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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

井及其他--浅和雪砚兄"一枚红印及其他 "

ZY
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Joined: 20 Feb 2007
Posts: 163
Location: 台北
ZYCollection

Posted: 2007-05-28 14:26:04 Post subject: 井及其他--浅和雪砚兄"一枚红印及其他 "

她把日子都嚼在蛀牙躯体上留下的目光，霉了以后结痂一瓮酒在屋角发酵满地走出去的脚印都没回头河风里灌满了吹散的发对岸看得见成群野狗向着流水咆哮他们昂首张口、咬著晚空传过来月光的沉默一条老街一路各扫门前的铺子一到黄昏都是闷著头回家的路人枯枝上就是些窒息了的夏一圈一圈捆在井绳里的夏那年出门的一个人影像口乾井那样占著一些水的心思一个没投井的女人走进庙口的天井跟那些买卖著的口舌不打招呼 5/28/2007 _________________ 陌生人遺落的足印們已經靜坐良久

桔子
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Joined: 15 May 2007
Posts: 214

桔子Collection

Posted: 2007-05-28 14:50:44 Post subject:

一圈一圈捆在井绳里的夏那年出门的一个人影像口乾井那样占著一些水的心思好！～

博弈
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Joined: 21 Dec 2006
Posts: 4381
Location: SFO
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Posted: 2007-05-29 01:12:21 Post subject:

桔子 wrote:

一圈一圈捆在井绳里的夏
那年出门的一个人影像口乾井那样占著一些水的心思
好！～

跟着，好！

这一首，黑格尔美学的"美是理念的感性显现", 及“物化”精神很好的展示。
个人觉得咱们这几首，还是雪砚的那一首好。
_________________
（在不斷的審醜裡終將建立起新的審美）

韩少君
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Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection

Posted: 2007-05-29 02:12:19 Post subject:

一个没投井的女人走进庙口的天井跟那些买卖著的口舌不打招呼好处再此也！玄妙多多！ _________________ 靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345

韩少君
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Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection

Posted: 2007-05-29 02:12:51 Post subject:

一个没投井的女人走进庙口的天井跟那些买卖著的口舌不打招呼好处再此也！玄妙多多！ _________________ 靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345

ZY
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Joined: 20 Feb 2007
Posts: 163
Location: 台北
ZYCollection

Posted: 2007-05-29 07:57:25 Post subject:

博弈 wrote:

桔子 wrote:

一圈一圈捆在井绳里的夏
那年出门的一个人影像口乾井那样占著一些水的心思
好！～

跟着，好！

这一首，黑格尔美学的"美是理念的感性显现", 及“物化”精神很好的展示。
个人觉得咱们这几首，还是雪砚的那一首好。

同意，我的和诗，不如原诗精简。
精简，我常觉得，时涵蕴的开始。
_________________
陌生人遺落的足印們已經靜坐良久

ZY
秀才

Joined: 20 Feb 2007
Posts: 163
Location: 台北
ZYCollection

Posted: 2007-05-29 07:58:25 Post subject:

桔子 wrote:

一圈一圈捆在井绳里的夏
那年出门的一个人影像口乾井那样占著一些水的心思
好！～

多谢了。问好。
_________________
陌生人遺落的足印們已經靜坐良久

ZY
秀才

Joined: 20 Feb 2007
Posts: 163
Location: 台北
ZYCollection

Posted: 2007-05-29 08:00:17 Post subject:

韩少君 wrote:

一个没投井的女人走进庙口的天井
跟那些买卖著的口舌不打招呼

好处再此也！玄妙多多！

也只是平常的事呵。
多谢了。问好。
_________________
陌生人遺落的足印們已經靜坐良久

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