間我是有福的人
我恨我不是一滴雨 一陣風
可以直接走進內心 衹能像一棵草
舉着露珠 不至於在夜晚走失
as sickles carry wind in hands
I, however, keep standing on the hillside
watching birds singing, butterflies fluttering
trees thinning, and a fruit
ripen or fall. I’ll take away the dusk quietly
and load the carriage with dreams of stars
My relatives of the earth and Kaoliang(*) brothers
Although I'm blessed as living among you
I mourn not to be a drop of rain, or a breath of wind
that can walk into your heart directly
only a grass holding dew beads
to prevent myself getting lost in the night
* Kaoliang, a kind of crop that is widely grown in North China.
【賞析】 一枚果子的“墜落或者成熟”，活着就是這麽簡單！詩易懂，意義也平凡，但能在平凡中將詩體現出來，即相當難得。（陳銘華）
樸實如泥土的語言，卻不乏新意，如"鐮刀提着風"便勁道十足（“提着風”在這裏該是指蓄勢待發準備收割吧？)。在忙碌的收穫季節裏，詩中一個孤獨卻執着地活着的人，呼之欲出。（非馬）
一種對季節無常的焦慮，有心護衛卻又無能為力的驚心。最後一段寫出即使卑微如一棵草，也要維護一粒露珠存在的盡力。（嚮明）