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Maple Review Home -> 古韵新音

七律-新春六十初度有感

笑聊
探花

Joined: 05 Jan 2010
Posts: 3448
Location: 中国江苏无锡
笑聊Collection

Posted: 2014-01-29 19:53:41 Post subject: 七律-新春六十初度有感

笑聊恭祝各位老师朋友马年吉祥，阖家安康，万事如意！！！梁溪散人人生不过百年路，事事何须论短长？豁达胸怀巡五岳，无为手笔抒三湘。临溪趺坐游鱼数，依树凝眸幻狗望。一笑恩仇痕迹去，世间行走善真扬。

黄洋界
探花

Joined: 23 Mar 2007
Posts: 3301
Location: 多伦多,加拿大
黄洋界Collection

Posted: 2014-01-30 00:49:09 Post subject:

祝贺笑聊兄花甲荣寿！ _________________ ++++++++++++++ 喜金石书画，友竹菊梅兰

qinghongh
榜眼

Joined: 14 Oct 2007
Posts: 4110

qinghonghCollection

Posted: 2014-01-30 07:06:57 Post subject:

豁达胸怀巡五岳，无为手笔抒三湘。有气势！笑聊兄马年快乐！

晓松
举人

Joined: 26 Feb 2007
Posts: 1192

晓松Collection

Posted: 2014-01-30 21:49:54 Post subject:

首先恭贺笑聊兄，进入一甲子！由不惑、知天命，到耳顺，初度有感正是抒发了人生襟怀。新春快乐！

Daxia
秀才

Joined: 26 Apr 2013
Posts: 163
Location: Mississauga, Canada
DaxiaCollection

Posted: 2014-01-31 02:22:49 Post subject:

笑聊兄莫不是属马地？马上有福啊！ _________________ Daxia

白水
大学士

Joined: 02 Oct 2006
Posts: 14102
Location: TORONTO
白水Collection

Posted: 2014-01-31 12:01:25 Post subject:

恭贺新春，马到功成

秋叶
秀才

Joined: 17 Feb 2007
Posts: 769

秋叶Collection

Posted: 2014-02-01 07:59:04 Post subject:

笑聊 wrote:

笑聊恭祝各位老师朋友马年吉祥，阖家安康，万事如意！！！
...

笑聊兄大作所言极是，祝马年进步，万事如愿！

小山云子
童生

Joined: 18 Jan 2014
Posts: 7

小山云子Collection

Posted: 2014-02-02 03:06:57 Post subject:

笑老的前二句和后二句写得颇成功，只是中四句依我拙见，应还纠点平仄，而“望”字此仄音，也没入韵了吧？如校一下，是否更妙？

笑聊
探花

Joined: 05 Jan 2010
Posts: 3448
Location: 中国江苏无锡
笑聊Collection

Posted: 2014-02-02 19:28:27 Post subject:

黄洋界 wrote:

祝贺笑聊兄花甲荣寿！

问候黄老！新年好！

江南一带祝寿是逢九祝寿。学生是55年未羊，真是59岁。

谢谢黄老！

笑聊
探花

Joined: 05 Jan 2010
Posts: 3448
Location: 中国江苏无锡
笑聊Collection

Posted: 2014-02-02 19:29:47 Post subject:

qinghongh wrote:

豁达胸怀巡五岳，无为手笔抒三湘。

有气势！

笑聊兄马年快乐！

庆宏兄新年快乐！

谢谢庆宏兄提读点评！

笑聊
探花

Joined: 05 Jan 2010
Posts: 3448
Location: 中国江苏无锡
笑聊Collection

Posted: 2014-02-02 19:31:30 Post subject:

晓松 wrote:

首先恭贺笑聊兄，进入一甲子！由不惑、知天命，到耳顺，初度有感正是抒发了人生襟怀。新春快乐！

晓松兄新年好！

谢谢晓松兄赏读点评鼓励！

笑聊
探花

Joined: 05 Jan 2010
Posts: 3448
Location: 中国江苏无锡
笑聊Collection

Posted: 2014-02-02 19:34:15 Post subject:

Daxia wrote:

笑聊兄莫不是属马地？ Smile

马上有福啊！

Daxia兄新年好！

我55年未羊。谢谢您的吉言，祝福您！

笑聊
探花

Joined: 05 Jan 2010
Posts: 3448
Location: 中国江苏无锡
笑聊Collection

Posted: 2014-02-02 19:36:55 Post subject:

白水 Moonlight wrote:

恭贺新春，马到功成

问候白水兄！
谢谢！祝新年快乐！骏马奔驰，更上层楼！

笑聊
探花

Joined: 05 Jan 2010
Posts: 3448
Location: 中国江苏无锡
笑聊Collection

Posted: 2014-02-02 19:39:22 Post subject:

秋叶 wrote:

笑聊 wrote:

笑聊恭祝各位老师朋友马年吉祥，阖家安康，万事如意！！！
...

笑聊兄大作所言极是，祝马年进步，万事如愿！

秋叶兄新年好！

谢谢鼓励！祝马年吉祥，事事如意！

笑聊
探花

Joined: 05 Jan 2010
Posts: 3448
Location: 中国江苏无锡
笑聊Collection

Posted: 2014-02-02 19:50:06 Post subject:

小山云子 wrote:

笑老的前二句和后二句写得颇成功，只是中四句依我拙见，应还纠点平仄，而“望”字此仄音，也没入韵了吧？如校一下，是否更妙？

问候小云山朋友新年好！
临屏寄语朋友：
探讨交流欣喜尝，诗词格律韵绵长。
个中自有悠闲乐，不枉耕耘辛苦忙。

望：下平七阳作观望（平声）

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