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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

诗三首

朱枫
童生

Joined: 13 Jan 2008
Posts: 16

朱枫Collection

Posted: 2008-01-13 23:39:11 Post subject: 诗三首

《传承》生命中出生，死亡中留存祖先流动在细胞一棵树里长着多少棵千年大树一只雄鹰飞着多少百年前的高度道德经里，多少人见到了老子的青牛一个游子在夜色中行走,穿父亲的鞋子,寻梦《怯》走过冬天，我是不是还能扶住春天的细腰我的手已冻成枯木，血脉里有了硬化的木质头发里落满失望的灰尘和摔碎的鸟语我的嗓子严重老化，唱不出动听的歌儿冬天的长路，滑的冰雪跌伤了我的腿而我还必须要走向春天呀春天的高岭上，有我的期望我还要远远的看一看桃花的怒放我还要走近一株老了的榆树说，我们都老了，而我们必竟还活在春天《秘密》你告诉我深藏的秘密告诉我你深山中的冷我引你打开这冬天的山洞在最深处我摸出了春天告诉你这是我们两人找到的你给了我春天的钥匙

白水
大学士

Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection

Posted: 2008-01-14 01:15:47 Post subject:

文笔自如, 内涵也不错

迪拜
同进士出身

Joined: 31 Oct 2006
Posts: 1588

迪拜Collection

Posted: 2008-01-15 17:57:55 Post subject:

都很好

朱枫
童生

Joined: 13 Jan 2008
Posts: 16

朱枫Collection

Posted: 2008-01-15 22:37:00 Post subject:

白水 Moonlight wrote:

文笔自如, 内涵也不错

朱枫
童生

Joined: 13 Jan 2008
Posts: 16

朱枫Collection

Posted: 2008-01-15 22:37:53 Post subject:

朱枫 wrote:

白水 Moonlight wrote:

文笔自如, 内涵也不错

谢朋友！

朱枫
童生

Joined: 13 Jan 2008
Posts: 16

朱枫Collection

Posted: 2008-01-15 22:38:46 Post subject:

迪拜 wrote:

都很好

谢谢了！新年快乐！

赵福治
探花

Joined: 30 May 2006
Posts: 3456
Location: 中国北京
赵福治Collection

Posted: 2008-01-16 23:13:39 Post subject:

一个游子在夜色中行走,穿父亲的鞋子,寻梦 .....有蕴涵和回味的作品,问好兄.

朱枫
童生

Joined: 13 Jan 2008
Posts: 16

朱枫Collection

Posted: 2008-01-20 08:03:13 Post subject: 回复

赵福治 wrote:

一个游子在夜色中
...

握手！

半溪明月
榜眼

Joined: 30 Sep 2006
Posts: 4760

半溪明月Collection

Posted: 2008-01-21 22:14:45 Post subject:

道德经里，多少人见到了老子的青牛更喜欢第一首些~

单菲
童生

Joined: 06 Dec 2007
Posts: 17

单菲Collection

Posted: 2008-01-22 06:49:37 Post subject:

走过冬天，我是不是还能扶住春天的细腰我的手已冻成枯木，血脉里有了硬化的木质头发里落满失望的灰尘和摔碎的鸟语我的嗓子严重老化，唱不出动听的歌儿冬天的长路，滑的冰雪跌伤了我的腿而我还必须要走向春天呀春天的高岭上，有我的期望我还要远远的看一看桃花的怒放我还要走近一株老了的榆树说，我们都老了，而我们必竟还活在春天感情十分饱满，成功地刻画了内心的波澜，握手！

嘉慕思
童生

Joined: 12 Jan 2008
Posts: 78
Location: 佳木斯
嘉慕思Collection

Posted: 2008-01-23 21:37:40 Post subject:

走过冬天，我是不是还能扶住春天的细腰《秘密》你告诉我深藏的秘密告诉我你深山中的冷我引你打开这冬天的山洞在最深处我摸出了春天告诉你这是我们两人找到的你给了我春天的钥匙喜欢,欣赏.学习. _________________ 我为自己唱挽歌---文学是个人的选择,不是集体的强加

朱枫
童生

Joined: 13 Jan 2008
Posts: 16

朱枫Collection

Posted: 2008-01-25 09:17:11 Post subject:

单菲 wrote:

走过冬天，我是不是还能扶住春天的细腰
...

问好!

朱枫
童生

Joined: 13 Jan 2008
Posts: 16

朱枫Collection

Posted: 2008-01-25 09:17:41 Post subject:

半溪明月 wrote:

道德经里，多少人
见到了老子的青牛

更喜欢第一首些~

感谢!

朱枫
童生

Joined: 13 Jan 2008
Posts: 16

朱枫Collection

Posted: 2008-01-25 09:18:09 Post subject:

嘉慕思 wrote:

走过冬天，我是不是还能扶住春天的细腰
...

问好.多批评!

赵福治
探花

Joined: 30 May 2006
Posts: 3456
Location: 中国北京
赵福治Collection

Posted: 2008-01-27 15:53:24 Post subject:

秘密》你告诉我深藏的秘密告诉我你深山中的冷我引你打开这冬天的山洞在最深处我摸出了春天告诉你这是我们两人找到的你给了我春天的钥匙..................再读.

朱枫
童生

Joined: 13 Jan 2008
Posts: 16

朱枫Collection

Posted: 2008-01-28 21:30:48 Post subject:

赵福治 wrote:

秘密》
...

远握!

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

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