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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

梦：白凤凰

游戏诗歌
秀才

Joined: 21 Jun 2006
Posts: 618
Location: 吉林省和龙市华林路64-12-1号
游戏诗歌Collection

Posted: 2012-10-27 10:50:45 Post subject: 梦：白凤凰

梦：白凤凰游戏诗歌作不是彩凤凰，是白凤凰是一朵白云幻化的白凤凰高扬的凤头，凤冠轻盈而雪白的一对凤翅长长的凤尾飘逸从东南的天空飞向西南的天空又从西南的天空回旋东南我确信看到白凤凰，心生欢喜我知道我是梦中看到白凤凰白凤凰远在高空我看的很清楚，我干脆仰躺大地上我的目光在蓝天追随自由飞翔的白凤凰仿佛身处菜园，我周围还有人但我感觉我周围的人没有看到白凤凰 2012-10-28 于长白山上海兰江畔

chenrunmin
进士出身

Joined: 21 Nov 2009
Posts: 2427
Location: nanjing.jiangsu.china.
chenrunminCollection

Posted: 2012-10-27 21:20:11 Post subject:

白凤凰远在高空我看的很清楚，我干脆仰躺大地上我的目光在蓝天追随自由飞翔的白凤凰仿佛身处菜园，我周围还有人但我感觉我周围的人没有看到白凤凰 _________________ 一个来自南京，普通大众中的人。

hepingdao
Site Admin

Joined: 25 May 2006
Posts: 8106

hepingdaoCollection

Posted: 2012-10-29 10:32:03 Post subject:

很美妙的梦境白凤凰比彩凤凰更难得 _________________ 为网友服务: 端茶倒水勤打扫!

金金
进士出身

Joined: 08 Feb 2007
Posts: 2035
Location: 山东济宁
金金Collection

Posted: 2012-11-04 14:30:06 Post subject:

自我胡诌的“心灵观后感”。写直接阐述的诗歌需要极大的文字处理经验，你还是多读书再写吧。 _________________ http://blog.sina.com.cn/shirenjinjin

金金
进士出身

Joined: 08 Feb 2007
Posts: 2035
Location: 山东济宁
金金Collection

Posted: 2012-11-04 14:31:27 Post subject:

自我胡诌的“心灵观后感”。写直接阐述的诗歌需要极大的文字处理经验，你还是多读书再写吧。 _________________ http://blog.sina.com.cn/shirenjinjin

游戏诗歌
秀才

Joined: 21 Jun 2006
Posts: 618
Location: 吉林省和龙市华林路64-12-1号
游戏诗歌Collection

Posted: 2012-11-04 17:18:19 Post subject:

金金 wrote:

自我胡诌的“心灵观后感”。写直接阐述的诗歌需要极大的文字处理经验，你还是多读书再写吧。

你说的不对！
这是因为你的心灵根本进入不了幻象的状态之中

金金
进士出身

Joined: 08 Feb 2007
Posts: 2035
Location: 山东济宁
金金Collection

Posted: 2012-11-04 17:19:48 Post subject:

论坛管得不严，但希望遵守。 2、每人每天限制发表一个主题。如果您有多首诗歌需要发表，请集中在一个帖子中，但每个帖子最多不要超过3首。 _________________ http://blog.sina.com.cn/shirenjinjin

游戏诗歌
秀才

Joined: 21 Jun 2006
Posts: 618
Location: 吉林省和龙市华林路64-12-1号
游戏诗歌Collection

Posted: 2012-11-04 17:21:22 Post subject:

金金 wrote:

论坛管得不严，但希望遵守。
...

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Maple Review Home -> 现代诗歌

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