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迷惘1[2]  Next
白水
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PostPosted: 2007-05-26 15:53:53    Post subject: 迷惘 Reply with quote

迷惘

当敏感的指尖
淡漠了触摸键盘的欲望
那已不是诗歌的苍白

我们把风花雪月冠以漂亮的虚词
我们把灵魂, 爱情, 草莓和咸鱼
炖成热辣辣的火锅
我们把玫瑰, 骨骼, 幛螂甚至
羞于启齿的人体最隐密的部位都
标注了美妙的平平仄仄

某个周末的早晨
你从睡梦中平静的醒来
突然发现没有了思念
没有了愤怒
没有了激情
也没有了自己都不明白为谁而生的
莫名的痛

手上的笔是那么多余
你咧了咧嘴, 就算是微笑吧
你对自己淡淡的说
别了, 我的最爱, 我
的诗歌

是因为承受了太多的刺激而趋于麻木
还是彼此的诗行, 不, 应该是脑浆
无数次的复制

那天寂静的黄昏
你突然发现相拥的女友是他人的娇妻
对面的陌生人抱着自己的孩子
镜子里飘逸的沙裙
是三年前别人遗弃的旧衣裳

你笑了, 原来, 自己不过是魔方中的一条肋骨
(对, 是魔方, 一个从别人诗歌中剽窃来的我所钟爱的名词)
一次次把玩, 打乱, 复原, 再打乱, 再复原
淡淡的苦味弥漫开来

我起身, 冲了一杯苦的不能再苦的咖啡
(那是我最厌恶的饮料)
给自己一个更强的刺激

这能算是告别诗歌的结束语吗?
老师会说什么?
或许, 他会说
“不懂诗的真谛
凭什么写毕业论文?”

那么, 谁能告诉我诗歌的真谛
是什么? 在哪里?

我仅仅是一滴水
今天的温度虽然不算太高
但我仍然抵御不了流动的风

轻, 再轻
我找不到自己
轻成一缕失魂的雾
飘散在喧嚣的红尘中
那里的人, 更青睐实实在在的灯红酒绿
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溪语
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Joined: 16 Mar 2007
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PostPosted: 2007-05-26 16:03:42    Post subject: Reply with quote

诗人困惑了?!
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他乡客
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Joined: 03 Jan 2007
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PostPosted: 2007-05-26 16:28:17    Post subject: Reply with quote

你突然发现相拥的女友是他人的娇妻
对面的陌生人抱着自己的孩子
镜子里飘逸的沙裙
是三年前别人遗弃的旧衣裳

有点比加索的味道. 把一切打散了重新排局. 前几天还和一位高手胡侃,我说我大胆预测,如同比加索把平面画的要素打乱,按某种立体设想重新布局;后现代派(或称 "新新族派")的诗也会把线性的诗文打乱,以平面,甚至立体设想而出现. 白水这首<迷惘> 是这种设想的一种体现. 赞一个.
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韩少君
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Joined: 06 Apr 2007
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PostPosted: 2007-05-26 16:37:25    Post subject: Reply with quote

拜读。感到生存的压迫和无奈。

物质替代不了精神,但也只有强大的物质可供依靠!问好诗人: rose rose rose rose rose rose
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沙漠
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PostPosted: 2007-05-26 17:08:05    Post subject: Reply with quote

一种强烈的情绪,有克制地流动。
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hepingdao
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PostPosted: 2007-05-26 17:12:51    Post subject: Reply with quote

思考是必要的
冲出自我思维的茧,需要一种勇气
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半溪明月
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PostPosted: 2007-05-26 18:29:25    Post subject: Reply with quote

写出了我的感觉哈,~问好白水!收藏了你的黄沙夜曲,图文并茂,很喜欢~
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白水
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Joined: 02 Oct 2006
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PostPosted: 2007-05-27 06:57:36    Post subject: Reply with quote

谢谢各位朋友, 这是诗歌引发的一些思索吧. 两年前写的. 昨天翻出来, 突然发现思维竟在不断的清理中罗旋循环 Embarassed
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沈漓
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Joined: 26 May 2007
Posts: 16

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PostPosted: 2007-05-27 18:15:50    Post subject: Reply with quote

人类共同的迷惘。诗歌还要提纯,如同毒品,如果提纯到极至,“毒倒”一大片人,诗就是名著,就值钱了。呵呵!
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品玉
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PostPosted: 2007-05-27 21:04:45    Post subject: Reply with quote

你笑了, 原来, 自己不过是魔方中的一条肋骨

......

拜读!
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博弈
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PostPosted: 2007-05-27 21:12:10    Post subject: Reply with quote

沈漓 wrote:
人类共同的迷惘。诗歌还要提纯,如同毒品,如果提纯到极至,“毒倒”一大片人,诗就是名著,就值钱了。呵呵!


诗歌毒品说,嗯,醉人醒人,有意思。
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金金
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PostPosted: 2007-05-27 22:35:37    Post subject: Reply with quote

一个字——苦
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野航
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PostPosted: 2007-05-28 15:51:48    Post subject: Reply with quote

为诗所苦恼也是一种幸福,怕的就是从心底里厌诗----有时候我会产生这种可怕的感觉。
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白水
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PostPosted: 2007-05-29 18:41:54    Post subject: Reply with quote

谢谢各位朋友, 你们的回帖藏着学问, 令人回味. Very Happy
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上城
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PostPosted: 2007-05-30 05:48:21    Post subject: Reply with quote

先别追寻诗歌的真谛。还是写毕业论文重要
这几天我正为此事烦恼,白水兄怎么知道我的事情?
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每个诗人都很重要
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白水
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PostPosted: 2007-05-30 07:05:58    Post subject: Reply with quote

伤城 wrote:
先别追寻诗歌的真谛。还是写毕业论文重要
这几天我正为此事烦恼,白水兄怎么知道我的事情?


或许每个人都有过一些迷惘吧......
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荷梦
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PostPosted: 2007-05-31 03:51:06    Post subject: Reply with quote

迷茫的原来不是我一个!哎~能激起共鸣的诗。
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白水
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Joined: 02 Oct 2006
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PostPosted: 2007-06-03 19:58:57    Post subject: Reply with quote

荷梦 wrote:
迷茫的原来不是我一个!哎~能激起共鸣的诗。


问好梦荷, 但愿我们尽快从这迷惘中走出来
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杨海军
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PostPosted: 2007-06-04 04:24:00    Post subject: Reply with quote

当敏感的指尖
淡漠了触摸键盘的欲望
那已不是诗歌的苍白

我们把风花雪月冠以漂亮的虚词
我们把灵魂, 爱情, 草莓和咸鱼
炖成热辣辣的火锅
我们把玫瑰, 骨骼, 幛螂甚至
羞于启齿的人体最隐密的部位都
标注了美妙的平平仄仄

好!问候白水兄!
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——拙作《离开村庄》
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白水
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Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
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PostPosted: 2007-06-07 20:14:59    Post subject: Reply with quote

杨海军 wrote:
当敏感的指尖
淡漠了触摸键盘的欲望
那已不是诗歌的苍白

我们把风花雪月冠以漂亮的虚词
我们把灵魂, 爱情, 草莓和咸鱼
炖成热辣辣的火锅
我们把玫瑰, 骨骼, 幛螂甚至
羞于启齿的人体最隐密的部位都
标注了美妙的平平仄仄

好!问候白水兄!


问好, 朋友
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