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囚徒
fade
童生


Joined: 09 Mar 2007
Posts: 15

fadeCollection
PostPosted: 2007-05-27 08:36:05    Post subject: 囚徒 Reply with quote

今天我失败了,
你把我关在囚笼里,
身上五花大绑,
脚上戴着沉沉的脚镣。
可是,
绳索缚不住我自由的心,
囚笼禁不住我高贵的灵魂。
你想让我屈服,
可我的头抬得比天上的星斗还高。

于是, 你叫来一帮鹰犬,
对我百般折磨,
把我打得遍体鳞伤。
鹰隼生就一副利爪,
在它眼里,
我是一块白花花的肥肉。
恶狗的尾巴摇得象钟摆,
在它眼里,
我是它向主人效忠的最好的资粮。

哎,在刽子手面前谈何人道。
呻吟着,呻吟着,
在这绝望的深渊里,呻吟着。
痛苦啊,痛苦,
在这地狱的隧道里,
何时才是一个尽头?

你得意了,
肉体岂能抵挡暴力的皮鞭。
瞧,我多么仁慈,
在这地狱的高墙上给你开一扇窗,
透过窗,你可以拥有阳光的滋润,
春天的雨露。

收起你那套吧,
我岂是只用眼睛来看这周遭的一切。
天使不会轻易变节,
你满身包裹的罪恶,
注定和土鸡瓦犬为伍。

你恼羞成怒,
不服从我,刑场就是你最后的归宿。
去死吧。

哀号着,哀号着。
我意识到我的人生就要走到尽头。
今天,我是一头待宰的羔羊,
但是,屠刀将宣告我永远的自由。
我的火焰即将熄灭,
但我播下的火种,
最终将烧毁你那罪恶的温床。

注意听吧,我留下的诗,
已化作早间山谷里的回响,
那是流传千年的诅咒。
仔细瞧吧,我留下的词,
已成为山间的一团浓雾,
那里尽是我无助的叹息。

我的归宿,
在太阳的黑洞里,
万丈光芒的背后,
正是我的家。
在寂静的夜晚,
草原上最后的一道流星,
划过繁星点点的夜幕,
那是我的身影,
Fade away.

另附七绝一首:

生前尝作武乡侯,
壮士从容对断头。
翻雨覆云嫌梦少,
千年倾唱万年忧。
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hepingdao
Site Admin


Joined: 25 May 2006
Posts: 8106

hepingdaoCollection
PostPosted: 2007-05-27 09:10:44    Post subject: Reply with quote

情绪太外露和直接了

愈是直接的方式,愈难写
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为网友服务: 端茶倒水勤打扫!
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杨海军
进士出身


Joined: 01 Mar 2007
Posts: 2205
Location: 吉林
杨海军Collection
PostPosted: 2007-05-27 15:31:36    Post subject: Reply with quote

是啊,直白一些,多来交流!!祝 好!!
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走了很久了。还清晰地望见/身后那盏明灭的灯火/好像我们走的越久越远/故乡的那盏灯就越亮
——拙作《离开村庄》
http://blog.sina.com.cn/u/1269376751
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白水
大学士


Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection
PostPosted: 2007-05-27 15:51:51    Post subject: Reply with quote

我到挺欣赏这首七绝
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