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旅途 (
博弈
榜眼


Joined: 21 Dec 2006
Posts: 4381
Location: SFO
博弈Collection
PostPosted: 2007-04-16 17:16:36    Post subject: 旅途 ( Reply with quote

旅途 (小改, 先搁着)

如果你是诗 (那会是怎样的一首旋律!)
我想会有这两个字:坚 贞
我驻足,墨溢囊盈却走耕淤地
(直到有一天人们说他疯了,爱的是病因,也是病果。)
纸后有的
美丽
(枝间种下的许多,纷繁的人是看不到的;)
如果你是一首诗,我来回许久。
(你不要为我诗,诗人。)

青春年少时的地球
而今绕了它几十圈
此身在何方
山峦在晨曦的掩盖下,呼吸敬意,吐纳虚明
痛苦来自这心的依然年少
这只期待美好的心,赤子必行,一种折磨,一种糟蹋
老去的皮箱,诗的

风尘
颦域,深刻入骨
痛苦的岂是皮相
健壮—
这期待死亡的心,时而甘愿,时而埋怨
躲在Gate 101候机室最隐秘的一端
看着—
升降,起伏
声波无视存在, 春茧试舞薄笙
旋绕间,有一个美少年
自十七走来,问
你就是我么?
_________________
(在不斷的審醜裡終將建立起新的審美)
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kokho
进士出身


Joined: 30 Nov 2006
Posts: 2642
Location: Singapore
kokhoCollection
PostPosted: 2007-04-16 23:26:52    Post subject: Re: 旅途 ( Reply with quote

博弈 wrote:
旅途 (小改, 先搁着)

如果你是诗 (那会是怎样的一首旋律!)
我想会有这两个字:坚 贞
我驻足,墨溢囊盈却走耕淤地
(直到有一天人们说他疯了,爱的是病因,也是病果。)

纸后有的
美丽
(枝间种下的许多,纷繁的人是看不到的;)
如果你是一首诗,我来回许久。
(你不要为我诗,诗人。)

青春年少时的地球
而今绕了它几十圈
此身在何方
山峦在晨曦的掩盖下,呼吸敬意,吐纳虚明
痛苦来自这心的依然年少
这只期待美好的心,赤子必行,一种折磨,一种糟蹋
老去的皮箱,诗的


风尘
颦域,深刻入骨
痛苦的岂是皮相
健壮—
这期待死亡的心,时而甘愿,时而埋怨
躲在Gate 101候机室最隐秘的一端

看着—
升降,起伏
声波无视存在, 春茧试舞薄笙
旋绕间,有一个美少年
自十七走来,问
你就是我么



惘然回顾 鬓如霜。。。
还是你写的形象!!!


_________________
乒乓、摄影、诗歌
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韩少君
进士出身


Joined: 06 Apr 2007
Posts: 2558
Location: 吉林四平
韩少君Collection
PostPosted: 2007-04-18 14:08:06    Post subject: 关注 Reply with quote

自十七走来,问
你就是我吗
好句子

全诗是否还可简练
_________________
靠才华为自己带来幸福的是才子;靠才华为自己带来痛苦的是诗人!!http://blog.sina.com.cn/hanshaojun345
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