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<<厂旁边的三岔路口>>
子花
秀才


Joined: 08 Mar 2007
Posts: 722

子花Collection
PostPosted: 2007-08-28 22:41:39    Post subject: <<厂旁边的三岔路口>> Reply with quote

<<厂旁边的三岔路口>>

<一>
一位妇女,怀里兜着个婴儿,跪坐在路边
烧纸

没有哭,只是目光有点呆滞
不看灰烬被卷进车轮

孩子哭了,可能是因为天黑得太快
风沙吹进了眼睛

妇女没有动,连眼皮也没动
只看着火和灰

<二>
我刚发工资,600块
今天请了半天假,给我妈买几件衣服

给我爸也买几件
省得我妈每晚都要给他缝缝补补

600块应该够

<三>
其实,我不该有600块
300就够了

<四>
我从兜里抠出300
递给她
捏着一张黄纸的右手停在了半空,十秒
她抬起眼皮,目光突然颤抖

她低下头,把我的手推了回来
我想放下就走
一阵风,把它们吹向了天空
她两眼望着它们消失的踪迹
泪水滚滚地冒出来

<五>
孩子哭了,咿咿呀呀地看着我
叫我爸爸

我羞红了脸
斜视四周,既没有一个围观的人
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迪拜
同进士出身


Joined: 31 Oct 2006
Posts: 1588

迪拜Collection
PostPosted: 2007-08-28 23:19:14    Post subject: Reply with quote

有现实意义
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kokho
进士出身


Joined: 30 Nov 2006
Posts: 2642
Location: Singapore
kokhoCollection
PostPosted: 2007-08-29 12:41:00    Post subject: Reply with quote

很有生活的味道 :)

。。
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乒乓、摄影、诗歌
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子花
秀才


Joined: 08 Mar 2007
Posts: 722

子花Collection
PostPosted: 2007-08-30 17:57:08    Post subject: Reply with quote

很感谢两位诗人光临,希望更多人能尝到更多的其他的滋味!!~~~~呵呵
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nobody
进士出身


Joined: 31 Dec 2006
Posts: 2651
Location: Madtown
nobodyCollection
PostPosted: 2007-08-30 20:50:30    Post subject: Reply with quote

简练但是丰润。有生活,提炼的也很好,显示了一定功力。
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I'm nobody! Who are you?
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-09-01 07:26:27    Post subject: Reply with quote

诗人情怀, 善良, 敏锐, 感人

问好子花
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